Strange Fears

My suggestion would be watch for other signs and look on teh autism spectrum. Look for things such as pdd or asbergers.

IS there a change in her hearing? Maybe she has had somekind of a blockage and now things are seem much louder than they had been. THere may be something to the pitch of the sound as well. Just a thought I hope it gets better soon for you and her....

My advice would be to ask Shelby why these things scare her. Perhaps you could make a game out of them. Like tell her to close the blinds and you will make a bed and the one that gets done first wins a treat. It could be just enough of an incentive to move the blinds. I would sit down and talk with her. Only she knows what is going on inside. Good luck. Shannon

Hi, L..
Ignoring and negating her feelings/fears by saying "oh, it is just blinds, nothing to worry.." don't make her fears go away. They will make her learn that negative feelings like fears need to be suppressed and she will start to internalize, which could create emotionally unhealthy adult. If adults around her belittle and negate her feelings, she will start to think there is something wrong with her and she should not feel the way she does, and that will affect her self-esteem in the future.

Her fears are not strange to her, and her parents and caregivers need to acknowledge and validate her feeling no matter how strange and irrational they are to you. Then she will feel free to feel what she feels and be ready to move on, when she realizes "herself" how irrational her fears are. You can also accomodate her and ask her if she wants those object of her fear put away for a while.
Otherwise, her supressed fear will manifest in other ways.
Of course if you see other signs, seek medical professional's advise. At first, try validating her feelings (don't add your feeling to them), and listen and give her attentions. See how that will help.
Good luck,
--M.

I do not agree that you should not address this fear with your daughter or that she is doing it for attention. Your daughter is obviously very afraid and needs your comfort during her time of fear. My son, who is 22 months, has become afraid of things as well. It is a normal part of development and it will go away. They may seem like silly things to be a afraid of but toddlers are exploring their world and learning what the things in their environment are. Not all of these items make sense to them so then they become scared. Obviously if it doesn't go away, gets worse, or becomes a phobia you should talk to your doctor. Also ask the sitter if anything scary happened while she was in her care. Here is an article I found as well.

http://www.babycenter.com/0_easing-your-toddlers-fears_##...

You said that the babysitter ignores her and that works best. Has she stopped acting that way for her sitter? If she can turn it on and off depending on who's with her I would feel she is not really afraid. If she was really afraid it would not matter if you ignored her or not, she would be afraid. If a child in my care is afraid of something I try to let them know before I do it. Like running the dishwasher. Then I keep telling them it is ok. After the dishwasher is done running I take them over there to show them everything is ok.
I would talk to the doctor also. My niece was afraid of loud sounds also and they found out it was because she could not process what the noise was. She was able to over come this and she's now 19 and in college to be a teacher.

You know that is funny because my daughter started the same thing about Shelby's age. She still does it from time to time. (she is now 3)
My first reaction to some of her behavior was to ask questions. What do you see? Why can't I do this? etc.. However, you have to understand I am a paranormal investigator. Now mind you I would not say that you are dealing with anything like this. I think she is going through a stage where she wants to control things. Being independent andwhen something doesn't fly her way she gets upset. (which I found is why my daughter was behaving in that manner)
I would not ignore her and I would not console her completely. I suggest perhaps having her help you or say well come help me.
As far as the fears of balloons and so forth. It may be the sounds they make when they float about. I would have her hearing checked to see if she is sensitive. Could be the sounds irritate her so she reacts by screaming or throwing a fit.
My little one LOVES music in the car but only if I am driving. If dad is driving forget it. We can't listen to it. Kids can react in strange ways over things. Silly as it seems to us it is just there way of seeing how far they can go sometimes.
I'm not sure if this helps but I would highly recommend an ear doc for her. My nephew has problems with sounds and used to react like that.
Good luck dear.
M. Hayes

You may want to talk to her ped. It sounds like perhaps her hearing is kicking into overdrive. I'm not sure. Did a loud noise scare her that started all this off? Seems like if it was her hearing, you'd have noticed it by now. However, I'm not a doc, so what do I know...HA!

I sounds like she has been exposed to some type of sound that has scared her to death. Has she been around adults arguing,firecrackers,slamming doors or something of this nature? You will just have to work her through it. One item at a time. I don't think ignoring it will help. I would seek a pedi's counciler. You don't want this to get worse and it could have lasting effect if you don't handle it right. A child being fearful at that age needs the right guidance. Tell your sitter to take the extra time and comfort her not ignore her. The child is scared!!! She is not throwing a fit. I would also make a few pop in visits at the sitters house. I don't know her and she may be a great and loving sitter but with choosing to ignore the issue makes me wonder what else she chooses to ignore. I have been down a similar road and I though my child was a great grandma type sitter until the day I picked up my child and her bottem so black and blue from a hair brush she could not sit down. Don't take the chance. It's just a few pop in visits L.. Later I found out my daughter had ADD and that explains why she was so rebellious but that still was no excuse for what was done to her. Just check it out. What can it hurt?

You might ask your MD about checking her out for sensory processing issues. It's when their brains process sensory info (like touch, sound, taste) in different ways than is typical. My daughter has SPD, and loud or unexpected noises are more startling for her than most kids. She also loves extra sour foods (lemon, pickle. It's something that we started to notice at around 16-18 months. It's all manageable, just something you need to diagnose so you can deal with it in ways that make your child more comfortable with the incoming info. Good Luck!

My son also outgrew sensitivity to sounds. His siblings didnt have this issue but then they were born into a noisier home.I would have the babysitter console her as you do. It is only natural for us to get louder or more intense if we are ignored.

I would discuss this with her pediatrician.

My daughter is 21 months old, and my son just turned three. For a little while, my son had fears of noises, and other random things. The way we dealt with it, was to make it more of a game. We would tell him we're making the noise, then make it, and then say, "What's that?!?" and then look around for what it might be. It's hard to describe it in writing. But it made it more of a fun thing to hear new sounds and try new things. We are now doing the same thing with my daughter, and my son helps, too!

From your description, though, it doesn't seem like it's exactly the same as ours. Seems like there is more sensitivity for your daughter. Maybe, like someone said, her hearing is kicking in to overdrive. Or maybe she has some sort of migraine issues and these sounds kick them off. I don't know--I would suggest talking to her doctor about it.

Good luck to you!

As soon as I started reading your request, the first thing I thought of was "wow, this girl must be receiving some major attention for these lash outs". If you're consoling her, you're only rewarding the behavior. She's not really afraid of the blinds, etc....she likes the attention she gets from you when she says she is afraid of those things. If she's shaking, crying, screaming, it's the same as you promoting that type of behavior when she's throwing a tantrum in the middle of walmart for not getting that toy she wanted. Just calmly say to her "don't be silly, that's just a toy" with a smile on your face, and then walk away. Don't give her a reason to carry on and on like that, or else she'll do just that....carry on. I was a little confused about the dismissing her thing because if you're playing into her game, you're actually dismissing good behavior and allowing bad behavior to take its place. It's worth a shot, even if you think you're ignoring her isn't good for her because you can't allow her to grow up thinking that it's okay to be afraid of such things, but keep in mind that it will take a few days of not reacting to her "fears" before she actually gives up and realizes she's not going to get rewarded for them before she'll actually stop, and that's only if you're consistently not playing into them.

Hi L.,

My son had some strange fears also, I have no idea where they came from. He was afraid of hand statues, little toy figures, mechanical toys. It was so very odd. We went to this one restaurant that had a big white hand statue on a shelf and he started crying and went under the table and would not come out. We tried talking to him to see why he was all of a sudden afraid of these things, but I dont even know if he knew at the time. We really tried our best to avoid these things, if we were somewhere where we encountered something that caused this reaction in him we would try to cover the item up or face a way so he wouldnt see it. We would try to sooth him telling him that it is only a toy and couldnt hurt him. The good news is he grew out of those fears. I think he was around the same age as your daughter when he started feeling that way, and I want to say within a year or two ( and I cant remember exactly how long )-- he wasnt afraid any more. He is 13 now and doesnt have any irrational fears. He is just fine now- a really great kid.

Good luck-- Hang in there.

L.,

Have you had her hearing checked? She may be hypersensitive to sounds. My son, who is now 9, had that similar thing. The doctor said that he would outgrow it, his little ears just couldn't take the sound fluctuations. Well, he did outgrow it, by 3!! Good Luck to you.

C.
____@____.com

It's my opinion that she has an imbalance within herself. I've taken my son to see a homeopathic Dr. for his eczema and he has responded so well to homeopathic treatment (a natural medicine that's non toxic and has no side effects). I've started studying homeopathy to use for colds and flu and minor injuries, etc. I've read that emotional upsets such as your DDs and other behavior issues (e.g. ADHD, meanness, hitting, separation anxiety, etc.) can be helped tremendously by homeopathy. If you're interested in checking it out, see this website of our homeopath in Naperville, Dr. Josephine Polich (www.dupagehomeopathic.com). She's giving a free informational talk on Sat. 1/26 from 1-3pm at Knox Church in Naperville, 1105 Catalpa Ln near Trader Joes. Her website has the information on the talk too.

Well, I can relate, my son turned 2 in Sept. also and a couple weeks ago began being afraid of the strangest things. He's now afraid of any fuzz, lint, hair,etc. Also he's afraid of ladybugs, polar bears being in the house. We just reassure him that fuzzies are not scary and throw them away. It was actually funny the other night cause he walked past a feather that must have come from his pillow and it looked like it was floowoing him cause the feather moved. He ran away screaming and crying. It was so funny and I had to laugh. I think it's just a stage and they will grow out of it, but it's not anything to stress about. Hope this is some comfort to you.

You should talk to your doctor. Some kids have actual problems with noises--they can become amplified in their heads and make them truly uncomfortable. Please don't dismiss or ignore it. She's trying to tell you something.

I agree with the other posters who recommend a hearing evaluation. My daughter was also very sensitive and afraid of noise. Some of it may be that they don't understand what caused the noise or are easily startled, but some of it may be fear because of an actual pain or uncomfortable sensation in their head. Get it checked out. If you rule out anything physically wrong, then try to allow her to control as much of the noise as you can - turn on the tv for you, etc. and explain what she can't control. For the longest time we couldn't go outside. My daughter would want to, but then we would walk out and she would hear a siren or motorcycle,or just become absolutely hysterical and I could never identify the trigger. Finally after a very long time I figured out that the shadows from the tree branches moved whenever there was a breeze. She was looking on the ground and saw these strange shadow shapes moving around and was afraid to step on or go by them. My point is that they don't process things the same as us, and may not understand why something happens, but be unable to articulate the fear. Please do not ignore her. She needs to know she can come to you if she is scared. You do not want her to start repressing her fears, or it may lead to further problems down the road.

I don't know if this will help, but when my son was a baby, he had senosry issues. Mostly it was noises, like firetrucks, alarms, lawnmower, etc. He eventually grew out of it. What we had to do if we knew the noise was going to happen, we had to prepare him for it or leave if we thought he couldn't handle it. He had this condition when he was born though. Unlike you daughter who recently has taken on these fears.My son's diagnoses was called sensory integration dysfunction. I hope this helps a little. Best of luck

K. S

Hey Linsay,

If I were you I would take her to the Doctors and get her hearing checked. When I was yonger I watched this little boy who had similar actions. Needless to say the Doctors said he had epilepsy- This did not make sense to his family. They took him to another Doc. They found out that he had a hearing problem caused by an infection that was never taken care of. They treated him and with some extra help through a speech therapist he was on his road to recovery. So it could be nothing but childhood fears or there could be a medical reason for it. Better to be safe.

Has she had her ears checked?? I know my daughter responded differently to loud noises because of a hearing problem. Also look into Sensory integration disfunction. She may just be sensitive to sounds. Of course she is two and it may just be a control thing that she wants to turn on the tv or she wants to shut the blinds. Try before you shutting the blinds ask her to help you. She may just not have the words to say I want to do it too. Just some ideas.

I remember this all too well. My oldest was afraid of mannequins, bees, bugs, clowns, velvet pictures, horse heads, pacifiers and anything hanging on a wall. Our life was bland for a while, but we always took his fears seriously. It lasted from age 2 until about 3.5 years old. Now that he is older he has told us "Thanks for taking those stupid ideas I had seriously and for not making fun of me". Oh, and by the way, he has a child of his own with many of the same "fears". Makes you wonder if it is genetic in some way. I do not believe that ignoring it makes it go away.

I hope I can help. This is free advise and you get what you pay for =)
You are not dismissing your daughter, just her unreasonable fears. Is she looking for your attention? Sometimes when a parent works a kids will act out for attention they feel deprived of. Not that your depriving her at all. I have ignored my own kids bad behavior and it works. Not the same day but the behavior dwindled and he tries other ways to "get my goat".
If a sound bothers her she may have sensitive ears. I can hear some alarm systems in department stores so loudly I have to leave. It's an ear drum piercing tone. Some electronic games make my head spin literally. I feel like I'm on an elevator dropping to the basement. I don't know that is what she hears. You can take her to an ENT for a hearing test. You know your child better than anyone ever will. Even you doctors. You will always know when something is bothering her and if she is mad at it or really just upset.
Try putting a sheer curtain where the blinds are during the day, at night close them. Talk to her when she is calm and ask her why she feels fear of these things. Balloons may pop and maybe she feels the anticipation of that.
If she doesn't learn to live with noise she will have a very hard time once she gets into school. If it's only inside noises (at home) try taking her for walks, or walk around a mall or go someplace with noise but nothing loud that could be surprising or shocking. Good Luck
L. S.

Hi L.:

Having read other responses, I'm happy to see the majority say not to ignore it.

It could be physical, mechanical re. ears.

And like the mom of the child with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) said, it could be that. If you take her to your pediatrician, s/he may or may not know about the disorder. Keep going 'til you find someone who can help with it.

SPD means the child/person perceives &/or processes differently than others re. the sensory input in their environment. It's treatable.

And, it could just be fears and you're safe and loving to help her deal with it.

If it should turn out to be SPD, there's a wonderful, very readable book by a pre-school teacher, Carol Stock-Kranowitz. It called The Out of Synch Child. Has explanations about the different sensory systems and what to do if your child is under- or over-responsive within that sensory system.

Good luck, Jennifer H