The Quest for Sleep Longer than 3Hrs at a Time

Updated on November 10, 2008
B.S. asks from Nashville, TN
22 answers

Hi Mommys, I am a 1st time mommy of a 10week little princess. I am having a difficult time finding a way to get her to stay awake during the day (pleasently) and to sleep longer that 3hr intervals at night, she weighs over 13lbs and Ive read that she has the abillity to do so now but she will not. I have recently transitioned from co sleeping to her crib and that has gone well. I breast feed and give formula, she was colicy untill we figured out that she has a milk protien allergy. I went off dairy and pumped/dumped while giving formula (Alimentum) at first. now I do about half and half. I am against giving cereal in her bottle, but am open to all other suggestions. Thank you and please forgive my typos and spelling as I am tuping one handed!

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J.E.

answers from Memphis on

Just like someone else suggested, I read the Baby Wise book and it really helped. I was able to get my daughter on a schedule and she was sleeping through the night by 8 weeks! It really offers great advice...I followed it as a basis for creating a schedule and along with my own judgement, everything went smoothly and all of us got plenty of sleep which is very important for both baby and Mommy.
Good Luck!

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J.M.

answers from Memphis on

At 10 weeks that's just how much sleep you get for most babies, be glad its 3 hrs instead of every 2hrs like my second son. I didn't get more than 4hrs at a time until he was 8mths.

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D.P.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi B.,
At her age, she should be taking 3 naps a day (morning,afternoon, evening) ranging from about 1 1/2 -2 hours or so (sometimes longer). Then at night, it can range. Sleeping through the night is really just sleeping uninterrupted for 5 hours, and she will probably get there eventually. But for now, she is still so young it may be too much to expect. It could be that a wet diaper is waking her, or she just needs that extra nourishment. True most babies will start sleeping longer stretches, but when that happens is different for all babies.
If you think she has day/night confusion (sleeping ALL day long), the best thing to do is the put her in a sunny window and carry on about business as usual during the day- vacuuming, TV or radio on, etc. But make sure those nap times are sacred and be at home where she can nap. You want to start a pattern early and babies thrive on a routine.

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S.D.

answers from Nashville on

None of my 4 babies slept more than 3 hours at a time until they were at least 6 months old and my oldest son was starving all the time and he woke up every 3 hours until he was a year old. This is what we did. I nursed the baby at bedtime and put the baby in the crib. When the baby woke up in the middle of the night I would put the baby in bed with us and fall back to sleep while the baby nursed. The baby would make sweet little sounds and wake me up to switch sides. Then the baby would gently fall to sleep when his/her tummy was full. Sometimes I would wake up when the baby fell asleep and my hubby would put the baby back in the crib. Other times I would wake up in the morning and nurse the baby again before I took a shower and my hubby would put the baby back in the crib while we got ready for work. I would suggest that you stop trying to get the baby to sleep more than 3 hours at a time. Babies wake up when they are hungry and sleep when they are tired. Just let the baby get on her own natural little schedule, nurse the baby on demand when she is hungry, and you will have a happier baby.

C.R.

answers from Charleston on

At 10 weeks old, she needs a-lot of sleep. And, if she is like my little one, she won't sleep longer than that for awhile. All children are different in this respect. Occasionally, I get about 5 hours of sleep during the night. He is also a 40 minute napper during the day... not hour and a half like the other 'dream' children that I hear about. I will tell you that if they don't sleep enough, their bodies will start to feel like they don't need it and will sleep less. In other words, the more they sleep, the more they will sleep. Unfortunately, they will continue to wake when they are hungry or uncomfortable. You could always do what I did/do... nap with them. Sounds like you are doing everything right so far, but I know plenty of little ones who don't sleep through the night (6 hours) for awhile. It does get frustrating, but soooo worth it. Have fun.

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R.D.

answers from Jackson on

Congrats on the baby girl! I know it is tough trying to get sleep with a nb, but at 10 weeks she might not be ready to sleep longer than 3 hours at a time...age and weight don't have much to do with it. Like other mamas said, each child is different. My first slept through the night at 3 months of age. My second started sleeping through the night at 6 1/2 months of age! Nothing I did would make him sleep longer. I just had to accept it. This phase will pass and she will start sleeping through the night...I promise. What ever you do do not put rice in her bottle. This does not help. If she is not ready for it it will upset her tummy. Even after introducing rice to my youngest he still woke up during the night...I fed it too him with a spoon, did not put in his bottle (he was nursed). One morning you will wake up and think, "Wow, she did not wake up last night." and be happy. Just remember that when they start sleeping through the night they can just as easliy go back to the old ways and wake up again...it just take time and patience. HTH!

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A.J.

answers from Memphis on

You need a nighttime ritual- and it doesn't happen overnight! It usually takes a few weeks, and sometimes it only happens a little at a time. Do NOT put cereal in the bottle or send her to bed with a bottle!!!!!!!

When the sun goes down, start dimming the lights. Don't talk to her during nighttime feedings, just hum and stroke her hair. Try a book, bathtime, bottle, bed. Also, master the art of the diaper change in the dark- I got a little 1/3 gallon fishtank in my son's room that has a 7 watt bulb in it- not enough to keep him awake but bright enough that I can change his diaper without turning the overhead light on. Would you believe he sleeps through most of his nighttime diaper changes? A calming DVD like Baby Einsteins' Lullaby Time (check eBay) or some relaxing music might also help. You may also want to try a source of background noise for her room- a small desk fan or a tiny aquarium. It takes time, be patient!

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J.S.

answers from Fayetteville on

Congratulations on the baby! It sounds like what you're going through is perfectly normal. My son, who is now 4, didn't sleep through the night until between 15 and 20 weeks, and even then, it was ONLY the 5 hours. Once he got to be about 5 1/2-6 months and we started giving him solids, he slept a lot better, though I still wouldn't recommend giving solids early.

I do recommend keeping a pretty tight schedule now that your little one is old enough to adjust to one. I don't know if you swaddle your baby, but we found that swaddling, white noise (like a radio that isn't tuned to a channel), and putting the stability blocks next to him all helped him sleep longer.

Know that this is just a phase, and it shall soon pass (though soon may not feel soon enough.) I don't think I truly felt rested until he was between 12 and 18 months. I know it seems far away now, but you'll get through it. Best wishes!

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S.B.

answers from Charlotte on

First of all, you sound like a great new mommy.

Second, this will pass and eventually she will sleep for longer stretches.

Breast-fed babies do need to eat more frequently, since it is more digestible. Try the formula at night before bed (since you are using it along with breast milk), this may help.

Try to sleep during the day when she naps and let other people watch her so you can catch a nap when you can.

Good luck, and remember this will pass.

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M.U.

answers from Nashville on

hey B.

I strongly recommend reading the book 12 hours sleep by 12 weeks old. Its a quick read, i read it in about 2 hours when my son was about 6 weeks old. It basically outlines aplan of "incrementally" (like in 10 or 15 minute intervals, basicallyou start with 10 minutes then we they can push a feeding 10 minutes you go for another 10 minutes) getting them to stay in bed longer and stay up longer during the day by "entertaining" them with things other than food, like singing or a mobile or rocking a cradle. I will admit that it was not easy of course there was some screaming at first on the part of my son but I kept with it and he slept very well as a baby is even good at goig back to bed on his own now. It helps if you buy into two of the writer's key philosophies that sleep is a skill that must be learned in order to have a better life and that we do not solve problems for our children but give them the skills to solve problems for themselves. i really believe that and it helped get me through some of the early difficulty in trying to do this. But my son is a great sleeper now, is very confident in trying to solve things for himself and i wonder how much of that could be attributed to his early "lessons". we have baby #2 on the way in a few weeks and I plan to re-read the book again and do the same things with her. good luck!

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J.L.

answers from Louisville on

I know everyone has recommended a lot of good books for you, but I have another one - The Happiest Baby on the Block. He talks about the 5 S's - swaddling, swinging, shushing, sucking...can't remember the last one. Anyway, since our little girl was born we've used all his recommended techniques - particularly the swaddling and the shushing. We've swaddled her every night - they have these swaddle blankets with velcro that work great so she can't wiggle out. We also have a noise machine that plays a static, white noise sound. At around 10PM each night I feed her, then swaddle her, lay her down and turn on the white noise and she's out like a light. She's been sleeping 8+ hours a night since about 5 weeks. Hope this helps - Good luck!!

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K.S.

answers from Hickory on

Keep your chin up! This too shall pass, and you will get to sleep again! I remember despairing that my baby wasn't doing the 3-hour schedule like the book said she should, and even starting to get mad at her. But back off, and wait a week or two. This will sort itself out, and you will get through it. Meanwhile, try to rest when you can.

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T.S.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi B.,
Congrats on your little princess. I gave birth to a 10 lb little big boy, many years ago. He also was a 3 hr baby. My mother mixed ceral and formula in a small bowl very runny. Mix just a tad thicker than the formula. teaspoon mixed up
(maybe), using the baby spoon she will suck just like the bottle. I would wake him up at 11:00 pm, change and feed him. He slept all night until 6:00 am the next morning from then on. We started this a 2 wks old because he was hungry Like you I did not want cereal in the bottle. I know Dr's say alot of things to do or not to do but sometimes you have to listen to the old folks ways. Mom's idea worked for us. Hope this helps.
T.

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H.K.

answers from Huntington on

Hi B.! Someone else recommended a book called Baby Wise and I agree, I love that book! It explains how to get your baby to sooth herself back to sleep when she wakes up instead of relying on you to put her back to sleep. There's a lot of other interesting information, too. I highly recommend it!

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C.B.

answers from Raleigh on

Hey B., Congratulations on your little Angel. I am a mother of three and can confirm the common response that every baby is different. My son was a year old before he sleep through the whole night (10-12 hours), while my two girls were doing so by 3-4 months (one with some effort on my part the other on her own). Even my son, who was obviously not my sleeper, gave me at least six hours by 10 weeks. I am not a big follower of parenting books but I believe Baby Wise by Robert Bucknam is like magic for gently setting the clock of new babies to help them sleep longer stretches at night. As you can see from my results, each baby is different but based on your daughter's size I'd guess that she'd respond very well to the recommended routine. Good luck and enjoy every moment!

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M.T.

answers from Raleigh on

Does she like baths? A bath seems to wake them up and if they like them it is pleasant. So maybe you could bath her when she is getting sleepy at night so you can keep her up longer. Put her in a bouncy seat also. Even though she wont have much movement in it she can still be up and looking at things. Stimulation is the key.

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L.F.

answers from Charlotte on

Hi, B.. 10 weeks old is still very young. Most babies at this point do not sleep through the night. My daughter did not till she was 6 mo. I remember feeling like she would never sleep well and I would always be tired. It will get better!! I bought an Amby bed for my daughter at 3 mo. old and that seemed to help a little bit. She slept for the longest ever once I got that bed. It is a bit pricey so I don't know if you want to go that route but you can check out their website if interested. I believe it's ambybed.com. Good luck and although this is a frustrating time, enjoy your sweet baby!

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M.T.

answers from Nashville on

Hey... welcome to MommyHood!
Some get more sleep, some get less.
As a mother of 4, let me assure you that IT DOES GET BETTER.
I promise you! And when it does, you won't remember the agonizing sleepless nights.
BIG HINT: When she sleeps in the day, you sleep then also.

It will and does get better. I promise.

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T.B.

answers from Johnson City on

Hey B.!

Congratulations firstly on your daughter! My daughter is 9 months old and still doesn't sleep through the whole night. There have been times when she has slept the whole night and other times when she has woken up every 2 or 3 hours. As far as getting her to stay awake during the day, I completely agree with the other advice on keeping her in a sunny room and trying to do things that are loud. Kennedy always wanted to be held, and when that was no longer working for me, I would put her on a little activity mat and let her roll around (she was always in my view of course). She would usually cry, but as hard as it was, I just had to let her cry it out. I knew she was dry and fed...she was just wanting to be held. Your daughter is still young, so it seems to me that the 3 hour intervals aren't out of the ordinary at this point. I waited until my daughter was 5 months old before I put her alone in her crib, and now, it's pretty much the only place she wants to sleep. You may just have to wait it out, I mean, every baby is different. And I would definitely not put cereal in her bottle either.

As the other woman said, babies love routines. What I did for my daughter was get her up at the same time every morning (no matter how tired I was) and then 2 hours after she was awake, I put her down for a nap. Now there may be some crying involved, but you have to stick to your guns! When she woke up from that nap, 2 1/2 to 3 hours later, I put her down for another one. After she awoke from that nap, I did one last nap about 2 1/2 hours later. Then it would be time for dinner, a little family time, and then back to bed. If you keep a schedule that works for both of you, you'll find the relief that you need! It takes a lot of work and patience, but things will soon be better!

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V.C.

answers from Wheeling on

She's a little young to sleep longer than 3 hours. If she gets up, eats, and goes back to sleep, the 3-hour sleeping span is pretty normal for her age. As she gets older, she'll start sleeping longer. After 3 months, if she's not sleeping any longer, I'd make sure she's eaten plenty before bedtime, go to her the first time she cries and comfort her, but don't pick her up, and let her cry maybe 20 minutes. I know that some people think 'crying it out' has lasting detrimental effects, but the opposite is also true. So many parents 'teach' their kids that the world revolves around them, and then when they start school, or a job, or a marriage, they think it (the world) still does (revolve around them) and they have an IMPOSSIBLE time adjusting. Better too early than too late, IMOP (I have 4 adult kids ages 20-31 -- who each 'cried it out' on at least one occasion, and they all love us, each other, and [most importantly] the Lord).

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A.B.

answers from Charlotte on

I know exactly what you are going though! PLEASE do not try anything other than breastmilk or formula. You are doing just fine, don't believe what other people will say about cereal in the milk/bottle! It scares me to think people listen to that old theory. Your child needs nothing except you or formula for 6 months!! Not a day earlier, don't believe theories of food at 4 months either, no need, just increases the risk of food allergies! Anyway, to help you with your sleep problem....yes SOME children will sleep in longer intervals at about 10-12 weeks, but some don't. She loves her mommy and wants to be close. BUT I would HIGHLY recommend you check out or buy the book The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. LOVED the book and it helped us out sooo much with our first! Also, get into a good routine/pattern with her. Bath, lotion, books, songs, nurse, bed...whatever works for you, but keep it consistent. Starting at 8 weeks, you can start with a more consistent routine and slowly but surely, she'll figure things out. You have to "train" and i use that word loosely, but help her learn how to fall asleep on her own and stay asleep! Nap when she naps during the day, a lot of babies get their days and nights mixed up, but it will all work out in the end.

She is so little right now, and very precious, enjoy these small and tender moments, they grow up to fast!! Good for you to transition her to her crib, I held on for a little longer than you, and everyone is different, and there will be times when she needs you more and co-sleeping or co-napping are great for that!

Good luck, let me know if you have any other problems/questions!
I love how you are typing with one hand! I've done that plenty! Now, my secret with my older one is to find fun cartoon videos and songs on you tube and my 2 year old will sit on my lap and enjoy some videos while mommy types emails!

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A.R.

answers from Chattanooga on

Hi!

I know it seems frustrating, but not all babies will stick to the same schedule. She's only ten weeks old, so I wouldn't try to push her into sleeping longer just yet. When it happens, it will happen. A relaxing bedtime routine might help. She could be going through a growth spurt, as well. Often even babies who have been sleeping the full night through will wake to feed in the middle of the night when going through a growth spurt.

Two months old is one of the best ages for you and your wee one because you can spend lots of quality time and they aren't much of a hassel yet (that comes with mobility, hee hee!) Kids are great, but they all develop at their own rates.

Good work on moving her to her crib! This is the best age to do that at. She will start sleeping through the night when she feels ready. It's just part of mommyhood!

Good luck!

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