Too Tired to Do Anything Constructive...

AMEN - the laundry's done, so we have clean clothes to wear, but still in piles. The dishes are clean, but still in the dishwasher. It was 75 and sunny here yesterday - unusual for May in Upstate NY - so we went out and played all afternoon, in the garden, at the playground. So now it's Monday, back to work and school. Oh well, will have think about a clean house another day :)

I try to remember that they are only small for a short time.

I too feel like you in that how is it that when you spend all day outside the house is still a disaster!?! I get rid of as much as possibble but with 3 kids (( 9 yo, 3 yo and 9 month old) there is always a lot of stuff to have. I use to get up at 7 am but lately the baby has been gettine up between 5:30 and 6am. I find that I can get a lot done by putting her in the high chair with some puffs or cherrios and work fast and QUIET!!! I save the vacuuming for when everyone is up but I can dishes, the whole kitchen, diningroom and livingroom and bathroom before the other two are up (and fighting)!

Sometimes though I just say "forget it" the mess will be back later so why bother and snuggle with the baby instead. SNUGGLING IS SO MUCH MORE FUN!!!

Amen sista! HAHAHA

Yes, I am now a fan of paper plates, and in the summer we eat out on the porch, that way if food gets on the deck, some bug or stray wild animal will eat it while we sleep.

Laundry and dishes (yes I still have to do some washing) seems to be a never ending battle.

Bathing children in the summer? The hose and a small swimming pool. Ok so I occasionally throw some soap in there but beats me trying to fight getting her inside and into a bath.

My house is such a mess that when my friend was going to have her hubby stop by to pick-up some stuff while she was in the hospital, I packed up both kids and her stuff and went to her. Goodness forbid he saw my living room looking like an episode of hoarders!

Hang in there. Back when we were all out of my parents house (my brother and sister have since moved back in) my mom had that place spotless!

~Kristal

I agree with Patty 100%!!! Just smile at those ants and turn a blind eye to the dishes for tonight. I just passed through my kitchen and looked at the crockpot that is soaking and the dishwasher light that is blinking that I need to unload and reload, and what did I do? I decided to read my daughter a bedtime story and then sit down to relax for a few minutes. After a day of coloring, hide and seek, and bubble blowing I think I am going to let that crockpot soak some more and keep those dishes in the dishwasher until tomorrow. I applaud you for being such an awesome active mommy! Your kids are only young once and you're making memories that will last a lifetime!!

M.,
Whine On! You deserve to let off a little steam. Forget about that time you don't have and have it anyway. Watch those ants crawl by and smile because you have been doing something more important than cleaning.....PLAYING WITH YOUR KIDS.

YOU GO GIRL!

hillarious thoughts, espeically on the Ants!

You sound like you have your priorities right to me. I heard that no one ever regrets not doing the dishes, but people often regret not spending time with their kids.

A lot of us are there, it just can't all be done all the time. Kudos for you for being able to spell linoleum too, and extra points that you can see it! Keep fishing and hiking, the walmart dishes (yeah!) will be there when you get back, and if you have to wash them to eat off them next time, so what? I bet your kids have to write an essay on monday morning, they will write about fishing and hiking and not what is in the sink!

Whine away...it makes us all feel better!

M.

Love it! Just draw a big line with chalk on the floor...I hear the ants don't like to cross it! When you're 50 and the kids are away in college you aren't gonna be thinking "Geez...I wish I would have had a cleaner kitchen when the kids were growing up!"

We'll have clean kitchens...and bathrooms...some day. Just not right now:)
Have fun hiking, fishing, and enjoying your family!

Sounds like me lol! I am drop dead tired worked 9 hour days, come home play with the kids and try to cook! I sit in the house sometimes after the kids go to sleep thinking does that really need to be picked up? Do the kids really NEED that many toys all of which I have to pick up everynight before I go to bed? I spent all day outside swimming with them and my husband and just looked at the house when I came in! I knew I could probably do another load of laundry or maybe even make my bed (whats the point going to jump in it later that night). Whine and Whine some more get the stress out of your system and try to relax! All mamas should take a minute to enjoy the fact that they spent time with their kids, had a great day with them and the husband and that this mama is tired and needs a minute to just think about her lol!

Couldn't agree with you more!

Many years before I got pregnant I read a wonderful list by Irma Bombeck of things she would have done differently. The one that stuck was that she wouldn't have worried so much about the dishes and stains on the throw pillows, and would have spent more time enjoying the children.

I live that way each day. And I've got about 5 loads of laundry waiting, dishes in the sink and dishwasher, a ring around the bathtub (I know, that one really does need my attention LOL) and a stack of ironing as high as the family room ceiling.

BUT, I laid with my boy until he fell asleep tonight, just because he asked me to. I'm sure the day will be here all too soon when he doesn't want me to be with him to fall asleep.

You're doing great.

Whine away! You're a mom talking to other moms! :-)

Frankly, it's really nice to know that other moms are living in messy houses. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one. (We've got ants, too!) But our priorities are time with our kids and each other. There will definitely be time for clean houses--later!

It doesn't sound like your husband has issues with this (which is another discussion entirely!) so unless it's really bothering you, let it go. If it's bugging you (no pun intended), then try to focus on keeping one area clean. Whether it's the kitchen so you can find a bit of counter space or your bedroom so you have a little sanctuary, 10-15 minutes a day in that room isn't too much to do you in, but it will definitely give you a lift. Other than that, enjoy your precious family!

There is a poem, can't remember the whole thing but the end goes:
so quiet down cobwebs and dust go to sleep, I am rocking my baby and
babies don't keep!
The house and laundry will always be there, your kids grow so quickly
just enjoy them! Have fun.

I can relate... I look forward to every weekend to spend with my child, not working, and enjoying a relaxing time... the thing is, it's not all that relaxing picking up after a 3.5 year old!! ;) I find that he sometimes wants to help me, too, so I give him little jobs, like wiping the table after we eat, folding laundry (which he loves!!!) and picking up his toys...

I try to do a little housework and then a little play, to keep a balance. For example, we'll tidy up the bedroom and then go to the park. Then my son will watch a half hour show while I clean the bathroom... I never get everything done, but it's good enough. And I agree with Patty, the most important part of it is spending quality time with your kids. Don't be too hard on yourself - you are doing the best you can, and all mommies deserve some pampering time just to themselves, too. So, get out of the kitchen, and do something nice just for you sometimes, too. :)

Raising hand... add me to the crowd of "Gravity storm has gotten me... please don't send reinforcements or rescue, I'm perfectly happy curled up right here for the next week or so."

Winter the house looks okay most of the time, because we're not here. Spring we're sort of here... and the house shows it.

Latin books, and science experiments... a box of kleenex, 1.5 remote controls. A pillow (sans case), a duvet sans comforter. 2 stacks of clothes (that have mysteriously ended up folded, and will have to be unfolded in order to be put away). A camera. A waterbottle in a neoprene cocoon. 3 placemats rolled into tubes. Little League Baseball photos. A precariously balanced stack of what appear to be notebooks. An empty gatorade bottle. Hotwheels cars. One giant package each of AAA & AA batteries. An empty shoebox I've been saving. 1 purse. 1 tiffany lampshade (28" in diameter).

Otherwise Known As: Things I can see on my dining room table, without bothering to stand up and look on the other side... My dining room table was clean on thursday. :)

But they're born from days at the baseball stadium, and hiking in the woods... from trips to the dog park followed by playdates at the people park. From cloudwatching and kiteflying, and school on the go... from "Yikes we're late to gymnastics class" to sleeping bags on the porch watching stars through the scope.

I mourne my messy house, as I live here and like the serenity of negative space... and as I shunt playdates to neutral ground I am nothing if not awash with guilt. But there are too many fun things to do during the day, and at night if I make the mistake of sitting... a gravity storm gobbles me up.

Note to self: attempt to train ants

To tired to do anything constructive? Well, sounds to me like you did a lot - WITH YOUR KIDS! So be proud, rest and eventually the cleaning will get done, only to get dirty again! I HATE CLEANING. I think a cleaning lady should be a necessity. But its not! You're doing a lot and you're doing great! Your kids will grow up to remember the hiking and other things, not whether or not your kitchen sink was empty!
: )

My sink is full right now, but I did manage to pick up a bit. Don't even talk about the condition of the bathroom. I just make a list of things to do, and tell myself that if I get at least one thing started (not necessarily finished) each day, then I did well.

Now that the weather is nice, everyone has spring fever. Cut yourself some slack!

Sounds like you have done a lot constructive today.
My friend has a sign in her house that says "This house is clean enough to be healthy, and dirty enough to be happy."

When I clean, I concentrate on the stuff that makes me crazy. I'll dust just the one light-fixture I notice every day, and ignore the picture frames and the top of the armoire that I never look at. The house feels cleaner to me, even though nobody else would be able to tell the difference.

Just blitz through the big stuff once or twice a month, and for the rest "clean as you go." Get the kids to help. Post-dinner everybody except the cook spends five minutes clearing the table and loading the washer. Post-play, have them put all the cars in that storage bin.

I love to be on the go with my children and don't like housework either! We were on a limited budget but had a cleaner come in for 4 hours every other week. That freed me up from the deep cleaning. Jobs for the kids - when young they think it's a privilege and rite of passage to be able to help. When they realize it is also hard work, it is simply there on the written job chart and I cheerfully explain that we are a family and everyone is needed to keep the family going.

Things that have helped us:
Set the timer for 5 minutes and blitz the place. Put on music.

Say, "First clean up your room, then we'll go out to the park (something they want to do)."

If they aren't cleaning up, calmly state, "You have x minutes to clean up your room/living room/play room (a reasonable amount of time - you know they can succeed). Anything out of place is mine." Then go in with a garbage bag and take everything that is out of place and take it away. It is yours. You can throw it out, give it away, put it away for a few weeks or months. I only had to do that once (and then 6 months later when they had slackened). Next time I said it was clean up time, they hopped to it.

I do not clean up their rooms, play room or living room - it is on their list (ages 9 and 6). They clear the table, load and unload the dishwasher, help fold and put away their laundry, clear everything out of the bathroom when I need to clean it. As a treat they get to take off their clothes and scoot around the kitchen washing the floor squeeling. Vacuuming is another big deal - if you get everything else done.

Lastly, we have clean up time before dinner.

Hope this helps! Enlist the troops!

E.

Fill the sink with really hot water and soap and let the dishes soak while you relax and think of it as 'doing the dishes time.' Then in 15 minutes or so the dishes will be practically clean, rinse and put in a drain and relax while you are 'drying the dishes.' The same goes for laundry, put a load in and do something for YOU while it is washing. Someone asks what you are doing you can say the laundry.
And if you dont clean on Saturday what will happen? Will the Clean Police camp out on your door step? The same stuff that is on the bedroom floor Saturday will be there on Sunday or Monday, so relax and ENJOY your family. Tomorrow they will be off to college and your house will be spotless and you will be wishing that they were around to mess it up.

You are not alone. There have been many times that paper plates and plastic silverware sound like a good idea.

I work part-time at an Elementary School and attend online college. I have two children still at home..17, and 3. My 3 yr. old helps out more around the house...lol.

I still have dishes in the sink from Friday and laundry pushed to the foot of my bed because I did not feel like putting it away last night. I have a pile of mail on my kitchen table that needs my attention..eventually.

I feel like I am doing everything for everyone else and when it comes to "me" time, I am too exhausted. Some days I don't have time for my children because I have paperwork and schoolwork to get done. I thank God that I will be done working in 2 weeks. That will free up a lot of my time.

The whole thing is based on poor scheduling and putting other things first that should be last. I try to make a daily schedule to follow and on my days off during the week, I try to get in 2 hours of "quiet time" for myself. It ends up being spent doing homework or cleaning so by the time I get everything done and want to watch TV, my youngest is up from her nap and wants my undivided attention.

I know what you mean about Saturdays. I spent the majority of Saturday writing two papers for school. Yesterday after church/lunch, I spent the afternoon driving to my office to turn in my weekly paperwork. We didn't get home until 4:30. It seems like I wasted the whole day.

As far as cleaning goes, I clean before I go to bed. I hate waking up to a messy house. We also clean up before "nap time" too.

I even get up at 5am so I can have time alone to check my emails and whatever else I can get accomplished before the kids get up. Speaking of which, I have to get them up and get ready for work.

Just know you are no alone.

flylady.net and get the kids to help

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V. C.

I think it's time to change your definition of "constructive"! What's more constructive than getting your children (and yourself) outside and physically engaged for most of the day, like humans were intended to be? What an amazing lifelong precedent you are setting for them! You sound like a wonderful mother with your priorities in the right place! And, I don't know how old your kids are, but one of my favorite parenting slogans is "if they can walk, they can work." I swear I strapped a swiffer pad to my infant when she started crawling, haha! Make cleaning fun, buy small appliances that work (not those popcorn-sounding fake vacuum cleaners...what's the point of that!?) and use all that fun stuff they get to do outside to motivate them to help you clean inside. I know, all easier said than done, but I'm hoping the extra time and patience I put in now, in terms of modeling chores, singing incessant annoying clean-up songs, getting creative about it all, will make the household participation mentality second nature.

I know exactly how you feel. While I am outside most of the day I am thinking about what needs to be done inside. Sometimes I pray for rain so that we can stay indoors and I can get things done! Sad but true. LOL By the end of the day I am so tired that I can't see straight. I do the same thing, while she is taking a bath I start to clean the bathroom. Also while she is eating lunch I am doing the dishes or cleaning other things. I throw a load of laundry in the washer before we go out and in between I will throw it in the dryer, start a new load and back outside we go. When my husband gets home from work he will stay with her for a little while so that I can get some things done. It is very frustrating. I feel for you. But I know that her being outside is the best for her and I just do what I can. If ppl don't like the way my house looks then don't look at it! LOL Good luck and just enjoy your kids while you can.

It's okay to not entertain the kids all day. If you are a SAHM, you can have a "quiet hour" even if they do not actually nap,. They need to stay in their beds and look at books while you have some catch up time, and also, gate them into a safe area for short periods of the day so that you can catch up. Clean up messes as they happen, don't leave them for later. When you're in a room, do a 5 minute cleanup. If you have a lot of clutter, don't leave a room without putting something away
Good luck!