Started kindergarten...ouch..my Heart Hurts So Bad!

HI I can totally relate I am a mom of 3 as well My son started kindergarten and I just felt sooo sad he loves it and has been in this school since he was 3 in a pre k program but I guess I am feeling a bit depressed that he is growing up sooo fast now I also have a 28mth old little boy and a 14mth old litte girl I work per diem on weekends It is very tough right now raising 3 how are you managing?

Hi D.,

Our daughter started Kind. this morning...she got off the bus about 1/2 hour ago and was as excited then as she was when she got in the bus this am...

I'm a SAHM, and have literally been with her every single day...so her being gone from 7 - 3 is a HUGE block of time to be without her...BUT, it has to happen...sad as it is, they grow way too fast...

I was sad this morning thinking about all the times I was short with her, or yelled when I shouldn't have...that bothered me a lot...the battles over sleeping we had when she was small...as parents, I think we need to worry less and relax, enjoy and love as much as we can...because before we know it...they're gone...poof, just like that. I'm going to try to remember my feelings from today and not sweat the small stuff anymore.

Best wishes to you...and good luck tomorrow!

J.

I feel you. You are going through what I(or any working mom) goes through much earlier. It is a struggle, and it does get better. I used to cry everyday driving home from work, but eventually you come to terms with things. Best of luck to you, this is also great training when they are all out of the house and in school. Try to come up with some things for you, because there will be a day when they are all in school. Just thank god that he likes it, and he will get so much out of this. It would be unthinkable if he hated it. Good luck to you.

Dear D.,
I understand exactly how you feel. I felt the same way when my children started kindergarden - then elementary, high school, and finally college. My saving grace was that I kept reminding myself that each step was another new and exciting adventure to growing up for them, not for me. They had the opportunity to face new challenges, meet new people, and grow as a person - and they were loving it! I looked forward to being there when they got home.
It seems unfair that when the children become that "fun" age, the school takes them away. But it's all part of life. When our youngest went off to college 3 years ago, my husband admitted to me that he was proud of me. He said that he imagined I would be one of those moms who would not let the kids go easily, but I had let them go each step of the way. Was it easy? - No, but it was important for them. It's part of parenting.
I give you credit for feeling the way you do, rather than those parents who can't wait to send their kids away. Enjoy every day of their childhood - it passes quickly. Also remember, when you let them go, they will always come home.
You will survive just fine. W.

Hey there D., I think I remember you. I think either I gave you advice or vice-versa. Anyway, I went througt that with my older son TWICE! Yes he did kindergarten two times. I knew he had a disability with learning early on. It was a gut feeling. I watched him stand outside that door on day one with his head down and on the verge of tears. I think he knew too as soon as the other kids laughed and made fun of him. Talk about aching...I was a wreck on the playgroud in front of other parents and children. I could not control myself. I felt like I was feeding my first born to the wolves. Turned out he had severe ADHD! And the teacher was old and impatient. She turned her back on him and dropping him off everyday was torture! So I know how you feel. Try to plan something little and special for him everday for when he gets home. You'll be thinking about how happy he'll be and he'll be excited about it everyday.

I completely understand your sadness, my son starts Kindergarten on Monday and my 2 yr old starts nursery school 2 mornings a week on Tues. They are taking the bus together, but I am so anxious. No real advise other than you are NOT alone!!!
Good luck
LeeAnn

I really feel for you. When my 1st born was ready for school, I talked to her about it, what to expect and all. The day came, I cried all the way home. When I picked her up after school, she said she loved it and wasnted to go back the same day. This made me more sad. As the days wore on, I was able to calm down. It's a natural process. As for the sleeping? I was a walking zombie for about 6 years between my 2 girls. You are doing a good job. The pain and the sleep will come, tho not as soon as you want, but it is all woth it. My 1st has her masters, my second, all lively and active (I was really tired, lol) just came back from Africa with worldteach and will be leaving in 6 months to Australia for grad school.........it doesn't get beter than this, but now I miss them as babies.

Just keep telling yourself that it is harder on you than on him - focus on the kids at home- the days will go by faster and faster and when he starts bringing home those cute projects and singing songs he learned in Music - you'll be feeling more at ease. It will get better. It took me months to feel at ease with my daughter being "out of my control" but she loved school so much it made it much easier for me to be without her during the day.

Oh D. I am with you. They just started all day kindergarten here and it's breaking my heart. With my oldest we put him in pre-K first and then K when he was turning 6 and it was still a half day. My 5 year old really wanted to go to K this year though and he is more ahead than my older was at this point but it's killing me that it's all day.

Sending hugs your way too!

L.

My daughter started kindergarden yesterday. For the most part, it was okay. She started to cry, but i took off faster. It stunk. Well, today when we arent allowed in the classroom, my daughter latched on to me screaming she didnt want to go. Then, I tooked to the teacher for help and the teacher wouldnt help me. She gave me the shoulder shrug. When my son started, there was a little girl that cried and the teacher took her. I started to get upset...The first day was bad, but this was wayyyyy toooo much for me. Finally, after what seemed like FOREVER, I pushed her in the classroom and took off. The teacher had no choice but to keep her in. All the while, my daughter screaming, "mommy dont leave me". I did everything to make this transition smoothly, but she is shy. She is my middle one. My heart is so breaking right now. I am so mad that the teacher. She should have told the parents who did not read the paper the day before about snack money to wait a minute to help me. It was horrible. (not being a teacher basher). I really needed her help this morning and even asked and she told me to wait. My heart is absolutely broken. I feel the same as you. I guess we will get used to it???

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!! My daughter did Pre-School and I cried and she didn't! It is one step towards growing up and that is soooooo hard to accept!!! I totally understand your heartache so it may not make it better but know you are not alone! A.

I'm glad to know that I'm not the only mom out there that actually cried after I dropped my son off at kindergarten. He is my last baby and I already miss all of the alone time we had while my older son was at school and my husband was at work. It makes me so desperate to have another baby but, I cannot have anymore children because I had sepsis during my last pregnancy which forced me to miscarry and it ruined all chances of ever getting pregnant again. Children are such a blessing and I am thankful that it didn't take me until they grew up to realize it. I guess we'll just have to treasure our alone time with them even more now, since it will be fewer and farther in between.

Hi D.!! Oooh! How I know how you feel!!! My son is in first grade this year, but last year was a hard transitio for us!! He did great the first day or two but then started crying he didn't want to go. He was scared of the lunch room (too may kids and too loud!!!). He also said that it took too long for me or daddy to come get him!(tugged on our heart strings!!) so I went into lunch with him one day and he did better after that. I know you said your son loved it and that's great!!! It's a hard adjustment for us mommies to make!!! Pretty soon, you'll appreciate the time he gets to spend away from his siblings as it will make him miss them and hopefully get along better with them when he gets home!!!! Hang in there!! PS, I cried too!!!

Wow, it hurts to let go, doesn't it! I know exactly how you feel, and although it is just an affirmation of how much you love him, it still hurts that we can't be with them all the time. When I feel like that, I try to do something that makes me feel close to my sons, whether it is scrapbooking (which usually makes me smile looking at all those pictures), or even cleaning out their closets. Just something so that I still feel like I am taking care of them and doing something for them. My heart goes out to you, but just know that he will be back at the end of the day, and your other two can have extra mommy time

Hi D.,

I know exactly hw you feel! When my girl started Kindergarten, I cried for two days, and was even having panic attacks. I have never had one of those before or since. I had troble breathing and everything! She was fine, she loved school, but I took it really hard. Now she is in second grade. She is doign great, and so am I. It does get easier. I think it is just the culture shock, especially for stay at home moms, that really gets to us. Kindergarten means that our baby is growing up. The child is gone durig the day, and we cant go with. It is hard, and I found it extremely depressing, rather then happy and exciting. My son is 3. I REALLY hope I dont respod the same way when he starts! hehe

Hang in there, I knwo it is hard, but it will get better. Maybe you can videotape an interview with your son when he gets home from school either today, or at the end of the week. I did that with my daughter, because it showed my support and excitement for her (even if I felt like i was dying inside).

I'm sorry you are so upset about kindergarten. It is really rough, and I found with my chld, other people didnt understand why I was as upset as I had been. Hang in there, and it will get better for you.

Sure parting with children is hard and you aren't alone with these feelings....
He's in good hands and will experience a lot of things, good and bad and will learn from it all....

After dropping him off...get busy....be good to yourself and do some fun things you will enjoy or use the time to catch up with the things you have put on hold...