I have a 12 week old that is being a great little sleeper (shortest block 5.5 hrs, does 8 a few times a week). My problem is my daughter. She will be 2 this Saturday, and for the past few months, since moving her to her new room/bed, she wakes up during the night about 3-4 times a week. At first, it was only once every few weeks, and it was night-terrors or something. Now, it's like she just wants company and to bug me. Last night, she just appeared and said "hi mom." She wanted to be covered. 10 minutes later I heard her calling, then 10 minutes after that. A few weeks back when she was awake my son woke up. So she knows I am up with him. I never stay in the room longer than to tell her to get back in bed, etc.
What do I do? I can't handle both of them getting me up. I need my sleep or I get real grumpy, with no patience. I want to be the best mom I can be, so what do I do to encourage my daughter to not get up? I can't just send hubby in, as she then throws a fit until I give her a hug. Suggestions?
She may be cutting her second molars...seems like those particular teeth cause a lot a pain for some.
Your 2 year old is going through a lot of adjustments at once - a new brother, a new bed. Plus children go through natural fluctuations in sleep habits.
She's not doing it to make your life miserable, she's trying to tell you she needs more attention (my guess based upon the kinds of requests she's making). She's probably having a hard time letting you know that she's more needy for the attention she used to receive before her brother came along.
I WOULD NOT recommend doing anything to trap your child in their room. First, from a safety standpoint in the event she ever needed to get out and secondly from creating fear and anxiety - their bedroom is supposed to be a safe, happy place. If she gets scared by not being able to get out, you'll have a much worse problem on your hands.
Instead, I'd recommend changing your schedule with her so she's getting more one-on-one attention with you and Daddy. I'd also explain that there will be consequences for not staying in her room (or you can reward her for staying in there).
We have 2 kids - one is a horrible sleeper and hardly ever stays in his room all night. The other is a rock-solid sleeper. Different kids, different needs. No matter what we try with our son, he's up in the middle of the night and wants to sleep next to Mommy. Most nights, it's just easier to let him into the bed than to fight it (I know that's going to get a lot of responses from other moms who don't agree with it).
Each and every time she gets up, walk her back to her room, tuck her in and give her a kiss. Don't have a dialogue with her, just walk her back. Eventually it will stop. I wouldn't make a huge issue out of it- lots of adjustments in a short period of time. She may be cutting molars as well- my son has started waking-up once in a while (same age) and within a few days, we find a "back tooth" poking through!
I am sure she is still adjusting to having a new baby brother..
she probably does hear him crying and wakes up sometimes.
you coudl try a "prize" if she stays in her bed allnight.. maybe a m&m.
We have the same problem going on. We felt as if we tried everything with our 3 year old. A suggestion from a friend (that has worked great) is to put (on the inside of your child's door) is one of those door knob covers that turn around in circles so they can't get out. The first night was rough...lots of crying, but we let him calm himself (afterall he has a night light, he's surrounded by stuffed animals, and has 3 favorite blankets. When we tuck him in we remind him that he is surrounded by his friends and favorites, and that mommy and daddy are going to sleep now too, and that it is time for him to stay in his bed, b/c mommy and daddy are not going to keep coming back in to check on him. Night 2 went great, and he's been staying in his bed for 4 weeks now! We just took off the door knob cover at the beginning of this week, and he hasn't tried to get out of bed. It's just a way to keep getting attention, and going in there is only causing "negative" attention even if it's just to tell her to go back to bed. Be firm and let her know that if you have to come in there that there WILL be consequences. Our little on lost TV for an entire day...he usually get 2 1/2 hour segments...the other time he lost his favorite toy and blanket. Be firm, and pick items that will affect them and show you are serious.
Sounds like she's adjusting to the new things in her life and pushing the envelope to see how far you will let things go. She probably just needs a little more love and nurturing. I would recommend one of these options:
1. Walk her back to her room / Go into her room and give her a kiss. Tell her it's night night time and that you will be out in the living room and will check on her later. If she gets out of bed, walk her back. My daughter stood in her doorway the first night and cried. But after the first night, she was okay.
2. Let her get up and stand next to you while you feed the baby but tell her she has to use her whispering/sleepy time voice. Sit in there and then tuck her back in when you are done with the baby.
3. Let her get into bed and sleep with you.
4. Put the baby in your room and some kind of fan/white noise machine to help block out the noise in her room.
I have a six month old who shares a room with his 2.5 year old sister. Up until a few weeks ago, she was up 1-4 times EVERY night of the week. After he moved into her room, she sleeps through the night MOST nights of the week, even when he cries. I think she was already adjusted to hearing him crying when he was in our room for a few months.
She may feel like she's being left out and that is why she wants to get up. Do whatever works for YOUR family (no matter what everyone else says/suggests). Co-sleeping may never be an option for you while it's the best option for others. Letting her get/stay up with you while you feed the baby may NEVER work for you but others may find it's the easiest solution for their child to get back to sleep. Trial and error....just find something that works and go with it!!
I never thought that I'd leave my children's door open - just because from birth - a few weeks ago, my daughter slept with her door shut in the complete DARK. Now she wants the door open and some light on outside her room and she is happy. My son cries and it never wakes her up - she may toss and turn but that is about it. That being said, I'm still up 1-3 times a night with my son and I wake up when hubby comes home from work and goes to bed so I am just used to getting 1-2 hours of sleep in a row (a few times a night). I figure I'll sleep when they are grown and out of the house!!
