Toddler Tantrum Question

Normal. Try giving her more transition. Say, in 5 mins we are going to go take a bath. We set a timer on microwave. Hard to argue with the timer. Also, distraction is a big help to head off a tantrum. If you see one coming, try redirecting by asking toddler to help you with something and offering a choice. Say do yo want the blue towel or the pink towel tonight. Do you want bubbles or no bubbles. Give choices when you don't mind the outcome and then you will have more say on the big things. Also, I try to look at the positive side of a tantrum, if there is one lol... It's that my child is asserting her personality and developing skills. I hate to tell you, but I thought tantrums at 16 months were horrible. Now that dd is three, man, the tantruming takes on a whole new level bc they try to reason wobble you :). Good luck! Be firm and consistent. Read a ton of parenting books and find what resonates with you and husband.

My DD is 17 months old, and has occasional full-blown tantrums like you described. I can usually tell if something is bringing it on, or if she's just in a tantrum mood, and I handle it accordingly. So if she's teething, sick, etc. I will give her a little leeway and give her cuddles, medicine, food, whatever I think will make her feel better.. If she's just in a temper, I will put her in her time-out spot and completely ignore her until she calms down. It works out pretty well for me. I don't like putting my DD in her crib as punishment though, because I feel like that should be a safe haven for her and I wouldn't want her to confuse being put to bed with getting punished.

Is she getting sick? Slightly dehydrated from a busy day? Giving up a nap? Getting molars? Witnessing the same behavior from another child at daycare? Most or all of the above? :)

I think it's normal for the age, but still surprising to see for the first time! I think you did the right thing, too - letting her know that the behavior isn't going to get extra attention from mom and dad.

Sounds totally normal. One thing though, check her gums around where her big molars in the back would come in...she could be cutting a monster tooth!

I think you handled the situation well.. the tantrums are so much fun!! LOL, jk.. atleast it happened at home and not when you were out and about. Sometimes all you can do is walk away and chuckle... expect tantrums from now up to about 4 or 14 according to who you talk to ;) Just dont give in when the tantrums occur, stand your ground mama!! Even though it is age appropriate it doesnt mean the behavior is acceptable.. Good luck!!! hehe..

My pediatrician told me to expect tantrums at my son's 15month checkup,and shortly after, sure enough, they started! However, they are short-lived! I never ignore him or put him in another room, and we always distract him so it's over fast, and I am not really sure putting her alone in her crib will help more than hurt... Babies don't like to be left alone when sad.

Totally normal -- probably triggered by being overtired. The best thing you can do is NOTHING. When my son was that age he threw some doozies and I quickly learned that the WORST thing I could do was touch him-- that would send him from screaming to hitting and biting. Stay close enough she doesn't feel abandoned but otherwise let it run it's course!

The other Mamas are right. It's totally normal and the best answer is to ignore, ignore, ignore. That is, after you have checked for teething, fever, and all that stuff.

Remember, if she is tired, has a tooth ache, a head ache, frustrated, scared, etc. she doesn't have words to tell you like an older child would. All she has is her fits, and her whining. As she gets older you will be able to supply her with the right words, "Are you hurt? Are you mad? Are you sleepy?" and she will begin to use them as well. Until them if she isn't hurt, sick, tired, hungry, thirsty or dirty leave it alone and if you don't feed the fit it won't grow.

Good answers! Check first for physical issues, and if it's just testing the boundaries and asserting independence, keep it in check. We would leave the room if they threw a tantrum. We gave expectations when going to a store or restaurant in terms they could understand, but also went at an hour where we hoped they would not interrupt others. I think it helped to expose them to more situations early, but that's just me. We love to travel and they are teens now, but were seasoned little fellows early on - I do think it was the exposure. Kids are all different as you know, do what works best for your little one(s).

Tantrums at this age are perfectly normal. But, keep your eye out and see if she is getting sick. My son would often have horrible behavior 3-4 days before "I" knew he was sick (he obviously knew he didn't feel well).

If she is not sick, then the key is consistency with your repercussions (whatever they may be).

Good luck!
L.

my son started this around 15mnths. Totally normal, but if she is refusing to sit down in the bathtub she might be afraid of it. She is at the age where she can notice the drain in the bathtub but not old enough to compehend she can't go through it. Thats what happened with my son. He got over that in a couple weeks intill then he showered with me.

I think you handled the tantrum just fine. If this is the only bad tantrum she has I would not worry about it. But if she continues to have them I would maybe check in with the pediatrician. This does sound worse then the typical tantrum but who know she may have an ear ache or a stomach ache or something that she just cannot express to you so she is having a tantrum instead. Good luck! I am sure it is no biggie!

I think totally normal and somewhat unpreventable. I would suggest offering favorite foods. My boys are prone to ridiculous behavior when they're hungry, and once you start tantrum mode they don't stop for regular food. I'm not saying buy them her candy every time she whines, but just when I see it coming I offer up some milk crackers- stat! Sometimes that and a comfy spot to eat them in will do the trick.

That sounds exactly like how my son would act at that age - and also sounds like how both of my children act when they are tired.

Lots of the parenting books talk about using empathy, and I really think that it is helpful. Instead of thinking about the totally irrational behavior when confronted with a toddler tantrum, think about how you feel when you are crying or mad or tired or frustrated and then empathize with your child. Also, they dont know what their emotions are and it helps to teach them and name them for them. "Ohh, baby feels mad because she doesnt want to sit in the bath and mommy is trying to make her sit down. Baby doesnt want to sit down. Baby feels mad. Its no fun to feel mad." It was amazing how that tactic worked helped my son calm down and by two, instead of kicking and screaming when I got him dressed, he would grumble "I feel frustrated because I want to play and not get dressed."

At this age, its really hard because they are too young to get time out. You can try to distract and redirect but that is about it. If you need to put the baby in the crib for a timeout for your sanity, do it. However, they really dont get cause and effect and consequences very well, and dont have alot of impulse control yet, so time outs dont do much for changing their behavior.

At this age, I loved the book, Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by Becky Bailey.

But to get to your question - yes - normal behavior but it still is hard and frustrating for both parents and babies. Your little girl wants to be independent and exercise her wants and wishes, but she does always know what she wants and isnt really rational.

Good luck! Enjoy her... :)

I would look into if she is getting enough sleep. She could just be exhausted from daycare too. My son starting having tantrums around that time. Love and Logic book helped me a lot. The important part is to not give her anything she wants when she has a tantrum and ignoring them when possible is good too as you did. I would avoid doing time out in her bed because then bed becomes a negative place and you don't want that. Start giving her some choices. She is getting older and may strive on getting a little more control. Do you want to wear the red or blue shirt...do you want to take a bath now or in 5 minutes...etc. Also, give her a 5 minute, then 2, then 1 minute warning when you are going to transition from one activity to the next. It gives her time to finish playing, etc and helps her know that you will be leaving soon. All of these things helped with my son and his tantrums. If you are out somewhere and she starts having a tantrum warn her once that she needs to behave or she will have to leave, if she continues you MUST leave. It only took a few times with my son for him to figure out that I would indeed take him out and he gave up the tantrums.

The love and logic program saved me when it came to my toddler's tantrums. I can't recommend those books enough.

My daughter started throwing tantrums like this at about 18 months, and since your daughter has been throwing "mini-tantrums" for a few months you shouldn't be surprised, they always escalate if unchecked ; )

It sounds as if she was very tired, which doesn't excuse the behavior, it's just most likely the reason. Keep taking her to her crib when she acts out, close the door and leave her in her room a couple of minutes, then go back and get her. She'll hopefully be calmed down like tonight and you can do what you normally do.

If you do this consistently, even several times a day or evening when she gets like this, she'll soon learn that throwing tantrums 1) doesn't get her her way, and 2) she misses out on time with you and dad.

Hang in there, it's going to be a long haul!

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1) Read "the Happiest Toddler on the Block" READ it and DO it.

2) It sounds as if your daughter didn't nap at daycare. My kid is normally civil, unless she didn't sleep well, the we have days like you described.

Good Luck!