Stuck and Scared

Try to break things down one by one and take them on that way instead of trying to hit them all headfirst. Stress can do a lot. Trust me. It is normal for children to get sick around others, my oldest had strep so many times, even after she had her tonsils out and still gets it here and there & my youngest gets it frequently, but there isn't a bubble big enough for the two of them to keep them from growing & being children. As far as things went with your mom, you gave it your all, that is all anyone can expect of us. I have ulcerative colitis so i'm familiar w/ibs & i realize it can be hard, but it can be managed at times and sometimes not so well so you have to get under the care of a dr who can get things working for you and you have to realize that not everything in life is worth worrying about. Easier said then done, I agree, but sometimes you have to dance in the rain though...right. My husband has worked a steady 2nd job since the time we were married, even a 3rd at times, it takes away in such a way that you don't ever take notice of. If he's not sleeping now, how would he even do it and honestly i am thankful my husband helps out around the house but i feel guilty when he does because i feel as though he works hard all day, the least i could do is have that done. But he has the attitude that this is a 50/50 thing, the house, the girls, everything. I think that once we stop being so hard on ourselves most of the nerve issues resolve themselves. Best of luck to you.

ask your GI to test you for celiac. if your IBS symptoms are not going away, it could be something else. google celiac and see if you match the symptoms etc.

you could also have adrenal fatigue from the chronic stress you've endured so many years to now.

i would google both of those and begin to get your life back. you deserve it.

For the IBS, have you tired...

1) An antispasmotic? go to your doctor and ask for a prescription. You can take one when youre having a bad tummy day and it will calm down your stomach. if you cant see a doctor, try peppermint tea, which acts as a natural antispasmotic. or, you can take peppermint pills. Its a capsule with peppermint oil in it which acts as a natural antispasmotic. Ive had luck with these ones: http://www.helpforibs.com/shop/suplmts/pmintcaps.asp

2) A hypnosis program? Ive had great luck with self hypnosis that works with IBS. Such as this one seen here: http://www.helpforibs.com/shop/books/hypnoibs.asp

(you can also get this stuff on amazon.com)

3) Have you tried a gluten free diet? My symptoms got soooo much better when I went on a oat, wheat, rye, barley free diet.

4) Tried a probiotic supplement? Probiotics are great to help digestion.

Remember, much of the immune system is in the digestive tract so if you dont have a healthy digestion tract, youre not going to have a top notch immunity.

T.-sorry that you are going through all of this. I really think that the very best thing that you can do for yourself is to seek counseling-you need to work through so much here and also find tools for dealing with your high stress level. I really don't see your situation improving without it. Your daughter and your husband deserve at least an attempt on your part to do this one thing that could help make the world of difference. If you can't afford it then I would suggest a pastor or priest to talk to.

T.....welcome to Mamapedia!!! It really is a great community of Moms ( and Grandmas!!). I agree Gerri...take things one step at a time...I wonder if you would be able to build up your daughters immunity by gradually exposing her to more and more people...so that her body gets a chance to strengthen her immune response. I am not saying find someone with the mumps and set her down next to them...but let her be around healthy young folks her age.
As to your IBS...there are things that can be done to manage it...does your family have health insurance through your husband's job...or would you qualify for medicaid through the state in order to get access to some of the quality medical care that you need. If you get to feeling better then you can take some of the pressure off of your husband by taking over more things at home!!
Your Mom...it sounds to me like you did a wonderful job of taking care of her for as long as you could...I work in a Pharmacy and you would not believe how many elderly, ill people have no family that is willing to help them out in the least...much less take them in and have them live with them!!! So don't feel guilty about that...if things got beyond what you could help her with then it was best that you found another situation for her.
Sit down together with your husband and go over your budget...maybe there are places that you can cut corners that you were not aware of. Maybe there is a job you could do from home...to add to the family income...but be careful...so many of those work at home things are just ways to get your money!!!
Do you have a local church that you attend? They can be such a wonderful source of friendship and emotional support!! You need to find someone locally that you can talk to , a friend who will give you a willing ear and a shoulder lean on. It will make life so much more pleasant and positive for you!!
Good luck to you and God Bless

I also have had IBS and totally understand how miserable it is- go to a gastroenterologist. There are medications they can prescribe that will help so you don't have to feel like a shut in any more. It will make a big difference in your life.
Best wishes =o)

T., it sounds like you need to find a support network. I would suggest that you look at several avenues. First, if you are a person of faith, try looking for a church that nourishes your soul. If traditional churches aren't your thing, you might try a Universalist type of church. For your home, try www.flylady.net. It is a way to get organized and she even has a special section for homeschoolers. Finally, there are several online homeschooling groups. I'm sure you can find one that can give the additional support. Good luck.

I have a daughter and son with immune deficiency. They get sick when they are near sick people and they are in public school. Your pediatrician needs to do and immunology test on her to see if her her levels are low. Also they need to do a test on her pneumonia titers(not sure on the proper name of this test) Every time my daughter is sick she is down for an average of 2 weeks. The last time she missed 5 weeks of school. There are doctors who specialize in this. I understand what you are going through. My daughter has been dealing with this for three years and she is 16. It is very stressful and if it was the only thing I had to worry about then maybe it would be better but my 13 year old has had health issues too. I have recently went on anxiety medicine to manage the stress. I was tired of not sleeping at night and being tired all day. It has helped a lot. I did at one point take my daughter to counseling because of the stress between the two of us. Thank fully my husband has been supportive and insists I need to be home because of the kids' issues. Support networks are really helpful. Friends have been very supportive. Hope everything gets better for you.

T. how old is your daughter? maybe she will build her immune system if you put her in school, What does the Dr say about putting her in school? I would deal with that issue as it would be less stress on you if she could attend school and if home is a stressful place where mom has health issues than school would be such a fun an joyful place for her with friends, art, music, library and gym class and recess in the fresh air. she shouldnt be a shut in while you deal with your health issue