Table dancing....no Tips Please!!

E.,

Can you put a baby gate up to keep completely out of the room with the table? That may help.

Hi E. -

A couple of my kids were like this and it is a phase. Your little one is probably getting his motivation from watching all the great things his older sibs can do. One thing that will help you react with a sense of humor is to remember he is such a baby still and his goal is NOT to make your life miserable.

When my kids when through this phase, we tried a couple of different things. First, we would just lay all the chairs on their backs with the legs pointed in and push them under the table. It wasn't that hard to just position them that way when we were done eating. Secondly, we tried wrapping one of those folding play yards (like a long baby gate with hinges to help it fold) around the outside of the chairs/table and then securing them with bungi cord to keep the toddler from opening the folding gates. The latter option was more work to keep going, but it was the most effective at keeping the kids from climbing up. Once you have the chairs around the table secure somehow, make sure there aren't any other chairs or benches or boxes around that he can use to push to the table and climb up. Some kids just need you to baby-proof a little more.

Yes, you do want to teach your child that this is an unsafe thing to do, but it may take a while for him to "get it" and move on to some other interest. Every time he tries to climb up, just gently take him by the hand and say "NO, danger, ouch!" and then redirect him to something else that's interesting. This may be repetitive and annoying to you, but it's worth it to help him and train him in a gentle way.

Do you have a plastic shallow tub you can fill with cornmeal or water and let him play (supervised, of course) on the patio or deck? With the cornmeal, it's the "sand" idea--they can scoop it or run their fingers through it and it's safer to eat than sand and not as hard to clean up. That's one idea of a distraction that will be appealing to a toddler. When I was overwhelmed with a couple of my kids as toddlers, I had to make a list of all the activities/distractions I could have them do when they were getting into things so that I wouldn't have to think too much about it when I was trying to make dinner or something. I would just go to the list and see what things were listed that we hadn't already done. (Also on my list is: coloring, play doh, mega blocks, puzzles, DVDs, snacks, etc.) Another idea would be to have a special activity basket that you only get out when you really need him to be able to entertain himself for a few minutes. It's the same type of thing moms have done to help entertain their toddlers when mom is busy nursing a newborn.

If you can't keep an eye on him and you think he's going to be able to climb up even with all the precautions you have taken, then put him in a backpack carrier and wear him while you do whatever is keeping you from watching him. Or strap him into his high chair with a snack or toy for a few minutes (if he hasn't discovered how to "Hudini" his way out of the high chair and fall yet). I also thought putting up a gate to keep him out of that area was a great idea.

Good luck!
J. (mom of 5)

As a mother of another table dancer, I had no choice but to block off the kitchen with gates and the swinging door. The foam safety device on the swinging door wedged into the doorway kept him from going in, but gates also work well. We also strapped the chair legs together underneath the table so he couldn't pull them out. Or have a pack-n-play that's close, so every time you have to do work or leave the room, you have that option. Positive direction: "You can play on the floor or you may play in the pack-n-play/portacrib" is a start. Lovingly and firmly, you can correct him. "I see you need to be safe right now. You may play in here." Set him in the pack-n-play while you get your work done, then try it again at a less critical moment.

Lots of people will villify the "play pen", however, when we use it as a safe place for our kids to play (give them toys...it's not a punishment, merely another alternative), we aren't just corralling them, we are making sure that we as mothers and wives can do our housework and that our children are safe. Our kids don't always like it, but it's the same as when my son runs out into the street while I'm working on our food garden: he needs to stay safe, so I pop him into the stroller with a toy. My son is two and I know that, at some point, I need to do my work without guarding him from danger.

For what it's worth, my friend's mom once tied her to a tree while camping because she kept wandering off. (Tied one end to the tree, another to my friend, a toddler at the time.) The point is, women have been having to find ways to restrain their curious and explorative kids for years in the name of bodily safety, so don't feel guilty about doing what you need to do.:)

We bought bungee cords and bungeed the chairs to the table when not in use.

I have not been able to find the long ones since child #2, so we are still using that first long one we purchased. I haven't tried the internet or going to an auto-accessories store (bungee cords are in the auto-accessories section of Fred Meyer, being as they were originally designed as cargo-tie-downs).

This comes with the risk of someone unhooking one side of the bungee and it flinging across and whacking someone (head height for toddlers) or a window with the hard hook. This injury could be pretty extreme, and so you have to assess that risk for your family--and because of that risk I officially don't *recommend* the bungees, I just am saying, it's what we did. Perhaps a rope tie-down would work instead ...

I eventually figured out I could leave it hooked on both ends (I had been unhooking it for meals) and just manhandle it over the tops of the chairs. My kids become strong enough to get the chairs out by themselves around six years old. (Besides unhooking, you also need to watch that no kid thinks using scissors on the bungee would be funny.)

Besides bungees, I also use some folding chairs, which get folded as soon as someone leaves the table. I should put them to the side, but normally we put them under the table (I don't recommend that--it makes it a pain to clean up dropped food). I can't use folding chairs at all the seating positions because they don't hold boosters safely.

As long as I've cleared all boxes and stools from the area, no more toddler table-dances (except when someone left a chair unbungeed or set up, which is rare).

I did a compromise.. I let my daughter dance on the coffee table but disaplined her for the kitchen table..

Congrats! you have a mountain climber in the family!

I had a climber. He figured out how to scoot the stool up to the counter so he could climb up on top of the refrigerator!

I think you should put your youngest in gymnastics as soon as possible, he sounds like a real scrapper. I think he will bring you much joy and much angst.

I would not discipline him. I would find alternate places for him to climb. Get an outdoor climbing gym and tell him that he can climb outside, but not inside.

I would provide him with something that is safe to climb on, as climbing is a normal part of his development.

My son started that at 9 months! So I understand. Like others have said, he may just need a place where he can climb and feel adverturious, a small toddler clomber might help.

Can you turn the table upside down while it's not in use? If it's not too heavy, maybe that's an option...