Thanksgiving Dinner and My Sister Wants to Bring the Dog!

Can you offer to help pay for the kennel? Or completely pay for it for her? What about having the dog and puppy in the garage? They could romp around together, and would probably enjoy each other. Plus would be so tired at the end of the night - ALL will sleep well.

Good luck to you - sounds tough, but I wouldn't give up a visit with my brother over a pet issue (since we already have several running around) - really - whats one more?!?

Why not offer to pay to kennel her dog for her? If it's just one night, it doesn't need to be a high-end place, many vets do it for pretty cheap.

I agree with everyone else. Just tell her that if she wants to bring the dog bring a dog kennel. If Money is an issue tell her to look on www.Craigslist.org I have found them for as little as $30 and they fold up
Good Luck,
M.

S.,

I am a long time dog lover and owner. I have had my big Newfie/Lab/Marshmallow Russell since he was four weeks old. Yes I love him. Yes, I feel terrible leaving him alone - even for short trips. But I know he gets in the way just by being himself. My gosh, he's 106 lbs! He can't help himself.

That being said ...

I would never force him on anyone! Even though he's the most docile dog in the world! He is the sweetest most gentle dog ever. I would never ever MAKE anyone open their home to him. I can't believe that your sister is making a stink (pardon the pun) about this. There has GOT to be a friend or a neighbor she knows that can watch her dog for the few days she is gone.

Stick to your guns. Holidays are crazy enough as it is. If your SIL brings it up again just tell her "Oh, I know it's so tough to leave him. I WISH we had the space and time, but you know how crazy it's going to be" and nothing else.

Good luck to you. You may have to resign yourself that holidays are chaotic and crazy and stressfull. Try and shrug it off and enjoy yourself.

J.

S.,
I might have a solution for you. Check out the kennels/doggie daycares near your home and offer to pay for your sister's dog to stay there for a day. That way she won't have to pay for a kennel the entire time, and it will only cost you $20-$30 for the day. I suggest that you pay so it will take the "I can't afford it" out of the argument.

If she doesn't agree to that, maybe you put the puppy in the kennel (I know- probably not the best solution, but would help keep the peace). If you have a trusted friend who will be alone on Thanksgiving, they might enjoy having a puppy for the day.

Anyway, I hope that helps. I have two dogs and have to travel for the holidays, so I understand. My dogs love doggy daycare- they have a great time, get lots of exercise and a bath.

Just remember- kennels fill up for the holidays so call soon, and be prepared to present vaccination records.

Hi S.! I don't blame you! I wouldn't want my mother's big dog running around my house! I would tell your sister (if she's insistant) that if she can bring a cage to put him in, then fine, but he's not running all over the place. Especially since you have your puppy to deal with. The two dogs together could be worse than kids! I would tell her... no crate or cage... no dog. Sorry, sis! Don't they have a neighbor who could go to their house while they're gone and let it out? I always do it for my neighbor.

As for the turkey tip... put your turkey in the roasting pan with the breast down... not up. I did it on accident years ago, and it was the most tender and moist turkey we ever had! My mom was so proud of me! Unfortunately, now she wants ME to make the turkey! Use a turkey bag (that's part of the key to a good turkey) and place it breast down with water (about a 1/2 inch in bottom of the pan) and about four boullion cubes in the bottom. Make lots of gravy with the broth! YUM!! Enjoy!

She can't bring a crate and crate the dog away from the commotion? I don't know how long she's staying, but from her perspective, it's difficult to leave a dog for too long because they have to be let out to potty, etc. Kenneling is sometimes not the best option because, like daycares, they carry a lot of disease. I would see no issues with someone wanting to bring a dog to my house for the holidays, as long as they brought a crate and crated the dog for the majority of the time they were there. The dog really isn't going to hurt for a bit of crate time and it keeps her from worrying about it and him out of your hair.

Hope this helps!

I haven't read the other responses, so forgive me if I repeat what has already been said. If she can't afford a kennel or doesn't want to are 2 different things.
One thought is to let her bring the dog, arrange for a kennel yourself for BOTH dogs during Thanksgiving dinner when everyone is around, and pick the dogs up after dinner or the next day. You could also think about getting a run between 2 trees in your backyard, if you don't have a fence-in yard they could stay in. The kids would love playing outside with both of them if they could. You will probably need something sometime for just your dog, and they are not very expensive.

We're hosting dinner this year, too. We'll have about 30 people and no one lives locally so about 20 of them will be crashing on the floor of our basement, in our guest room and some of the kids will be on the floor of our kids' room. I'm looking forward the chaos -- it'll just be a few days and it'll be FUN. Anyways.... 3 people are bringing their dogs. To us, pets are part of the family... we always bring our dogs when we visit family in upstate NY and they always bring their dogs. It's partly financial but also because dogs are part of a family.

Anyways... the dogs have never been any trouble. If anything, they keep all the kids entertained playing in the basement and backyard. :-) When we're trying to eat, though, the dogs are either outside, locked in the laundry room or in the basement. You could just put the dogs in the garage or laundry room or outside the majority of the time.

I think you should find a compromise or offer to pay for the kennel. It can get expensive and most people I know can't afford a kennel (around here 1 dog is over $30/day at the cheapest place). After all, her and family are already paying for gas and other travel expensives to come see you. I can't imagine telling any relative, but especially my sister, that they can't come just because we don't want their dog to come. We think it's important to see family, especially at the holidays, and to me it seems silly to nitpick and basically tell them they can't come just because they have a dog.

Is her dog crate trained? Is your's? Maybe you could agree to let her bring her dog, IF he is kept in a crate during dinner? And if your sister and her husband take turn "babysitting the dogs" when they need to go out. Trust me, you will be surprised over the next few year how many times you may need to say "can I bring the puppy".

My family is full of dog owners, we all travel with our pups, Thanksgiving at Grams is full of people inside and doggies in the yard.

And think, you can use this as a great time to socialize your dog.

S.,

I know you have already decided to have them bring their dog but I just thought I would share my experience. We host Thanksgiving for around 25 each year and last year we also had 5 dogs at our house. Oh yes, and all the dogs stay while we have 12-15 people also staying for 3 days! We have 1 dog. But my daughter has 2 dogs (my granddogs)and I have a niece with 2 dogs. They all got along just fine and, yes there was an accident or 2 as 1 of the dogs was a puppy but we just cleaned it up and went on with having a good family time. This year we may have 6 dogs as I have another niece who has 1 dog who recently just lost his companion dog and I am sure he will be grieving his canine friend. I won't mind and I am sure all the dogs will enjoy themselves and I am sure the owners will have a much better time knowing their dogs are ok.
Having said that I have a suggestion. We never kennel our dog. We get a neighborhood teenager who loves our dog and we just hire them to come in 2 times a day to let him out and feed him etc. We make sure the "kids" parents are aware of our absence so there will be an adults eye on the house and we leave the phone number where we can be reached if necessary.

Does your sister have a kennel to keep her dog in? I know that dogs are very important members of the family. It depends on how big your sister's dog is and how much discipline he has. I would not freak out about the dog's destroying the house. The will add a great stress free environment to Thanksgiving dinner! Dogs are so much fun, I hope you reconsider your decision. If the dogs are controlled, it will be a great time. Put the dogs in the kennel while you eat to keep them contained. Your dog would love to have a playmate. Your sister's dog might even be able to teach your dog how to pee outside if your having problems. Dogs learn by watching other dogs just like children. Hope this doesn't make you mad, just want to give you another opinion. Good Luck!!!

I don't blame you one bit. My only advice would be to tell her that if she must bring her dog, then she must bring a dog crate that her dog will stay in ( maybe in the garage if it's not too cold). Then you could put your puppy away for a while sometimes and let her dog out too -kind of trade off. I agree that it will be an inconvenience for everyone and it would be better if she left the dog at home, but not everyone can do that. It might be worth the inconvenience of using a dog crate so save your relationship and enable her (and her DH/kiddos) to come share with your family. Best wishes! A.

I know you've seemed to have made your mind, but in case anyone else is in this situation happens to come across this post or if you're still on the fence.

How does her dog react to other dogs and/or large groups of people? If s/he does not react well to other pets then by no means should s/he be allowed. You wouldn't welcome your sister's older kids who slap your baby constantly; to me its a similar principle, but then again I was raised in a family where the pets are regarded as family members. Its the puppy's home, not your sis's dog's.

How has this dog acted in the past? One major unprovoked bite (i.e. needing doctor's care) would make him unwelcome in my home until she invests time/energy/money into some serious obedience training.

What habits does your sis have with the dog? For example, if you're not wanting to teach your puppy to beg from the table and your sis's dog expects a plate of his/her own, you're gonna have either a puppy who's learned an undesirable habit that you get to struggle to undo or a dog who's gonna drive everyone crazy at the table. (From my experience I've found breaking a long-time heavy smoker of the nicotine habit much easier than breaking a dog of the human food habit.)

You mentioned the idea of your dog staying overnight at her place. Are you housing her family AND making Thanksgiving dinner for 30 people AND making sure your home is presentable for both situations AND trying to enjoy the holiday yourself AND try not to loose your mind in the process? She sure is asking a lot of you. What can the other family members do? Surely someone else can house the dog.

Hey S.,
Say no to the dog! I totally agree with you and had a similar situation in my family. My sis-in-law brought her dog to my nieces b-day party and it bit my niece! Too much excitement with too many new faces and new environment. Ended up causing a lot of grief between family members, still to this day. Not worth it!! Tell her to find a neighbor/kid to come dogsit. Much cheaper and dog is happy at home. As for the turkey, get one of those self basting bags and use as directed. The trick is....put a stick of butter and whatever seasonings inside the turkey and put it in bag and roast BREAST DOWN!! This self basts the turkey and it will actually be JUICY!! THe best way to cook a turkey. GOod luck!!

Is there any family that will be there that will be willing to let your sisters dog stay at their house for the day? I know how it is, my brother-in-law will bring their black lab to our house when they are just coming over for the day...we have a black lab too that is very low key, but when you get them together they are running all over the house and their dog always tries to eat our cat's food and they don't care.

As for the turkey, my husband injects the turkey the night before with flavored butter (they have plain butter, garlic butter, etc...) and then he deep fries it the next day. We love it and I don't like it baked anymore.
You can get the oil and big deep fryer at a Sporting good store, Super Walmart, Tractor Supply etc...

Good luck!

I am the biggest dog lover, I have 3. Love them, love them, love them! However, I wouldn't bring them along to someone's home, especially if they already said no. I think she shoudl check into boarding , but she may not find one accepting anymore this late. Surely someoone can help her out. Or in the past we have had friends or hired a teen ager to come to our home to let our dogs go out and take them for walks. But with only one dog that may not work well, we had 2 at the time keeping each other company. We all know what lonely dogs are capable of. If it comes down to to it, what if she brought a kennel along and kept the dog in your garage/basement or wherever? Just a thought!

I would offer to kennel her dog at a nearby facility and offer to pay for it. If not, tell her the only way she can bring the dog is if it stays outside or in a crate somewhere in the house/garage. It's your house, you have a right to decide who/what can come to it. We don't have ANY pets for a variety of reasons and I would not want a dog visiting inside my home. We have already decided if my SIL wants to bring her dog for a visit we will be making a reservation at the kennel down the street or sadly, they can stay home. It's their choice, not mine.

Since she has 3 children, I bet she has a teenage-type babysitter that she calls every now and then for an evening out. Maybe she could call someone like that whom she trusts and ask them to dog/house sit while they are away. P.S. McCormicks Turkey Rub on your raw bird then put it into a bag and in the oven. No need for basting, and the stuffing can go in there too.

heres my advice, you might not like. first of all if she cannot afford kennel. the only other thing is to see if she has a friend that would check in on the dog for her( we do that alot) but other wise if i was your sister and i had no alternitive. i would say well we will just stay home and not come to visit you. so maybe you need to think do i want to see my sister and have some out of controlness or not see my sister. the choice is yours.

find out adn pray that someone who is coimg has severe allergies it takes you out of hte meanie spot adn so sorry we have allergies to dogs comeing adn unfortunetly he can not join us.
R

Having been on both sides of this issue I understand. Do either of you use crates? I say crate her dog in the garage, your dog in the bedroom he prefers. Have the kids take them outside to run them a couple times a day.
Also, I have a prescription to calm my dog, which makes her sleep. Maybe you could both get one and keep the dogs sedated for the visit.

Otherwise, all you can do is ask her to please get a neighbor or friend to look after her dog. Tell her there is too much chaos with 2 dogs and that you will keep your dog in a bedroom so he is not bothering anyone either.

Is it possible that you could put both dogs in the backyard to meet initially & then maybe both dogs could be crated in separate rooms or the garage during dinner? Just a suggestion if it can be worked out.

C.

I would tell her that she can bring the dog as long as she is willing to crate the dog in another room/basement the whole time she is there. I know that causes other issues, but at least you could still see them and the crate is much cheaper than the kennel.

If you stand firm with her having to have a crate for the dog to be in it might not be too bad. Does she crate train it already might be the first question. Other wise the dog would whine a lot.

I use celery to season my turkey. Along with onion and salt and pepper. Oh and let the bird sit for some time after taking it out of the oven to soak up the moisture and flavors. I like to use the oven turkey bags for less mess when cleaning up.

Good luck.

i know you said you don't want her to bring the dog :o) BUT we always bring out dog ( 4 year old chocolate lab) to holidays. however, we are nice enough to not let him disrupt anything & most of the guests don't even know he's there. we bring his kennel & keep him in the basement, garage, or outside (he is normally an inside dog) & then put him in his kennel at night. we play with him & take him for walks to keep him happy & not barking.
maybe you could let the dog come, but say he can't be inside?

Whether or not guests can bring pets is totally up to the host!!You don't want her dog, she can't bring the dog. Sister or not, it's bad manners to impose your pet where it's not wanted. I say stick to your guns.

If money is the issue, offer to pay for kenneling either at her house or yours. If you kennel the dog near your house, maybe it could be only for the short time you have the whole crowd there. Afterward, when it is only your family and sis's, there will be less excitement and fewer distractions for you; maybe the extra dog would be less unwelcome then. Maybe sis would be more likely to agree if you kennel BOTH dogs while your house is packed.... just a thought.

If the dog comes......it stays in the garage and/or a carrier while it is there. EVEN IF you have to park cars in the driveway or street for a day or two, it might be worth saving the sibling relationship. If she can't afford a kennel, then she should at LEAST respect that and the limitations you set.

AS for the bird.........Buy some Lawry's Poultry rub. It has lemon & thyme in it. Rub this under the skin and on top and all over the bird. Bake at 325 with the foil ON and then the last 20 minutes or so take it off and brown the bird. NOW..you can ALSO bake it UPSIDE DOWN. This keeps the juices flowing DOWN into the breast meat. Again, if it's not too big or too much trouble, turn it over the last 20-30 minutes and brown it.

AWESOME flavor!

Hi S. ~

I'm with Libby on this one. We get together with my family every year for the holidays at my sister's house, and we always have a large canine crowd along with the human family members. My sister has a dog and a cat. My niece brings her two Greyhounds along, and my sister's mother-in-law brings her poodle. All the dogs get along well, and they actually keep each other entertained and happy.

Since you have a puppy of your own, it would be difficult, not to mention unfair, to plead allergies on someone's part.

Dogs are pack animals, and they are usually thrilled to spend time with others of their own kind. Why not give it a try, and have a plan for a place where the dogs can stay if they begin to get under foot? The dogs will live up to your expectations. If you relax and expect them to get along and have a good time, they will do so. If you expect trouble, they will pick up on your tension and become more hyper. With dogs, it's always best to go with the flow and enjoy their company. I've always found that one lone dog is more likely to get under foot than a few of them who can keep each other occupied.

Whatever you decide, I hope you all have a wonderful time and enjoy yourselves.

S.,

Then don't expect your sister to be able to come to family events. I know it's a big inconvenience, but as a dog owner, I often have to take my dog with me when I visit my grandson. I plan my trips so that the weather is ok to leave my dog in the car, but my visits have to be short, and I have to take her out of the car to pee and stretch. It is not possible for me to put her in a kennel or leave her at home. Sometimes people just don't have anyone they can ask to take care of the dog--hence the reason why some people need a dog for a companion. Yes, this annoys some people who don't understand, but it's the best I can do.

You have to decide how much you're willing to put up with to see your sister and your nephews. Is there a room or garage/porch where their dog could go?

Here is my suggestion: approach it from the safety angle, the safety of your people and dog family members. If the two dogs have not met yet, your puppy could potentially see her dog as a threat on 'her turf' and want to bite and/or fight with your sister's dog. If this happened and your family tried to pull them apart they might be bitten or hurt in the process as well. not something anybody wants to see happen. This exact same scenario happened with my sister in law and our dogs, except the difference was we were the ones leaving and not wanting to put her in a kennel, but my SIL was glad to try and take the dog, except the two dogs felt threatened by each other and wouldn't quit trying to fight, even when my dog was shut in a room (she damaged my SIL's bedroom door a bit with the scratching), and then she had to come and tell me 'hey, look, it isn't going to work with our dogs together." be firm but kind...ask your sis to pay a neighbor to come and make sure the dog has food/water and has gone out. it would be less than the cost of a kennel. or, if it is monetarily feasible for you, ask someone you know to watch the dog and/or pay for a kennel. do you know anyone who lives close to your sister who would be willing? these are just some ideas. hope it works out for you! --A.

I would absolutely feel comfortable enough to take my dog (member of the family) to my OWN SISTER's house. It you are worried about your puppy's behavior, could you crate the puppy during the dinner? I would try to keep the relationship with my sister, and not make it a battle of the dogs. If you are the one to concede, you are the better one for it.

I'm not sure how comfortable you would be with this, but...

Every dog owner has some sort of dog cage or kennel house for them inside the house. Tell her to bring one with her. You can put the cage outside in the garage, and her dog will be outside of your house and away from your puppy and guests.

First of all, how old is your puppy? If it won't have it's parvo vaccine by Thanksgiving, just tell your sister that it would be dangerous to expose your dog to other dogs because it is not up to date with its shots. Another solution would be to crate train the puppy and keep it in a room away from all the chaos. Dog, or no dog, there is going to be excitement for puppy and therefore, lots of pee. If the other dog comes anyway, think of it as an opportunity to socialize your puppy with another dog. Maybe your sister could ask a neighbor to come over and let her dog out and feet it while she's away. Much cheaper. There are also dog walkers that will provide that kind of service at a much cheaper price than a kennel. Make sure the service is reliable and insured and bonded so she doesn't get robbed while away by the dog walker. Just some thoughts. Good luck. If you need some advice on getting the excitable peeing under control, just respond individually to me.

Good luck,

C.

Do you have a garage the dog can wait in? I just think family relationships are a little more important than a dog and even a dog peeing on the floor. Really, in the long run a little craziness is worth it. Why create a possible riff in family for this? I really am not an animal person, but if this were my sibling, I would say bring yourself, and if you absolutely can't afford a place for the dog we'll work something out. Family first!

The first Christmas we were in our new house we had my sister and my parents over. My parents were on their way to Arizona to live. They both brought their dogs. We had 8 people and 4 dogs in the house for that weekend. It was crazy! We had a great time though. When they all left we had to clean a few spots on the carpet, but we'd have had to do that anyway with the kids running in and out and all the mud. We all love our dogs, they are part of the family. Our dogs love each other. My lab, Sarah, gets so excited when I tell her that her cousin Sammy is coming to visit. I know that my sister and parents wouldn't want to kennel their dogs just to visit for a weekend, its expensive and upsetting for the dog. Its so much easier just to travel with the dog. When its time to eat, all dogs out, with treats of course, it's Thanksgiving, or Christmas for them also. When its bed time we leave the doors open, so the dogs can roam. We tried shutting the bedroom doors and the dogs whined all night long. If your dogs are reasonably well behaved and you are firm, they should all be fine. I can't even imagine not seeing my family over the holidays just because I didn't want the dogs to visit. That would truly be a shame.

I have to say that if your sister has not found a place for her dog yet she may not find a kennel that has room. Thanksgiving and Christmas are the two biggest holidays for kennels. A lot of them get book up during the summer for the holday weekends.

You could tell her if she insists on bringing her dog that she has to bring a kennel and while people are at your house the dog needs to be in his/her kennel. She can take him/her out to potty while everyone is there insist that she put him/her on a leash before letting the dog come out of the kennel. That way she should have full control of the dog and you won't have to put up with two crazy dogs running throught your house.

Hope this helps you a little
A.

Well if she can't affor a kennel and you don't want the dog, then the only option she has is to not attend your Thanksgiving dinner.
If not having the dog is more important to you than not having her join the family gathering, then tell her again that her dog is not welcome.
Note: can someone else in the family keep the dog in their house?

Why do people think they can bring dogs to dinner. We just had my wifes family show up with FIVE dogs! There were 22 people there! It's just not right....and it was only for the afternoon!