Thumb sucking...Help

Updated on September 13, 2009
D.W. asks from Irving, TX
26 answers

Other than the obvious "he will grow out of it" answer. Has anyone had a problem with their 2yr old sucking their thumb? My 4 and 12 year old never did this. But I can't seem to get my 2yr old to stop. It is driving me crazy because I know he is ruining his palate and teeth. Any suggestions?

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S.F.

answers from Dallas on

I found some stuff called "Stop Bite" that I got at Walmart. It's like clear fingernail polish that you paint on his thumb nail and it tastes aweful - I know because I tried it! But after I put it on (and it dried), he put his thumb in his mouth once, thought about it once, and never did it again. That was it. No trauma - no tantrums. Nothing. I realize I'm probably very lucky, but it worked for us. It's in a black and red box and primarily to stop biting nails but says on the box also to stop thumb-sucking. Good luck!

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E.O.

answers from Amarillo on

My daughter sucked her thumb from 10 months to 3 years, and we tried everything....putting foul tasting liquids, gloves, you name it. It got so bad her lips were cracking and she had calouses on her thumbs. Her teeth were poking out. Finally we tried ignoring it. Not bring it up to her, nothing. If I walked by and she had it in her mouth I would just pull it out and not say a word. She already knew we didn't want her to do it! One day she just stopped. Never did it again, and her teeth have actually gone back to normal!

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G.A.

answers from Dallas on

cVS has some stuff to put on it that tastes nasty. Bite no or something like that. My granddaughter uses is to not bite her nails. When she puts it on. G. W

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A.R.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter sucked her thumb in-utero until she was 5. Every time we set a goal to quit she just said she couldn't, she wanted to but she couldn't. We looked at the thumbguard someone posted, but it was hard plastic, looked irritating, and our pre-school teachers had seen several kids suck their thumb with one on!
We finally ended up using the handaid, www.yourhandaid.com

It's made of a soft suede type material and you get two so you have a backup if you need to wash one. My daughter wore it for the full 6 weeks (removing only to swim & bathe)and hasn't sucked her thumb since. I wish we had done it earlier, it worked soo well!

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

I have a 2 year old who also loves his thumb. I think it is pretty cute most times and really gross at other times - like after leaving the park. I realize he likes it for comfort, but if I see him sucking his thumb out of boredom or lack of something to do with his hands (while driving to school, reading a story, etc) vs. comfort/bed time. I do things to get him involved. Like ask questions about the story that gets his thumb out of the mouth and him talking. We also play a game called 'Where's your face' I know, silly, but it works. I ask "Where's your face?" and he pulls his thumb out of his mouth and smiles at me. Background: I told him one day that I loved seeing his smile and when he sucks his thumb, I can't see his smile or his little face.

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

The more you make of it, the more he will do it. Ignore it. I sucked my thumb until I was 5 and have perfectly straight teeth and have never had braces, so you can't automatically assume it will ruin his teeth. Save your concerns for the big stuff.

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D.C.

answers from Dallas on

Love him and leave the thumb sucking alone. Try to observe when he does it the most and if it is stress-related try to let off some of that stress. If it is fatigue-related address that directly with a calm earlier bedtime or a short nap. My son is over 40. He sucked his thumb for a long time after everyone said he should stop. His teeth and palate were perfect until a horrible bike accident when he was ten. Even then, after surgery everything healed perfectly. I am convinced we and well-meaning family and friends did more damage with their comments and attempts to make him stop.

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B.S.

answers from Dallas on

Just FYI...our oldest son was the only one of our three that sucked his thumb, but also the only one that did NOT need braces. I think it starts as a "pacifier" then just becomes habit. We tried everything to help our son quit. But it really didn't happen until he got the "want to." (just before he started kindergarten)

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S.H.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter sucked her thumb until she was 4, mostly just in the car and when she was tired. But we just started talking about how big girls don't suck there thumbs and when she turned 4 she would be a big girl so she couldn't suck her thumb anymore. So far it has worked. Every once in a while when she is really tired I see her with it in her mouth and I tell her to take it out and she does. She would even tell people that when she turned 4 she couldn't suck her thumb anymore. It made it feel like it was just part of growing up.
But there is a thing you can get I believe from a dentist that you put on their hand that can keep them from sucking their thumb. It keeps them from being able to latch on. There is also some really nasty tasting nail polish I believe by Sally Hansen that can help as well. Some people say it doesn't work some say it does. That was what we were going to try if she didn't stop on her own.
I hope that helps.

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G.W.

answers from Dallas on

I don't know if your son is too young for this, but maybe have his "hero" call him on the phone and tell him that he/she wants your son to try to stop sucking his thumb.

I know as a kid (and adult) I bit my nails. I never really got over it until an adult saw them one day and made me feel ashamed and embarrassed. It was kinda humiliating, something I would never do to a child, but it really was the ONE thing that caused me to really want to stop biting my nails.

Maybe if your son is motivated by Thomas the Tank Engine or Spiderman or Elmo, that "person" could tell him that THEY don't bite their nails and neither do big boys.

??? hope that helps! Good luck!

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A.L.

answers from Dallas on

I have a thumb sucker and have not minded it. She is 2 now and unlike other parents that were woke up because baby lost passi, we did not have those issues - can't lose your thumb. :-) I think there are worse things and that our kids will stop when they are ready.

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S.L.

answers from Dallas on

my 5 yr old still does it and his teeth are fine. the dentist isn't worried and neither am i. he does it less and less as he gets older.

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C.C.

answers from Dallas on

Two of my three were thumb suckers, and I will say they didn't naturally grow out of it -- but they needed to be mentally prepared to stop and that didn't happen at two years old. For your son, the thumb is his comfort item -- like a "blankie" or favorite stuffed animal. He is not going to stop at age 2 and you shouldn't expect him to.

My eldest daughter stopped (the first time) when she was 4, but start again about 5 months later when her little sister was born. It took a couple of more years to get her to completely stop. At that age, she only did it in her sleep which was the hardest thing to stop.

My second daughter also sucked her thumb. She was about 5 when she completely gave up the habit.

Did I like it? No! Did I need to cause myself and my children unnecessary stress over it! Double NO!

Did both my girls wind up needing braces? Yes! The oldest one was most likely because of her thumb sucking, but not my other daughter -- they sucked their thumbs differently (so I'm told) and it didn't create problems for her.

Your son is not necessarily ruining his teeth, and highly unlikely his palate. Neither of my daughters had any palate issues (funny thing is their cousin did, yet she didn't suck her thumb!).

I use to stress out about it with my oldest, but in the end learned to relax.

Your son may not "grow out of it" but he needs to be mentally ready to give it up so that your efforts are successful with minimal stress.

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T.C.

answers from Dallas on

Weelll... this is NOT what you want to hear, but... My DAD woke my MOM up and asked her why she had her thumb in her mouth in the middle of the night, not long after they were married. She was 18. Thumbsucking can be a really ingrained part of a person. My daughter was sucking hers in her ultrasound, and continued until she was nine. At that time she only did it at night or in the car when she fell asleep. At nine, she wanted to sleep over at friends houses and was embarrassed. We'd tried all the tricks, Bandaids, hotsauce, thumb-Stop, bitter polish... etc. However, until SHE decided she didn't want to do it anymore nothing worked. For several weeks, she'd push her thumb under her pillow so it wasn't in her mouth as she went to sleep, but she'd wake up mad because it was in her mouth in the morning. Finally though, she broke herself and didn't slip anymore. She did go through braces, and now has a beautiful smile. Don't stress. There are worse things. Do what you can to encourage the habit to diminish. Hopefully, it'll diminish to extintion. BUT; don't fret something you can't change.

One thing that DID help break the during-the-day sucking was gloves. Maybe if you have him wear gloves aLOT as the weather gets cold he'll lessen his desire to suck on his thumb. My daughter didn't like the texture of the gloves and it just broke that train of thought and she went on to something else. And, yes, sometimes she just took the glove off... but usually she didn't realize what she was doing and it was simply out of habit.
:-)

T.

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K.F.

answers from Dallas on

Both my kids are/were big thumb suckers, and I gotta say, I take my oldest to the dentist regularly and her teeth are just fine. I think 2 might be too young to "get it" (I have a 2 year old, and honestly she's young enough that the thumb doesn't bother me much). It was about 3 1/2 or 4 that I'd had enough of my oldest sucking her thumb and I started making her only suck it in her room. She was welcome to do so any time, she just had to go into her room to do it. We didn't fight or fuss, I just reminded her if I saw her doing it and often she'd choose to stop (she is very strong willed so it was good to give her a choice). If she still needed the comfort, she could go get it. As she got a little older we switched it to only bedtime and now the habit is gone.

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L.P.

answers from Dallas on

Actually, the "ruining his palate and teeth" part is not a foregone conclusion. That's still very much up for debate amongst the experts, and from personal experience I can tell you that that is definitely not the case for my family - both me & my siblings and with my kids & nieces & nephews.

But in any case, if you really want to encourage him to stop, understand that reasoning or bargaining with a 2-year-old is not going to work; his brain does not function like yours. Trust me, when he's cranky or tired or just wants some comfort, his future dental health is not going to outweigh that urge!:D

My mom did this with me: she set a goal, and talked about how 4-year-olds are WAY too big to suck thumbs - isn't that AWESOME? Yay! Like that. She never EVER made me feel bad about wanting or needing it and never got into a power struggle with me over it, just planted the seed and discussed it plenty. Also, I had a ready answer for any nosy grownups who asked "when are you going to stop sucking your thumb?" I always proudly answered "When I'm four!". And sure enough, when I was 3.9999 yrs old I did stop.

Since this is an established comfort for him, making him feel guilty will only hurt him. Start an encouraging campaign, and I think you'll see results - not instantly, but peacefully & healthily. He can feel proud rather than as if his coping mechanism has been taken away suddenly.

Good luck!

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R.V.

answers from Dallas on

Hello D.,
My daughter who is 19 now sucked her thumb till she was 11 yrs old.. and of cource was always in denial that she did it.. I thought it was so cute and silly but she left the habit all by herself and now we just joke about it... her thumb is pretty and nice with no after effects but my other friends just put cayenne pepper or anything bitter they can think of to ward the kid off but I think it's totally your personal choice....

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

My son is almost 4, he has been a thumb sucker since he was able to find his thumb. I worried too, but as he has gotten older, he does it less and less. I am hoping he will just grow out of it on his own and he seems headed in that direction. My BIL is about to graduate dental school. He says it's really only an "issue" for most kids at around five. He suggests an ace bandage around the elbow - it's cheap and will make it less comfortable when he bends his arm. He also mentioned that this trick will most likely only stop nighttime habits...it the day light they will figure out how to escape. There is also a dental apparatus that can be affixed to the roof of the mouth that will make it harder to suck his thumb. I wouldn't worry about it. It may annoy you and concern you, but right now it is way of self soothing (I know it did me!). Good luck.

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C.D.

answers from Sherman on

Has your dentist expressed a concern that his thumb sucking is having a negative effect on his teeth? His pediatrician? If not, then I would ask why the need to push for stopping.

Kids self-soothe in lots of different ways, and he has found a way that works great. You might consider putting some boundaries around it, like only when at home, only in his room, at naptime and bedtime, etc.

As a former thumb sucker (who by the way, had no issues with my teeth from it), my parents gave me an amazing gift by letting me choose when to stop.

Food for thought.

C., mom of 2, ages 4 and 6

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G.S.

answers from Dallas on

My oldest son sucked his thumb, mostly at night going to bed or when he felt bad. We got in the routine of my reading him a book until he fell asleep and then all of a sudden when he turned 4, he stopped. He is now 51 years old and his teeth were not harmed so my advice to you would be - Don't make a big deal of it. The more you fret about it the more likely the child will be to continue. By the way, he is the only one of my 3 children that sucked his thumb. Your little one finds security in it's thumb.

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K.F.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter is 4 1/2 and still sucks her thumb. I can tell she only does it when she is tired or upset. At night, she goes to sleep with it, but it falls out soon so she does not suck it all night. We asked our doctor when she was two and he said to completely ignore it. Her dentist at three said it was ok as well. Your two year old is probably to young. If that is their "comfort" do you really want to take it away yet?

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A.D.

answers from Dallas on

At 2 I wouldn't consider it a problem and you can't reason with a 2 year old, so let it go for now. I know it's not what you want to hear, but I'd rather see a 2 year old walking around with a thumb in his mouth than a paci. Start engaging him in other activities when you see him doing it- sometimes it's out of boredom. Other times it could be because he's nervous and it's his way of comforting himself. We've limited it to sleepiness and or nervousness for my 3 1/2 year old son and he's done a good job with it but he was almost 3 when we really started pushing that he didn't need his thumb all the time. He also tends to suck his thumb when he has his favorite stuffed animal around so that now stays in his bed all day. He tucks him in each morning after breakfast.
As far as his teeth the dentist says his mouth is fine from the thumb sucking- he just has the unfortunate luck of having teeth like my husband and I both did and will probably need braces in the future because of genetics.

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N.C.

answers from Dallas on

one of the kids i taught in school was 5 and she had the same problem. the dr. told them to make her wear gloves while she slept. gloves with things on them...like finger puppets. that or we'd make sure she had band aides on her thumbs as well.

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A.B.

answers from Dallas on

My son stopped right about when he turned five with no perm damage to his teeth. 5 is the age limit his dentist set before having to do drastic measures. His mouth/teeth looked great at his last appt after 6 months of no thumb sucking. When it IS time to stop, start by limiting to just bed time...and set a goal..."when you're 4, you won't want that thumb anymore". For now, I think it's important to let him soothe himself. Good luck to you both!

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S.P.

answers from Dallas on

Funny you should post this. This is an issue my own DH and I disagree on. I don't feel it is a big deal. He does. Our DD is 4 years old as of June. In compromise with my DH- we chose to limit when she could have a blanket (which is how she sucks her thumb-with a blanket) to bed times, naps-illness-injury and other times when she needs to self-sooth. Typically not taking it with us through the day anymore.

Sometimes she needs it more than others-sometimes she doesn't seem to need it at all. Just lastnight we couldn't find a single one of her blankets (it was unintentional) but she didn't ask for one either and went all night without the need for her blanket or for sucking her thumb which is simply astounding to me since she just began preschool again and new she'd be going to the dr. today for shots. (Four.)

So far she hasn't asked for one at this point either but I don't think it is a big deal if they DO suck their thumb. I've heard like everyone else that it can mess up their teeth but I'm starting to wonder if this is a myth. Her teeth are fine and I've yet to ever meet anyone who had dental issues BECAUSE they sucked their thumb. Seriously! I have an older daughter. My own younger brother sucked his thumb but I can't remember him doing it past age 5 at the most...

If a kid needs it past then-then hey-what a simple self soother! Think of what us adults do to self-soothe. We over eat-chew our nails-shop-smoke-or something worse. When I stood on the scale this morning I wished I just sucked my thumb when I got upset. Sill though I'd look-maybe I'd weigh less and be comforted at the same time. Sigh. Just a silly thought.

2 is still very little. Please don't sweat the small stuff!

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T.J.

answers from Dallas on

I'm not sure if this will work for your child but it was a miracle cure for mine. We bought a thumb guard from our dentist (you can also buy them on-line http://www.thumbguard.com/Thumbguard.html). She stopped sucking her thumb within the week, less actually. It was unbelievable because my daughter was a 24/7 sucker. She LOVED her thumb. She'd try to talk with her thumb in, it was crazy! I don't know if she was just mentally ready at about 3 1/2 (although she showed no signs of that) or what but I was amazed how she responded to the thumb guard. It's worth a try!! Good luck!

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