I would like to hear from other Moms. I probably shouldn't be concerned, but my 5 month old son still needs to nap every two hours or so. (ie, he shows signs of tiredness and will often get cranky if i don't put him down) His naps are short, about 30-40 minutes (sometimes only 20 minutes!). I think my real problem is that I read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child" upon the reccomendation of a friend and it has made me WAAYY too concerned about baby's sleep patterns. ( I think I may also be dealing with a bit of postpartum depression, not a good mix with that book IMO) The good news is that he is cheerful baby and seems content and alert most days. He does ok sleeping through the night,typically managing 5 hours at a time. I'm a new mom and I keep wondering when he will develop into the 2-3 naps a day that I feel like I hear and read about so much. Did any of you find that as the periods of wakefulness increased, the nap length increased? Thanks for your responses.
Oh, I am so grateful to hear from all of you! I think I can have peace now about my son's naps.
I thought it would be helpful to people who browse this topic to hear my update. My son is about 7 1/2 months old now.
I fully believe that a good night's sleep makes for better daytime naps for him. One poster mentioned swaddling. I went back to swaddling with one arm out for about 2 weeks and noticed he slept better in the night. After that, he kept on busting out of the swaddle(wanting to roll over) so I stopped.
An interesting wrinkle to this story is that I am breastfeeding and found that I have problems with my milk supply. I believe that his has to do with the fact that I resumed menstruating 2 mos after his birth. I notice supply problems at the time of my period and the approximate time of my ovulation. That definitely affects his nighttime sleep and his day as well. (FYI, I eat steel cut oatmeal and take a calcium/magnesium supplement and I pump to help with the supply problem).
Now he sleeps roughly 9 hours straight at night. His naps have improved and are longer in duration. I do attribute that to a good night's sleep and to his getting a bit older. Also, he had a tendency to go down for a quick 1/2 hour nap right before his bedtime routine. I used to think he needed that to get through nursing w/o falling asleep. Now I keep him up and I think that helps with his night sleep. He isn't really predictable in the length of the naps, but I do notice something of a pattern. When I feel that he needs more sleep, I do one of two things: I either lay down with him for his last nap, or I put him to bed a half hour earlier.
I would also like to give two big thumbs up to the two transitional items that I use to get my son to sleep for naps and for nighttime (his problem was never getting to sleep, rather staying asleep was the issue). I use a Cuski (with a pacifier tied to his "cap") and the Gentle Giraffe from Cloud B.
Thank you, thank you, everyone! I hope putting so many details into my update will be helpful to someone else.
At that age they should be napping anywhere from 3-4 times daily, my 8 month old takes 2-3 which is conidered normal. everything seems to be normal from what it sounds. Hope this helps! :]
Hi N.,
Oh you sound just like I did when my daughter was younger. My daughter NEVER had any sort of a sleep/nap schedule (and she still doesn't at 14 months!!!) I got so frustrated and worried about her sleep patterns (and sometimes I still do). I literally remember days just crying and crying out of exhasperation. All the books and advice from other people can make you crazy. I bought just about every baby sleep book and I just didn't find anything that I felt would work for me. People used to really give me a lot of grief that my daughter didn't have a schedule (and people still give me funny looks that my 14 month old does not have a schedule- though we do have a routine now), but forcing a schedule on a baby who clearly had no schedule just seemed impossible and silly to me. Every time I think I see a pattern emerging I think we finally have a schedule! Then, it always changes again after a couple days. I've learned to just go with this.
At 5 months my daughter was still going down for a nap about 2 hours after she woke up. And she would nap anywhere from 20-45 min. (every once in a while we would get a solid hour out of her, but that was very rare). There was no 2-3 naps/day- the number of naps and timing of naps varied every day based on what time she woke up in the morning and how long each nap was.
At some point (and I honestly don't remember exactly when this was, maybe 8-9 months), she began being able to go 2 1/2 hours awake before needing a nap. She kept that up until she was about 13 months, then she did begin falling into a 2 nap/day pattern(though the times and lengths were still completely unpredictable). She did not sleep through the night until she was almost a year (and that was when I finally just stopped going in and nursing her at night).
Now, at 14 months, she has dropped to one nap/day which ranges from 1- 2 1/2 hours and the time is completely variable based on when she wakes up and how tired she is. Even if she's absolutely exhausted she will no longer take a second nap. She now usually sleeps 11-13 hours at night which is the only reason she can get away with so little daytime sleep. Sometimes she gets so exhausted from her lack of napping and she can be so cranky and miserable. I wish I could help her/make her sleep and it can be very frustrating. Oh, and I should also say- we still rock her to sleep. If she doesn't fall asleep rocking with us it takes her 1 hour plus to fall asleep on her own. I get a lot of grief for rocking her to sleep too, but again- this is what works for us.
I have finally accepted the fact that I do not have a good sleeper (well, not a good napper- she does pretty well at night now- finally!). She is a happy, healthy child, so there are no negative consequences of her dysfunctional sleeping (even though sometimes she just looks and acts SO tired and just will not sleep!) Hang in there. It does get better, though your son may just never be a good napper. Do what works best for him- if that means putting him down for a nap every couple hours, then do it. Not all babies conform to the "normal"- I wish the books said that!
I also think it's very helpful to know that there are other moms out there who are going through the same thing. I remember thinking when my daughter was 4 months old that I was the only one who had a 4 month old that wouldn't sleep and no one could possibly understand what I was going through. Of course that wasn't true, but everyone I knew with babies had their babies on these beautiful schedules and there was no question about nap times, feeding times, bedtime, etc. It has never been like that in our house and I don't think it will ever be. It can make your life a little harder to plan (I never know what time to make doctor's appointments since I don't know when she will be sleeping), but it is so important to do what works. You know what is best for your child.
Sorry this got so long- this is obviously something I am extremely passionate about since we have struggled so much with it. Hang in there- it will get better! Feel free to private message me if you want to talk more about it (or just have someone to vent to that understands)
J.
my daughter didnt take consistent naps till about 10-11 months. ikept trying and trying to get her on a schedule but she wouldnt stick to it. id day if youre comfortable with his sleep patterns just let him go. all babies are different. if he sleeps 5 hours at a time at night is he waking only once?? for his age id say thats really good. my daughter was still waking 2-3 times at that age. let him tell you what sleep he needs. you know your child better than any "expert" that writes a book. my only piece of advice would be not to wait to long to get him sleeping through the night, my daughter never did it on her own, and i kept thinking she was too young to make sleep all night, we finally did it at 9 months and looking back i wish i had done it months earlier!! good luck with your sleep!
Hey N., my son is almost five months and I feel your pain! I read the same book and feel the same anxiety about naps. Everyone else's babies seem to have perfect sleep schedules. Meanwhile, my son naps anywhere from 45 minutes to 1 and a half hours but at different times every day based upon when he wakes in the AM. I can't schedule anything outside the house!
Like your baby, my son is usually tired an hour and a half to two hours after waking. The whole eating process takes him almost 40 minutes still, so this leaves very little play time between naps. He also goes to sleep around 7:30 and wakes around 7:30 in the AM with two feedings in between. I worry that his entire day is just sleeping and eating. Somehow, he is still meeting all his milestones. But I'm always worried that he'll fall behind since he doesn't get as much tummy time as my friends' babies do. Anyway, just wanted you to know that you're not alone!
Hi N.,
I totally understand. When my daughter (now 2 years old) was 4 months she was a frequent napper with very short (20-30 minute) naps. The best thing I did was read Elizabeth Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solutions" book. I also read the "Health Sleep, Healthy Child" book and was freaked out. But, Pantley's book really spoke to me and made sense. Her information is based on many mother's experiences, rather than research statistics.
Some babies just need short, frequent naps. Don't despair. With Elizabeth Pantley's help, my daughter now takes 1 nap and sleeps for 2-3 hours! Putting her to bed is a breeze now too. I highly recommend Elizabeth Pantley!!! Good luck to you!
N.,
I remember my son's early months being just a repeated cycle of eat, sleep, wake, repeat!
Don't stress. He sounds like a pretty good sleeper so that's good. The problem with consulting a book about babies is that the babies don't read the books! LOL He'll get on a more set nap routine when he's closer to O.. God bless!
Here's the problem with books written by the experts: they're written about the average child, and the average child just doesn't exist. Babies, like adults, are all individuals and all have different needs to a certain extent. If your baby seems happy and alert after his catnaps, then I'd say that his sleep schedule is perfect for him. He may gradually change to only napping 2 or 3 times per day but then all of a sudden go back to the catnaps if something like a new tooth begins to bother him.
Something that my pediatrician told me at my first appointment with my first child: No one knows your baby better than you do - you carried him for 9 months before he was born and you began to know his personality well before delivery. Mommy really does know best, and don't be afraid to trust your gut, even if it means that your child doesn't do everything according to a certain book or method.
I think her sleep schedule is only a problem if it is a problem for you. As long as you are providing her with ample opportunities to sleep in the healthy ways that are agreed upon by most doctors (comfortable, safe sleep environment, consistent bedtime routine, etc.) then you've done what you can. Every kid is different. And, my guess is that in a couple of months your baby's sleep will have consolidated a bit more.
That being said, I too had PPD, and the lack of blocks of sleep was very detrimental to my mental health. You don't say if you are breastfeeding or not, but if you are, I would encourage you to try to get your husband to give a bottle (breast milk or formula) sometime in the night (last one before bed, or in the middle of the night and let you get some uninterrupted sleep. You'd be amazed how much it helps.
A couple other tips that helped me, and might work for you. I am a huge believer in swaddling. If you aren't still swaddling (and I mean TIGHT!), try reintroducing it. It might stretch out his naps. My son slept swaddled until he was 7 or 8 months old. Make sure he's getting enough to eat before he goes down to sleep. If you are adding foods in, remember that solid food takes up a lot more space for a lot fewer calories than breastmilk/formula. So make sure he's not hungry. We use blackout blinds in my son's room so it is pretty darn dark in there. And we run an air filter which is really just a big fan for white noise.
Please take the PPD seriously. It can be a real problem, but there are really good solutions out there. PM if you want to talk about it. Good luck-- it DOES get better!
Chill out :) Your baby sounds perfect!! My son is 6 months--he sleeps at night from 1230-8ish and then wakes up to drink and goes back to sleep for a bit. (sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night and cries, but not to eat!) Then during the day he'll take like two 20 minute naps and thats it! Some babies dont nap for a long time (to my dismay as I cant get anything done around here!) And he then has enough energy to stay up playing until 1 am. It's crazy. Every baby is different!!
I also have a five month old who only likes to sleep about 20-45 min at a time, and typically won't do so in his crib. I also read the same book and I gave up on it, too much anxiety on getting everything right. I don't know if my son's sleep habits are 'normal' or not, he sleeps for 12 hours at night, usually waking only once to eat (usually after at least 6 hours of sleep), but is not a big fan of the long two hour naps. So, you are not the only one out there with this kind of child. I would also like to read responses.
I've been tracking my son's napping since he was about 2 1/2 months - hoping to find a pattern; but now that he is 4 months, the only thing that I can find that is consistent is that he naps a lot(about every 1-2 hours after waking up).
I have just started to notice a possible shift in the length of naps (shorter on average) and he hasn't readily gone down for his evening nap for the past two days, but just to prove his inconsistency, he is currently in the middle of a 2+ hour nap. This morning he took a 30 minute nap and I was like - are you kidding? you call that a nap? However, he was happy and rested and ready to get up.
Now my question (which I may end up posting) is how do you get out of the house when your child is napping all day?
