Toddler Eating Issues

Updated on October 10, 2012
K.L. asks from Franklin, MA
10 answers

Like most toddlers, my almost 2 year old refuses to eat much on most days. However, he will almost always eat fruit, yogurt and piece of cheese, but I am trying to get him to eat what the rest of the family eats (esp with new baby coming anytime). I know it could be worse but I want some substance to his meals. Should I just give him the yogurt etc which he will eat and put the rest of the stuff on the side (which at that point he won't even touch)? Or should I give him only a plate of what we are having and if he doesn't eat it, too bad? Or try giving him what we are having, and if doesn't eat it, give him the fruit/yogurt that he wants (which I'm afraid will just teach him that he will be rewarded with it if he waits long enough). I know they say kids will eat what they need so maybe I'm worrying a little too much but he could stand to gain some weight. We stay away from snacks near mealtime so I know he's not already full...

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

You should give him what the rest of you are eating...in small portions. Give him one thing he will eat. Give him a dip (like ranch dressing) for his salad veggies if you serve those. Tell him this is all there is. Tell him the new house rule is he eats the same dinner as mommy and daddy because he is a big boy and not a baby. Do this over and over every dinner time. Don't really give him any attention for not eating much. Save his food for later if he gets hungry. That is what I do with my 2 year old (almost 3). I gave in more with her brother because I was so worried about him starving and he was so stubborn. If I could go back in time I'd not give in and make him a snack after dinner of foods he liked.

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I would do a combo of both. If he's not even 2 I personally don't think he's old enough for the "eat this or nothing" tactic, and in general I'm not a huge fan of it anyway. I would say give him what you are eating, even if he doesn't touch it. It takes time and eventually he'll start trying stuff, especially if he sees everyone else eating it. Encourage him to eat it, but don't go crazy, just mention it and offer it. I would also put some fruit and other favorite stuff on his plate, in addition to the meal you made, that you know he'll eat. That way he's eating when you eat, he has at least the same stuff on his plate that you're eating and he's seeing everyone eat together. Other than that, there isn't much you can do! They go through phases and 2 is when they start to realize that textures and colors matter! Darn it! So, just go with the flow.

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D..

answers from Charlotte on

He wants the sweet taste. He doesn't HAVE to eat the rest if you give him the sweet taste. You need to stop buying it and having it in the house. He will NOT starve. Don't make him eat. If he doesn't want it, say fine and take him down from the table.

You have to understand, mom, that he has trained you to do what he wants. He doesn't even have to TRY to like the foods you offer him. You are always bailing him out and giving him the sweet stuff.

When he fusses, just say "Oh I'm sorry honey. We don't have any. This is your dinner." Change the subject, munch down with quiet "Mmm!" noises and chat with your husband and ignore that he doesn't like the food. Don't give him ANY attention for his eating or not eating at the table. When he fusses and doesn't eat, say "You must be done" and take him down and continue to sit at the table and eat. He must see that you do not care.

If he comes back later to eat, put him up in his high chair, warm up his plate - the exact same food - and put it in front of him. Walk away. Do NOT sit with him. Dinner time and fun with family is over. If he won't eat it, it is time for bed.

He will only go to bed a few times hungry and then he will start eating something that you give him. Always try to have ONE thing on the plate that you think he MIGHT eat.

I promise you that this is pure manipulation on his part, brought about by you catering too much to his sweet tooth. Stop letting him do this. It's not good for him, and you do know that.

Good luck,
Dawn

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Give him some of what you're having and what you know he will eat.
Here's why:
-there taste buds are senstive and ever changing at this point
-what some parents make is too hot for a child & too complex (heavy
sauces instead of bland food they can handle)
-you want to expose him to new tastes but remember the key is for them
to EAT
-he's too young to fully understand food. Kids should never to got bed w/o food. I've never met an adult that could go to bed hungry and adults
have the "choice"
-he's young. His tates will change. What he will like today he will not necessarily like next year. At this age/stage it is completely normal for them to go through diff cycles of food choices.
-Hang in there and make sure you don't eat dinner too late. Some people eat dinner at 6, 7, or 8pm and their kids happen to be starving so they want to grab a quick snack. Shoot for 5pm. If nothing else, feed him then you can eat later.
-Remember young kids generally dislike complex flavors due to their ever changing, elementary tastebuds.
-Also, in my experience, the girls eat more & have a varied palate while the boys were more active seldom slowing down to eat and didn't have quite the varied palate.
-Never give him only what you are having and then "too bad" if he won't eat. That is not teaching your very young 2 yr old but instead it's a form of punishment that is not healthy.

Like I said, hang in there. He'll very slowly change. You will see small changes in him and he is still very young!

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

Give him what you eat with one thing on the side he will eat. Don't make mac, nuggets etc. It is a trap I wish I didn't get into. Make sure to include veg too.

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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

the whole key is to not to worry....he will eventually eat. :)

Please don't fall into the habit of being a short-order cook. Serve him what the rest of the family is eating. My rule of thumb was basing the required # of bites....on the child's age. So a 3yo has to take 3 bites of each food on the plate.

Another method I use for my daycare: most children have a fav food that they fill up on before touching anything else. That food is withheld until the least fav food is finished. The 18mo in our group prefers the main dish over the vegies. I serve her vegies 1st, & she sucks them down to get to her fav foods. Zero stress & the other kids love all of their food choices so it doesn't matter to them how I serve! Hope this helps...

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K.P.

answers from Seattle on

Give him a small plate of what the family is eating and sit him down at the table with the rest of the family and see if he will try it.
If not dont push too much because he is just starting out, just encourage him to try a bite of the foods first before you give him yogurt. Each night you just keep sitting him at the table and just keep up the encouragement. He will get used to sitting with the family, and will soon start to eat more, as he sees that is what he is supposed to do while watching everyone else set the example.

I had a bit of trouble with this awhile back but now my son is eating almost everything on his plate. Just have to be consistent. Also by limiting snacks right before dinner will help increase his appetite and make him want to actually eat what you give him.

Our son is also very into books, so we read him Green Eggs and Ham (encourages at least trying the food) right before dinner and that helped too. He connected the "you have to at least try before you say you dont like it" and now will (mostly) happily try new foods. Just a thought...

Good luck!

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A.B.

answers from Dallas on

I think it depends on what you are feeding the family. There are some foods kids just plain are not going to like...they don't have particularly sophisticated taste palettes. If your foods contain cilantro or lots of spices or if you're doing steamed broccoli, califlour or brussel sprouts, i may be not practical to expect that he's going to eat that.

If I were you, I'd give him a little bit of the things you think he should be willing to eat from the family meal and always have the family meal include a little bit of what your son likes to eat, too. Dinner at my house almost always includes apple slices or apple sauce and baby carrots. Prior to my daughter, I never would have served those items at dinner, but why should a family meal be all about what I like to eat without her likes taken into account? Your child is part of your family, so some what he likes to eat should be part of every family meal too.

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A.P.

answers from Janesville-Beloit on

We actually just talked to our pediatrician about this at our 2-year appointment, because our daughter has gotten much more selective about what she will eat, and would prefer to eat nothing to eating something she doesn't want to/doesn't like. Our dr recommended that we "pick our battles," and that this was probably not a battle to pick. So, how it goes at our house is we always give fruit and veggies first, then some of whatever main course we are eating, and then if she is still hungry we'll give her something healthy-ish that we know she will eat (yogurt, cheese, tortilla, peanut butter toast). We don't "make" her finish her veggies or main dish before getting something else, but we do casually encourage her and we praise her for trying new things. She's also finally getting to the age where she understands "sure, you can have something else, but first take one more bite of your green beans." She'll usually do it to get to the more desirable item, and I figure at least she's getting used to the taste of other things.
I don't know if we're doing it right, but it certainly makes mealtimes more enjoyable for all, and that was important to me. Good luck!

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L.G.

answers from Atlanta on

My toddler is also VERY picky. I dont cook twice. I fix him a tiny portion of what everyone is having. Mostly he wont eat anything at dinner except the meat. He dont like vegetables, bread or any type of pasta. Because of his picky eating habits, I give him several small snacks throughout the day. Some snacks are healthy and some are not so healthy. Because he dont eat vegetables, I give him vfusion juice. Or I sometimes make my own from spinach, carrots, a fresh fruit, orange and apple juice and a little sugar to sweeten it up. He love it, you cannot taste the vegetables in it at all. I also give him Flintstones First Vitamin to make up for anything he missed. His doctor said not to worry about it. Thats most toddlers are picky. But by age 3 his eating habits will probaby be be better. If he need to gain weight, try giving him the Pediasure or Ensure.

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