Thumb-sucker

Updated on September 02, 2008
M.W. asks from Yorktown, VA
11 answers

My son is 12 years old (almost 13) and still sucks his thumb. He has had braces already and a couple of retainers, plus headgear to try to stop him from sucking his thumb. We have even tried having him wear a batting glove!! The ortho says there is not much more they can do right now until he quits. Does anyone know or have any home remedies to get him to stop?

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So What Happened?

Thank you to everyone that replied about my son's thumb-sucking habit. I've decided to stop hounding him about it and just let him quit on his own (hopefully)!! I never really thought about it as a habit...and I know how hard it is to quit a habit (I've quit smoking twice!!). He also has an orthodontist appointment coming up and maybe they can talk some sense into him as well. Thanks again!!

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S.S.

answers from Washington DC on

You already got a lot of good advice!!
I sucked my thumb until I was 26 and my teeth are fine! True, I had baces, but that is because my lower jaw is way too far out (genetic thing), anyway neither the retainer nor the braces stopped me from sucking my thumb- it was my mind that decided not to do it anymore!
So talk to him and tell him, that it is his desicion- he'll understand!

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T.J.

answers from Washington DC on

I sucked my thumb until I was 14 years old and the only reason I stopped was because I wanted to, not because anyone else wanted me to. The more you push, the more he will suck. He is old enough to know all the reasons he should not be sucking his thumb, but now it is up to him. A lot of people have bad oral habits...nail biting, smoking, chewing gum, chewing straws, etc. and everyone has to learn how to stop these habits some way or another and some never do. What helped me was putting a rubber band around my wrist and every time my thumb went in my mouth I snapped it (not hard, just enough to remind me I was doing something I did not want to). I came up with this after watching Oprah at 14 years old!
Perhaps you can say to him, son when you are ready to try to stop sucking your thumb is a strategy that worked for someone just about your age. Good luck

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S.W.

answers from Norfolk on

The worst thing to do is try stopping him. My brother who is 41 years old still sucks his thumb, my 23 year old and my 11 year old neice do. It is a security thing for him. If you have tried the mouth gaurds there really isn't anything else you can do.

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C.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I think the more you call attention to this behavior, the more he will do it. I would suggest you ignore it. Some boys still need a security object, and the more you make a big deal of it, the more of a desire it will be. My brother used to sleep with a purple bunny when he was a teenager, I remember my father had hidden it and he found it each night and hid it each morning. You could tell him he won't get braces until he stops and braces are harder on teens and leave it at that. Or, you could do what I did with my 4 yo when we needed to get rid of the binky, it cost me an expensive build a bear, so you could give him some reward. Good luck.

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S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

The thing that got me to quit sucking my thumb at 9 was using an ace bandage around my elbow. It kept me from easily being able to bend my arm to put my thumb in my mouth. For a few nights I tried to force it so I could suck my thumb, ended up with my arm going numb and gave up. The ace bandage also helped so that when I stirred in the night and was not awake enough to remember not to suck my thumb that my thumb wouldn't make it to my face.

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E.T.

answers from Washington DC on

Have you considered asking your son why he still sucks his thumb or whether he wants to quit. Really, he is plenty old where you can have the conversation with him. I am sure he knows he is messing up his teeth.

I have a friend who sucked her thumb through highschool in secret. The more you push, the more he may need the security that comes from sucking his thumb. Her parents made a big deal of it and it pushed her to hiding it.

My parents made a big deal of it and I hid it until I quit at age 9. I remember it being very stressful being told to quit when that was how I went to sleep.

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C.A.

answers from Washington DC on

I agree with Erin's suggestion that you talk with your son. I assume that the thumb-sucking is a self-soothing reflex; engage him in the process of finding a suitable replacement. One out-of-the-box idea is to find a meditation CD that he can listen to. If he can create a habit of listening to it regularly, e.g., at bedtime, that may help his unconscious mind find a different way of handling anxiety. Meditainment.com has some good CDs; I've listened to one that was a guided meditation of swimming with the whales. Let him check out the list to see if any specific meditations appeal to him.

C.

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M.W.

answers from Roanoke on

Wait until he is a teenager. I sucked mine until I was 16!!! I got braces at 14, they took them off because I wouldn't stop. I was so afraid that my teeth would go buck again that I never sucked them again once they took the braces off. I just didn't want to be made fun of ever again. He'll get sick of mean kids calling him beaver and so on. M.

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J.F.

answers from Richmond on

My daughter (another Erin) just turned 8 and is about to get braces because her teeth are out of whack from sucking her thumb. She was pretty much born with her thumb in her mouth, you could even see her sucking her thumb in the ultrasound before she was even born. We've had conversations with her about it, she knows she's damaging her teeth and genuinely wants to kick the habit. She does fine throughout the day, but can't seem to stop sucking her thumb while she's asleep. That really can't be helped. We tried the ace bandage around the elbow, socks and gloves on her hands at bedtime, playing cd's, painting her thumbnails with nasty tasting stuff of all sorts...none of it has worked. Our last hope is that the braces will finally do the trick and stop the habit for good. Otherwise, it's just something she's going to have to grow out of. Just try not to make your son feel too badly about it. He's old enough to understand the consequences of the habit and has to make his own decision to stop. Habits are hard to break for everybody. Just let him know you're there to help him in any way you can. You might even ask him if he has any ideas that might help him stop. Kids are good at thinking out of the box.

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S.K.

answers from Washington DC on

Wow, this was something I was about to write in about, only my girl is not quite five. I'm going to try the music from her and check out Meditainment.com for myself!

My husband is badgering her about quiting and I don't think it's helping. He told her she shouldn't suck her thumb at night anymore on night recently. I think she took him seriously and tried not to, but when I went up to check on her around ten, (she's usually out like a light 20 min after we leave the room) she was still wide awake and anxious and asking which thumb she could suck.

I think Erin T's on to something and I'm going to try her suggestion with Erin (my girl), too. Bad tasting things on their thumbs (and batting gloves!) are all well and good, but it still doesn't take care of the reason they're doing it in the first place.

*sigh* Uphill battle for both of us. Good luck to you and wish me luck, too!

-S. K

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A.W.

answers from Washington DC on

At this point it is a habit and until they find something else to do they will continue. I would equate it to biting your nails...

I always have twirled my hair since I can remember and I do recall one teacher in school that was really bothered by it. She always drew my attention to it when I did it because it really was an uncontious habit. Since she pointed it out all the time I was able to be more concious of it when I was around her and did not do it in her class. I think it is possible for him to stop but he probably need to figure out what is triggering it and work on substituting something else instead.

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