Torn Between to Lovers

Updated on April 13, 2008
S.R. asks from Auburndale, FL
3 answers

I am in a situation, that I don't know which way to go. I love both men, well I care for one and love the other. The first one is I was married to him actually twice. First time 9 months and the second time for about 6 years. I only married him the first time because it was for support reasons,sorry, had children and I did want not my kids to go without nothing. I could not stand for this man to touch me but i dealt with it. I guess over the years I got usto him and just went with the flow. I felt guilty for marrying him and did not love him. We took each other through a lot of changes. We both cheated on each other, but I think the only reason he did it was because he had no choice. Sometimes we were not intimate for about 3 months, who could blame him. I have left this man about 18 times back and forth. I guess I was in secure. I was molested when I was a child and I guess I don't know what love really is. My mom is still with the man, my stepfather who molested me. I have been searching for love a long time now, and I guess I am scared since I did not love him the way he should have been loved as a wife should that, you know the old saying "you reap with you sow." I am 46 years of age and I am lost. I am in an relationship now, and I really like him. My ex-husband called me and stated he is getting married, and for some reason that bothered me, but he also stated he does not love her, and the only reason he is getting married is because since I am not coming back he don't want to spend the rest of his life alone. I guess what I am asking is do I love him or I'm I just being selfish again. My new boyfriend is great. But I seem to be trying to find a way out, because my ex called me and asked would I come over to see him, he misses me. Don't know what to do. Help.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from Lakeland on

To be quiet honest I had a similar situation. Except I loved a man who could not be loved and after 6yrs i moved on and when I found a man he conviently came back into my life and i felt confused also. But I took a leap of faith with the new man since as you said you already know what you left behind- I went for something brand new and no demons- I have been married for 12 yrs now with three kids- no regrets- I am 42

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.C.

answers from Lakeland on

I recommend you seek some counseling. Louise Henry is great and she works with the fees for you. Your Ex is wrong to have called you and may just be playing you. Seek some professional help and go from there. Don't do anything rash right now, I have been there and done that and it never works that way.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.R.

answers from Lakeland on

Go with the one you love most, it kinda makes no sence to leave someone you care for, for someone you care less for. Just go with the person you have more fun with and get along with better...hope this helps. if you want to talk more you can reach me at ____@____.com Good luck and Godbless.

1 mom found this helpful
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions