Suggestions on How to Get My 2 1/2 Year Old Daughter to Sleep More

Do you work out side the home? Because I know when my kids were little and I had the same thing I would let them crawl in bed with me if and only if it was after 5am. They then would go to sleep in my bed until 8 or 9 in the morning. Even though she is only 2 the fact another one is coming she is going to have her clingy time. I am a mother of 4 and all my children are 2 years apart. My one daughter use to love to lay on my stomach and would fall asleep like that she would like to have it bare though. I hope this makes sense. I just got on this site for the first time so I hoped I helped.

M., I had to start setting a timer for my daughter's naps. I am not sure how long yours sleeps. My daughter would sleep 3 hours if I let her. Around age 2 I cut them down to 2 hours, then at 2 1/2 to 1 hour and now at age 3 I had to cut them out completely. She doesn't get up till 9am (it has always been like that) but she was still rocking and rolling till 11pm or midnight most nights. I did not think she would handle no nap at age 3 but it has done wonders. We do our routine around 9pm and low and behold she is out by 9:30pm. I cuddle with her till she crashes. She goes and goes all day long. And I can't let her fall asleep in the car or like today she will be up to all hours. Once she crashes it is done (you can't get her back up). We have black out shades in all our bedrooms too.

You are doing everything right. You definitely need to let her cry only because you shouldn't let her force you to stay with her until she's asleep. I think you also should implement discipline when the crying starts, because it is a form of a tantrum. This will discourage her from doing it sooner than letting her cry only. I know it's hard, because you want bedtime to be special, but if you are firm, this will pass and it will be the nice end to the day as it should be. She needs instruction. Good luck, sleep is VERY important to your sanity and health! As far as not sleeping long enough, this will pass too. Eventually she'll need to cstch up on her sleep. The lessened trauma and adrenaline at night may even help her sleep longer. Watch her diet too-not sugar after noon-better yet-none. And be sure she is getting enough exercise during the day so she's tired at night. Good luck!

M., I went through the same thing with my now 8yr old. Well, I was a single mom until she was 3yr and she slept with me before this. I tried this and it worked wonders.
Night 1: sit on her bed until she is asleep.
Night 2: sit in middle of room.
Night 3: at the door.
When she gets out of bed the 1st time tell her it's bedtime and take her back to her bed. After that don't talk to her just put her back in bed. (I would sometimes kiss her head, just for reassurance.)
This took about a month but it worked for my very stubborn little girl. I firmly believe that every child is different and need different methods. Just trust your "mommy feelings" and be consistant in whatever method you choose. You can get all the advice in the world but you know what's best for your little one and it will get easier. My girl has successfully been sleeping by herself for 5 yrs!!:)

I assume your daughter takes an afternoon nap? My son will be 2 next month. He gets up around 6am, sometimes earlier. He is very active all morning, but by 10:30am, he is ready for a nap. He sleeps till around 1:30pm, then is very active all afternoon. We bathe him around 6pm, then let him run around some more with his sister. He is ready for bed no later than 7:30pm and sleeps pretty much all night. He wakes around 2am for a drink, but goes right back to sleep. You may be missing the cues that your daughter is ready for bed and then once you miss that small window, it is very hard for her to go to sleep because she is overtired. Also, you might consider making the bedtime routine a little shorter. Of course brush her teeth, but just do one short story, a short prayer and one verse of a song. Like: Goodnight, sleep tight, I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight, sleep tight, I'll see you in the morning and leave her room. You may be engaging her too much. Good luck. :)

Hi M.
Does alot of light come into your daughter's room in the morning? My son was the same way until I bought room darkening curtains. He is also not a great sleeper. I gave up and now lay with him until he falls asleep at night. He used to get so upset he would vomit when it was time for bed. My pediatrition said he would grow out of it, but it wasn't worth it. Sometimes you have to do what is best for you to keep your sanity.

It is ok if your daughter cries for more than 50 minutes. Sometimes they can go for an hour or two but remember, your daughter is safe and the screaming won't last forever :-)
I would also recommend starting your routine earlier and adjusting her bedtime earlier. Be consistent, do the same thing every night. Have you tried white noise and black out curtains (available at Walmart) to keep her room dark to prevent her from waking?
I would also recommend a book called The Sleepeasy Solution by Jennifer Waldburger. It deals with every immaginable sleep issue and is easy to read. I found it very helpful when I sleep trained my daughter and I got excellent results.
I hope this helps. Best of luck.
R.

You sound like a lucky mom of a hyperactive child. Does she get a lot and I mean a lot of physical activity during the day? I was a hyperactive child and being outside was my world when I was younger. Does she help with chores? Two is not too young to get her to help you to sort clothes, put them in the washer together, and other chores you can think of that you could do with her. Swingsets, parks, walks are all stimulating but may put a dent in her energy department.
Naps: short ones. You want her to sleep at night. If all else fails, consult pediatrician.

My suggestion is to start your routine earlier and let her cry it out. Or use SuperNanny's method of gradually working your way out of the room. My son would wake up earlier when we put him to bed later...although no one believed me except my husband. The later we put him to bed the earlier he got up. I think you have to get her to fall asleep on her own and get her to bed earlier. It won't be easy and you have to be determined...the worst thing you can do is cave in to her crying. It will only set you back. If she knows her crying will get her what she wants she will only cry more. It usually took about 3-5 days to get my son to start a new thing like sleeping on his own. If we were consistent for 3-5 days it always paid off. You will need lots of patience and support from anyone in the household. It won't be easy but it will be worth it. I hope you can get more sleep soon!

We got a CD player and a CD of childrens songs for our daughter. We turn on her "fishy light" (it rotates around so it looks like the fish are swimming) and then turn on her CD (it's also fish and water themed songs) so it plays softly. That has helped her from staying up so late. Sometimes she also picks out a book to look at after we leave the room. A lot of times we go in to turn off the light and CD and find her asleep half way through the book.

Some tempermants absolutely are damaged by the conventional wisdom of the past 50 yrs to CIO or cry-it-out.
The stress hormones are dramatically elevated, AND it can even adversely affect brain development. granted some personalities survive that rough method and seem fine.

THEN, to add insult to injury there then becomes a negative sleep association.
and NOW they are afraid/nervous (albiet unconsciously) to even go to that dark place, called bed - where my cries are ignored and i am not comforted like in the daytime.

Try the Dr. Sears books like "The Sleep Book" or Elizabeth Pantley's "No-Cry Sleep Solution". There are definitely others. But AVOID any that suggest CIO for your particular little girl.

M.,
you ALL need more than 6-1/2 hrs of sleep a night! :)
I would suggest to you that you put her to bed MUCH earlier if she is getting up that early in the morning. If you get her in bed by 7 or 7:30 and she screams for an hour she'll still be getting 2 more hours of sleep each night. Does she nap? If not, consider doing an hour of "quiet time" in her room in the afternoon--play quietly, listen to music, look at books, watch a DVD, etc. A lot of times, even though it defies logic, the earlier the bedtime, the longer a kid sleeps! Also, I think you should choose a night time method and stick to it til this nonsense is over--whether you do Cry It Out or something else, get a plan and do it. Period. You will have a really hard time come #2 if you don't get this resolved soon.
Cry it Out is difficult, but it's a terrible 3 or 4 nights (like they aren't already?) and then you're done. Stick to a plan and you will get her past this! Good luck!

Hi M.. Keep with your ritual, but cut it back a bit. One book is enough and singing should be done early(especially if she sings with you). Do not interact with your daughter once you have put her to bed. (If she gets out of bed siletly put her back in to bed etc.) If you need to sit in the room move closer to the door every day until you are out of the room. Do you have a night light in her room? Has Dad ever put her to bed and does he have the same issues? Are there many toys in her room that she can play with to keep herself awake? Does she play in her room durring the day? We never encouraged our girls to play in their room and we kept all toys except for a few stuffed animals out of their rooms as well...until they were school aged anyway! Good luck and best wishes!

My thought is "This all sounds SO familiar!" We went through this when my kids were ready to give up naps. They were impossible to put to bed at night, up at the crack of dawn, and literally cranky all day long. I hated the thought, and miss that time to myself, but it made the house run more smoothly!

If your daughter still takes naps, (not all kids need them at 2 1/2) it may be time to give them up. If she is getting all the sleep she needs during the day, she will not need it at night.

My warning is this: The first week sucks! But after about 7 or 8 days, you and your kids get into the routine of not napping and the whold world is better!

Good luck!

My 22 month old son was getting up at about 6 in the mornings and we hung dark curtains over his shades. He sleeps til 8 - 8:30 now and today he slept til 9! I don't have any help on the other end, we are very fortunate to have a great sleeper. Sometimes babies who are over tired sleep less, sounds weird but once we started putting our son down earlier, he slept later too. Good luck!