D.B.
Based on your prior questions, particularly the last one, I think you need to get away from your husband asap. He is manipulative and abusive, he pressures you sexually, and he has bizarre ideas of what your "wifely duties" are. By refusing to leave until he has a piece of paper that says he has to, he keeps you in the same house with him. If a "piece of paper" came, what makes you think he would obey it?
Your attorney says you won't risk losing any stake in the house if you take the kids and leave. But you want to stay because they are next door to your husband's brother and his kids? If the kids are close, they can continue to see each other. Even if your husband isn't talking to that brother, it's hard to know what will happen if you separate and divorce. Sometimes people feel they need to take sides in a divorce, and there's no guarantee that the brother will choose you over your husband.
Take the essentials - your jewelry, any valuables, any sentimental things that your think your husband might destroy (kids' baby pictures, their special drawings, your family photographs, any heirlooms from your family's side, anything comforting to the kids like their special toys or stuffed animals). Take at least 50% of the money in the bank and get things out of the safety deposit box, and open an account in your own name. Use a post office box for bank statements and other communications from financial companies and your lawyer. Stay with a friend, in a short-term rental, or in an extended stay residence hotel while you look for something else.
You are staying next to cousins for your children's sake. But what your children need most of all is a healthy, stable mother and the knowledge that she is strong and will protect them from an erratic, abusive father. Don't let them grow up watching you be a doormat, and with a man who is likely to get even more angry as he loses control over his wife.
On airplanes, the safety instructions tell you to put the oxygen mask on yourself first, and then take care of your children. That applies in the rest of life as well.