Terrible Two's! - Tuxedo Park,NY

Your really doing the right thing already , ignoring the tantrum , but when he calms down you need to praise him for that. If he likes to throw himself around and there is the risk of him hurting himself on table corners and units then I would put him in his crib (if he still uses one) , or put him in a room that has carpet and walk away. I've had to do that with my almost 2 yr old as she also likes to throw herself and kick when she hears the word "no" , arn't they fun!!!!lol

The thing that worked for me was to walk away. Go into another room. If he follows, move again and shut the door. Go do laundry or something. I'd also say, "I can't understand you when you act like that. Use your words."
Really the best thing is to ignore it and move on.
Do NOT give in to his demands, though... that will just perpetuate this stage and he may never grow out of it. Kids need to understand that no means no no matter what.
YMMV
LBC

I can’t say that I have experienced a 45 minute tantrum nor do I want to!!! Most kid’s frustration at the age of 2 is the lack of ability to communicate. My son - who has a trach - was 2 in December. We started to teach him sign language when he was about 9 months old and has helped tremendously! He slowly stopped using his signs and speaks all of his word now and there are times when he will speak and sign at the same time. This has also helped with his ability to understand more. Most times when I tell Clinton that he cannot have something I give him a short period of time until he can have it. For instance - you can’t have a cookie now but you can have it after lunch. You have to give them a time frame that they can understand. They don’t understand the difference between 6:30 AM and 12:00 PM - but they would understand breakfast and lunch. Clinton has had his fair share of 'tantrums' - at that point I put him in his bed or just leave him be and let him relax until he is ready - sometimes I have to interfere (because of his medical condition) and try to calm him after a few minutes and that seems to work. One thing I am sure to do is not bring up the situation that caused the tantrum unless he does and I give it a quick response and move on to the next thing...distraction! Good Luck!

At two, kids already understand quite a bit. Explain things to him--like why he is not going to get a cookie at 6:30am but can have one after lunch/at snack time. And then offer an alternative, such as a piece of apple or banana.
If he is frustrated because he can not verbally express himself, then help him by asking him questions. I did this with my kids...I would tell them for example: "I know you want something, help mommy to understand what you want." and then ask him simple questions like "Does something hurt you? Are you hungry/thirsty? " Just keep reassuring him that you are trying to help him but can't if he is carrying on. Also FIRMLY but CALMLY let him know that you will help him when he calms down. This will help him to learn to be calmer as time goes on. It help to teach them how to deal with their feelings.
It is good that you don't give in. Terrible two's do pass.

Twos and threes are hard. They are so illogical at times. You could try having the cookie container empty and looking for a cookie and none being there and being disappointed along with your son. You could try saying 'yes. cookies after lunch. (or whatever is cookie time). I make 'breakfast cookies' where I take a cookie recipe with oatmeal and/or peanut butter in it then cut the sugar by at least half. I Cut the butter by half and substitute applesauce and also use ground oats for half the flour. It's pretty good. I'm sure it's much better than most breakfast cereals. You can also add flax or some other nutrients in there as well.

Be kind while he is upset and keep constant that cookies are not for breakfast. Talk about it other times when he's not upset so he gets used to the idea. Also play with him and have his toys ask for cookies and have them learn that they aren't for breakfast either. Let him take turns being the 'mom' and being the 'boy' in the asking and teaching what are good breakfast foods.

Finally think if you really really wanted something but couldn't have it. How would you like your friends to respond to you and what would you want them to tell you. Use this perspective when you're talking with your son. He is still not getting the cookie, but you are acknowledging where he is coming from and respecting his opinion.

My son was 2 on March 20 he has started throwing things and rolling around on the floor. Not responding is really the best solution. Dont try to console him or reason with him either just leave him flaying on the floor. Do give a reason why once. Any reaction is just letting know your hearing him. This morning my son wanted candy before breakfast I said to him breakfast first you know the rules.
Everything is stage with toddlers. It will be over soon.

Has anyone warned you about age 3 yet? It was much worse for us than 2 with our son. Our daughter turned 2 a few weeks ago, and she's throwing more tantrums lately - especially with sharing toys (even when she's not playing with them).

One of the things that worked with our son was to ask him to "show us" when he needed something if we couldn't understand.

Our pediatrician recommended diversion as his preferred tactic in those situations. Doesn't work for our daughter. But, telling her to stop crying has been strangely effective. She was doing it last night as we were all playing outside. Another kid took a ball out of a bucket she was playing with, and she melted down.

I grabbed her wrist, sat her in the grass and sternly told her to stop crying, start sharing or she would go inside and not play with the other kids. She whimpered, and it was over.

I had a similar situation to yours with our son at 2.5 in Target. He wanted a certain Matchbox car, and it was right after Christmas, so I told him no. He melted down repeating "I want red bus" over and over and over. I walked all over the store with him screaming, and everytime he said it, I responded with, "I know you want the red bus and so does everyone else here". I know I got the evil eye from everyone, and I did the best I could by simply ignoring him and not giving in.

Good luck. He's exerting his independence and learning your boundaries. I applaud you for standing your ground.

My son is 3 and a half and i went through that same thought and feelings with him. sometimes i had to just step outside with him and tell him if he wanted to scream we were going to do it outside. not inside!! but it is an age thing and must be a boy thing as well. my sons dad was gone when he was 11 months old though so he has some other built up frusteration. all i have to say is that you only thing the terrible twos are bad. wait until he reaches 3years. omg. i cant handle my son most of the time. he has me and my fiancee and for some reason has decided that he dont listen to me only my fiancee and even still then he is mouthy, talks back and pretty much thinks he is the boss and that is that!! LOL it is rough. i tend to end up outside on the steps alone crying because i get so frusterated. i dont let him see me cry or get that frusterated if i can help it but sometimes when it just happens and he sees that he upsets me he sometimes calms down and behaves for a while longer than normal. he doesnt like to upset me so i think its again the age. but threes are way worse than 2's. they can start to talk alot better by 3 and do and it just sucks sometimes because they tend to like the no word as much as we did when they were babies. LOL anyway good luck, i am sure you will be fine. lots of breathing. i need to take my own advice sometimes. make daddy do some work as well!!(if able, dont like to assume, sorry) good luck

Ignore it, and when he stops or show signs of calming down then you should encourage him and talk to him again. Sometimes while my daughter is mid-tantrum and doesn't shows signs of stopping on her own I just pick up some toy near her and start playing with it or talk to her like she is not crying and shrieking at the top of her lungs. I'll say "gee i think this baby doll needs a bottle, she seems hungry" and start to feed her baby and rock it. I don't bring it to her and try to get her to play with it, I just go off and play with it by myself, just within her eyesight. I still ignore her til she's done screaming. She usually gets too curious not to come over and see what I'm doing, and then she's distracted and we play for a little bit.