Just curious about everyone else's "guilty" moments of "Stop calling me mommy!" or "I'm not listening to you anymore!" "wait until your father gets home and ask him!" "just get to the point!" or general moments of feeling awful because the LAST name you want to be called is mommy.
Kids are fine, not even being crazy, but driving you crazy anyway?
I haven't been home this long since somebody was really sick and my kids were younger, but I left work a little before my due date this time. I'm exhausted, constantly cleaning, and feeling pressure to "do things" with the kids since I'm home. My oldest is going through the normal 4-year-old phase of simply talking ALL THE TIME. I am not really a talker and feel so bad that I'm so cranky and ready to not be pregnant that I keep snapping at him when he gets on a roll. Anybody else? I adore them and know it is just that I'm short of sleep, feel like a beached whale, haven't been able to exercise in months, and want the house clean before I go to the hospital. My husband works evenings so those are a long stretch for me. I hate sounding like a harpy with the kids and the weather is so borderline yucky that we can't play outside so we're all going nuts in here. Right now my toddler is [thankfully!!!] napping and my 4-year-old is happily playing in the corner pretending his construction vehicles are Transformers, so the only sounds are "ur-ur-ur" as they transform, but I'm waiting for the shrill "mommy!!!!!" followed by something along the lines of "do you know who this is? It's Wheeljack." (I DON'T CARE!) I feel like Pierre from the Maurice Sendak book. I want my brain control back. =)
I'm enjoying everyone's "stories." I'm very thankful my kids do not need me to play with them all the time, but they do want to engage me in conversation a lot. They are good boys. My husband and a friend of his are taking them to the Museum of Play today to give me a "break," so I'll try to be good and nap but will probably end up cleaning or washing the dishes. They will have a blast though. :)
Thanks for the replies!! Martha, I like standing in long lines at the grocery store with people fumbling with change or food vouchers and just smile and sigh and am generally pleased because I'm alone and just standing there. (If I shop on my lunch break from work.)
I went so far as to say my name wasn't mommy anymore--my 4-year-old almost started crying and said "But what am I going to call you??? I love your name mommy!" and then just a few minutes ago he got this adorable look on his face and said, "Mommy, I'm excited its you. Are you excited its us again?" I think the hot bath, candles, a trashy book, and a cup of tea sounds awesome tonight. My husband keeps trying to get me to sleep instead of clean right now so maybe I'll turn in early. =)
I think the kids are also kind of weirded out that I've been home for a full week now. They're used to just daddy during the days and mommy in the evenings and on the weekends. :)
I've been there before. Usually, at night when I'm ready to shut down for the evening...LOL Or my kids love asking lots of questions. I have 5 kids too and only 3 ask questions but it's never ending. I answer a few questions each then say no more questions and send them to play... Hang in there and congratulations!!
What really gets me is when my kids are playing "house." Someone is Mommy, someone is Daddy and someone is Baby. All baby does the whole time is call for "MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY." It drives me absolutely insane. I end up answering them just to be told, "NO, not you Emily's Mommy." They are still allowed to play the game but not say Mommy. They have to pretend that they are a different family and everyone has to call each other by first names. Ahhhh...finally a nice moment while I get to relax. That is until my 3 year old who speaks fairly well comes up to me and asks me a million questions, most of which I DON'T UNDERSTAND! That really upsets her and makes me feel like pulling my hair out.
Just wanted you to know you are not alone!
I love going to the doctor or the dentist, and I never, ever switch because they leave me waiting for a long time in the room. I am the only one in our family who sees this GP, and it is because he is always, always, always running late. Why? Because I can sit and read a magazine, even about motorcycles...and nobody calls me "Mom." When they applogize for keeping me waiting, I tell them that I don't mind, but if they call me Mom, I will have to hurt them...
You are not alone. I hope that the last of your pregnacy goes by fast, and that you get the house the way you want it before the baby comes.
Best wishes,
M.
OK, so your kids are much younger. But I did have a friend once whose kids were older. . . . 8-9? I don't remember.
Anyway, what I DO remember is that her son came to her and said, "mom. . . ." She turned to him and said, "I'm sorry. You were only allowed 36 (or whatever number) of "mom's" allowed in one day. You've hit 37 and I can not answer your question at this time." She said her son was just dumb-struck and walked away. Apparently it's wasn't life-threateneing or he would have said so.
I know you have replyed but...have you seen the advertisement for The Family Guy? The "baby" sits and says, "Mom, Mom, mom,mommy, mum, mummy mom Mommy, mom, MOMMY, MUM, MOOOMMY..." she FINALLY SCREAMS, 'WHAT!!!???" he says, "hi'......and runs off.
Heehee!! me and my sister used to do this simply to get OUR mother to come turn the light off!!!!!
Are you in my head, because these are the EXACT thoughts and feelings I have with my 3 year old!!! And I too am pregnant. I stay home with him, except when he is in preschool a few VERY short hours a week. I love him dearly, but I anxiously await the moment my husband walks in the door everyday. And lately he has had to work later than normal and i have literally been going out of my mind! My son wakes me up at 6:30 am talking about superhero's and handing me one as he climbs into my bed so they can 'fight'. Then its, "mommy, what guy do you want to be" and we pretend to be different superhero's, or animals, or whatever else we can pretend to be- and he won't respond to his name, instead "no, i'm optimus prime", for example. I love that he has such an imagination, but I just want a few minutes that he will leave me alone!! This is allll day long and its absolutely exhausting. I'm vacuuming and he keeps talking to me, then gets mad when i don't respond so I have to turn off the vacuum, over and over.....
So no you are certainly not alone, and thanks for letting me vent a little too!
I try not to snap at him though. I have to tell myself he is just a little kid and thinks the world of his M.. And although I could give 2 $hits less about Transformers, or dinosaurs, or what ever else, He loves them. So I do take some time out to play with him and go along with whatever scenario he has come up with. I also, explain to him that sometimes I have to do other things, but I will play when I am done. I may have to remind him of that a few times while i'm doing the other things, but as long as I do in fact play with him when I am done, it usually works. And then I get a few minutes to myself.
Bummer you can't workout though, because that is some of my favorite me time. I put my son in the gym daycare and go relieve some stress.
Hang in there!
Oh YES... it gets tiring!
You are not the only one!
My kids are now 4 and 8.
Since they could talk, they call me all the time.
They call ME, not Daddy.
I tell them, "You can call DADDY too. HE can do things too. Or when Mommy is busy..."
They tell me "But Daddy is busy." I say "Mommy is busy too." They say "But you know how to do everything and how we like it..."
Plus, my kids have trumpet voices. Their voices are naturally loud. They can't help it.
And my ears are sensitive. By the end of the day, I swear, my ears are FULL already.
But one day, they will not need you nor call you.
But int he meantime, yes it is tiring and can be stressful.
Kids.
I have taught my kids something though. I tell them "It is Mommy's quiet time.... My ears are full. Can you please lower your voices." I also tell them "Problem-solve first. You know how... then ask me if you can't."
We and they, sound like a broken record.
Your 4 year old boy, sounds like MY 4 year old boy! My 4 year old boy, is the MOST talkative one in our family! And to think he had a speech delay when he was younger! Eeeek!
Plus, I am a SAHM. So I hear this all day.
I don't get a break. Not even after my Husband gets home from work.
Oh well.
When I was preggers with my 2nd child, my eldest was 3 and turned 4 shortly after I had my son.
I explained to her, that Mommy needs to rest. Mommy need to nap, too. Mommy needs some quiet etc.
She understood. I said it in a way that was kind... so that she would understand, and not feel jilted.
With my talkative son, I have been guilty of actually telling him "Can you please not talk now? Mommy's ears are full!"'
My son is napping now.
Sigh.
Quiet.
My daughter is reading.
Quiet.
Sigh.
Sometimes, I cannot even think, even for 1 nanosecond, because they call me so much and are always talking to me! My brain, goes haywire. Then I forget why I even went to a particular room. My brain, just short circuits.
But gee, I just adore my kids, and LOVE that they are so verbally articulate and expressive. Just the way that I raise them to be.
;)
all the best,
Susan
Haha, aww you poor thing! I feel for you, you sound like you need a serious break.
Hang in there, everything is just so crazy that you cant catch a sane moment.
Once everyone else is to fed and off to bed, light some candles, get your favorite book or magazine, a drink and have a nice warm bath to relax. Maybe awhile soaking in the water with the lights down dim will ease your mind and you will feel better.
Dont sweat the small stuff, and try not to stress. Things will get better!
Hugs and support to you!
:Mommy is not available right now. Please leave a message and she will get back to you as soon as possible. Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep....."
They usually look at me like I've lost my mind but it buys me a few more minutes of blessed quiet! Oh how I love my kiddos - oh how I would love a day of absolute pure quiet - no voices at all!!!!
SOOO NORMAL! Just hang in there!
would you rather mommy mommy mommy or no no no ???? :) you wont get brain control back till you move them out. :) hang in there when one kid gets out of this phase another will start you have 2 more times of this :)
I was just thinking a couple of hours ago, "Why does every comment or question have to start with Mommy?!"
We call it "the mommy alarm." Yes, I do get annoyed and feel shivers run down my spine when I hear the "mommy alarm" or hubby calling. Why, because it always seems to be right when I'm in the middle of something or sitting down to eat. I finally figured out that the best way to slow down the number of times/day the alarm goes off by telling my son he has to come to me before he can utter the word, "Mom!" unless someone or something is dying or hurt. You'd be surprised how much trouble it is for them to leave what they are doing. MIL didn't like this, because she's a traditionalist, but too bad. It trains them in how to take care of themselves. As for hubby, I've started telling him "I'm busy."
My oldest has the habit (even still at 10 y/o) of saying "mommy..." before she says anything to me. ANYTHING. Even in the middle of a convo. "Mommy." (wait for me to respond)...(question)...(my reply)..."Mommy"...(statement)..."oh and mommy"...(another statement). It goes on like this all day long. I've said to her plenty of times that she doens't need to say mommy every single time she's talking to me, especially when we're already engaged in a conversation...and there's no one else even around us, lol. Nope, she still does it.
Aaack! So totally normal! Have a friend over for a playdate - 10-11:30am each day - so your 4 year old can talk to someone else - like another 4 year old! I did this when I was new in town. I got on the phone on Sunday evenings and made playdates for us for every day. That way we had something small to do each day, it gave us social time and a schedule and a way to break up the day.
Totally understand, it can drive you nuts sometimes. but then think about the pain you could be causing to your little one by telling him you're "not mommy" or you "don't care" or to go get lost. Rejection can be the worst thing for a child and the child will sense it from you and it will affect the child's self-esteem. When I get annoyed like that, I think about putting the child's interest before mine, and how I am thankful to God for being able to have children (also pregnant with no 2 right now) that are healthy and talkative, and without problems like down syndrome or ADD, and then think about what I would do with myself if, God forbid, the day came when something happened to my little one and she wasn't there to go "mommy mommy mommy..." all the time. I couldn't live without it. So just hang in there, soon they'll be grown up enough where they'll be walking 5 feet in front or behind you, disowning you as a parent.....:o)
Yeah sometimes I wish I could change my name! LOL. I love my daughter to death but sometimes she can really get on my nerves. Thankfully we put her in the 3 yr old group of preschool and I really do welcome the peace and quiet. And then I find myself in a rush to go get her in the afternoon. Go figure! LOL!!!
Oh my goodness, no kidding. Just yesterday we were driving to the market, all four of us, on a rainy day. "Mommy..." "Yes?" "blah blah blah" Seconds later..."Mommy?" "Yes?" "Blah blah" seconds later, "Mommy?" Me:"Um, sweetie, can you just call me S.????" "No, you are mommy". I turned to my husband and said, "Let's count how many mommies we get in the next hour. Then we'll count how many daddies we get." I thought, is this just a phase with my three and a half year old? I hope so, because if my one year old can start "mommy-ing" me before my 3 1/2 year old stops, it would double!!! I'm almost having a panic attack just thinking about it. Love them. Love being mom. But sometimes I've had enough of the whiney "mommy..."
I'm guilty of telling DD that I'm changing my name! Once I "changed" it to Philomina (because I thought she wouldn't be able to pronouce it! LOL) but she just cried and said she wanted her mommy back. Of course I did.
Then, I told her another time, that I'm just going to tweak it to Momooooo just for a change! LOL Now every once in a while if I don't respond to the incessant, "Mooommy...mommmy.....mommy....mooooommmmyyyy" She'll call, "Momoooo" LOL and I can't help but laugh!
All in all, Mommy is the best title I could ever want...but once in a while...can't help but wish for a break! =0)
OH let me tell you, I about cried this morning when I couldn't even take a shower without someone yelling "MOMMY!" or "Hun??! You done yet, hun?" (husband gets in on the annoyance too!) I seriously couldn't even get ready for the day in peace and quiet!!
Sometimes I fantasize about checking into a hotel ALONE! For an entire weekend!!!
Lynsey
Yes Yes and Yes..... My son is 4 and CONSTANTLY talking about ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING...... I feel guilty also but I'm just soooooo over it sometimes....... There little minds are just CONSTANTLY going and my son (only child) wants me to do everything with him.... He's DEFINITELY not one of those children that can entertain himself..... Don't worry, your not alone~ And don't feel bad, my friends get the same way with there kids.. We're human~
PS "Bee's Mom" is my situation all the time... funny~
Yes, we all have those days... usually it happens with me when my two give me about 10 "Mommy Requests" over the course of 60 seconds!
