The Lap Band

Getting a Lap Band or other wt loss surgery is not an easy out. There is an entire process to go through before a Dr. even considers you a candidate for surgery. Most reputable surgeons are not going to operate on you without you going through all the pre-steps, including talking to a psyc professional.

Often, you have to lose 10% of you body wt before any Dr. will operate. This is to show that you have the discipline to actually do what you need to do in order to lose wt. It also greatly reduces your chance of complications and does a lot to increase your overall health.

I am not intending to be rude or insensitive here but if you are not in the right frame of mind to exercise now, what makes you think that you are going to be there after you have surgery?

I would highly recommend you get some therapy for dealing with your mother's death before you even consider going under the knife. Wt loss surgery is not always successful and if you do not take care of the demons that made you gain wt in the first place, you will only gain all the wt back. Once the stomach is stapled or otherwise restricted, it can still grow.

Please seek professional help.

Best of luck to you!

First let me say that I have never had this procedure done. I do have a neighbor whose cousin had it done. Six months after the surgery, the band cut her stomach open and the problems began. It was major.

Currently, I have another neighbor that had gastric bypass the week before Halloween. He had to go back into the hospital for emergency surgery on Nov. 2nd and has been there ever since with numerous complications. He has had 7 surgeries since Nov. 2nd and his wife was told a couple days ago that he will most likely be in the hospital until March and then need to be in a rehab facility after that. He is only 34 years old and has a 4 year old daughter. This is devastating their lives right now.

I truly believe the only way to safely and properly lose weight is through changing your diet and exercising. If you don't have the will power to do this on your own, then check into a trainer. It won't cost you any more than the surgery, especially if you have complications like they did.

N.,
The weight is the symptom, not the disease. It sounds like you are depressed. Are you also having problems with too much or too little sleep?
Get your depression under control and the weight control will work just as it has in the past.
Also, that soda was so bad for you on so many levels (teeth, diabetes, empty calories) so kudos for giving it up!
Good luckk to you,
K.

First, here is a <<hug>>. I can understand how you feel about losing your mom. Moms are always there for you...no matter what. From the moment we are born, they are our first representations of unconditional love. The fact that you are so heartbroken over losing your mom indicates that she was a GREAT mom and helped you throughout your life tremendously. And, you are a GREAT mom to your children because you are recognizing that you want to be healthy and want to change your current lifestyle.

You know that your mom would want you to be healthy and happy. Surgery is a big risk as there can be many complications. I would do as the other awesome moms have responded:

1. Come to terms with all the emotions you are feeling over your mom's passing. Seek a therapist if you need someone to help you work through these emotions. Professional therapist can weed through all of the non-issues and shine light on the real issues.

2. Get active. Not only will exercise help you lose the weight and get out of the stetchy pants, exercise will improve your mood and reduce your stress. Also, exercise puts you in control of your weight loss not some pill or surgery.

3. Eat better. If your diet is nutritious, you will have more energy to exercise and your body will feel better. Exercise and diet are both key ingredients to losing weight and getting toned.

You can do lose weight without surgery. If you want to learn some exercise tips or join an exercise group visit http://www.mamapedia.com/biz/bring-fitness-back-round-roc.... We guarantee our results :)

Good luck!

Hi N.,

I am sorry about the loss of your mother. I do feel your pain as I lost both of my parents w/in 13 months. It is very hard but you have to go on and be there for your children. They need you. I don't know anything about the lap band procedure but do understand your feelings. I gained a lot of weight too and have slowly been dropping it. It is a daily process ~ take it one day at a time. Try to find a exercise buddy who will hold you accountable. I'll keep you in my prayers.

Hang in there!

i am one that lost 80 lbs. gained it most of it back with the first pregancy and all of it back with this second. i really think you need to address the situation with your mother and emotional eating. it could also be depression. get that solved first. i know people that have had the gastric (not lap band) and they lost a ton but are slowly putting it back on due to the fact they never learned HOW to be healthy. not only do you want to be thinner you want to be happy...the goal here isnt about streachy pants, sloppy hair...its about being healthy and setting that example for your kids. i grew up as a fat kid its not fun.

Good for you for eliminating sodas! That's a very important first step, and good basis for habits that will keep you on the weight-loss road, and which leads to a life time of successful weight management - the real goal in this - not a quick fix by a Dr.

You can do this without surgery - that's a fact, and I see it all the time in my practice of Asian medicine. What's more is that when you change your eating habits, which then results in having more energy for excercise, it will be YOUR doing it, which then reinforces the fact that YOU are in charge of your own body.

A Dr. can be useful for checking for things like hypothyroidism, which I see as an epidemic, especially in women since our thyroids are twice the size of mens and way more sensitive.

You may also want to consider a support group such as Weight Watchers - this type of activity really can help!

I do understand how you feel, Maybe you should get around other people to encourage you to exercise. I personally has not tried lap band but has a few friends who has, they seems to be gaining all the weight back. So i think you should motivate yourself to get out of the house or Open the curtian or blinds let in some fresh air and join a boot camp... I recently felt the same way except i was suffering from depression. Hope you feel better ... and remember you are fabulous..

I'm so sorry to hear about your mother.Stress and depression can definitely make you eat and I know because when my grandmother died (she was like my mother because she raised me much of the time), I went down a downhill spiral and ballooned to 300lbs (mind you I'm only 5'6 but I'm curveous to begin with). I had the lap-band surgery in May of 2007 and I'm 200lbs now. Its definitely a slow process but I'm seeing that I plateaued alot. You got to keep up with it, not eating sweets (or anything over 5 grams of sugar), soda is not even an option, and anything doey like bread or pitas will make you feel like your choking or as if you had a bad lump in your throat and chest. And if you eat one of the bad things, your body will let you know. I can't tell you how many times I've felt that lumpy feeling and thrown up back what I just ate. And yes its nasty but its the reality of it. I would recommend it but if you're still depressed, it may not work because you'll continue to eat unhealthy. Work with a therapist first (some states/insurances/doctors) require a physco-exam first to see if your mentally stable because you go through dramatic changes in your body and lifestyle. Also, join a support group because you'll get to hear real stories from people who have had the surgery and they can tell you first hand on what to do and what not to do. It also gives you a great network of people to befriend, work out with and help you through those tough times. I hope everything works out for you and I wish you much success. Just remember, you're beautiful no matter what size you are, but you want to keep healthy to stick around and watch your little ones become adults themselves :D. Hope this helps.

I had the procedure done the end of May and have lost 40 pounds. You will have to lose some weight before the surgery and you will have to commit to a completely new eating style, also your doctor will most likely have you commit to exercising after your recovery. You will not be able to eat or drink some of the foods you are now used to eating. Soda and carbonated drinks are completely out of the question as is breads and raw vegetables, and anything hard to digest. The first week for me was total misery and I wanted it to be reversed, but after surviving that initial week, I am now happy I had it done most of the time. I am concerned about the holidays because of all the tempting foods. Good luck with your journey and email me with any questions if you want.

I am also trying to lose weight. I am working on changing my eating habits because I think it will be more successful than surgery. I understand how hard it is to work hard for a week and not see immediate results so it is tempting to quit. What has worked best for me is to cut out certain foods and drinks as others have suggested, along with exercise.

For variety, I have found an exercise program on TV as well as several online. Then I add an outdoor workout sometimes on our trampoline. I'm sure your 4 year old would love to join you.

What is best to remember, is that you should allow yourself a day here and there (once a week at first) where you allow yourself something that is really hard to give up. Then you can look forward to a treat once in a while without the guilt of blowing it. After a while, I noticed that I really only want the taste so I will only ask for a bite of my husband's serving. Who would have thought that I could actually resist desserts!

The best part is that when I don't feel like I am losing much weight, my husband will remind me how good I am looking.

If I can do it, anyone can. I know you will feel good about yourself just being more healthy. Be sure to tell people so they can check your progress. It is another reason to stick with it.

Good luck! Your kids will be so proud!

Everyone else has covered the 'surgery wont help without different mind set' topic, so I am going to skip that.

First of all, congratulations on not giving up. It is hard. I was tiny throughout most of my youth, but gained 60-65 pounds after having 2 children, which would not go away. I quit drinking sodas, and that helped a lot. You know, I started drinking not just water, but teas as well, and it seemed to help. Perhaps because tea acts like a diuretic to an extent.

Next, utilize the support group you have to motivate you. It is good to have friends and an outside support group, but nothing tops the love of your family. My 5 year old loves taking my walks with me, so she will ask to go for a walk, which motivates me to get up and go, and then seeing her happy face makes me want to be healthy for her. Perhaps there are even other activities that you and your children can participate in together.

Remember to find some "you time" as well. Soak in a bath with some salts, or read a book. Aroma therapy is great for feeling revitalized and lessening depression. Seek help if you feel you need it. Best wishes to you.

Hi N.,

I am so sorry to hear about your mom. It is so hard.

I don't know anything about Lap band, but I would suggest a sensible step by step nutritional program that takes baby steps to make life long changes.

I work with women and families doing just this. You can check out my business in the Mamasource business section or email me at ____@____.com bless and good luck to you!
K.