I know this is wrong in SOOOOoo many ways, and I would clearly never do this to my children. Its pretty much just a joke so dont get your panties in a wad. :)
Have you ever thought that having a shock collar for your kids would come in handy? I have thought about it a few times.
The other day I was back in my bathroom getting ready to leave, I had finally got crabby pants baby to sleep and I could hear my kids in the other room fighting and squealing at the top of their lungs. I was half naked and thinking "Damn a shock collar with remote would really be handy right now!!"
Am I alone here??
I almost just spit my drink out of my nose!! Thats hilarious!
I honestly didnt know someone really did this!! Thats pretty sad. :(
My sister suggested a velcro suit and a velcro wall so I could just stick them up there to get a few minutes of peace and quiet!!!!
Sometimes I wish my daughter came with a mute button. And there are days I am ready to sell her to the gypsies.
I always wanted to learn that pressure point--the O. on the top of the shoulder--so that when my son was SO tired but fighting sleep SO completely, that I could just "POOF" take him down for a nap!
Dawn -- Yes! Do you know it? Can you teach me? Will it still work on an 8 year old????
I have dreamed up many, many uses for duct tape, too!
I often watch my 3 year old's mouth moving, while totally tuned out, and finally, after enough empathetic "uh huh's" from me, when the white noise wont' stop, I'll ever so gently, just, put my hand over his mouth and say, "please. please. go talk in the other room." Actually, as I type this, he and his 2 yo sister are jumping up and down saying "Mom mom mom mom mom"
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OMG MOLLY HOW COULD YOU!? I mean, we only use ball gags on the kids in our house ;) HAHA!!
Whoever says they haven't thought that is a damn liar ;)
I've been across the room and wished I had a bullwhip!
I didn't think of the shock collar one, but I have wished I could put a gps tracking device on my teenage daughter, (and my husband) To tell you the truth!
A muzzle :) I mean that in the nicest, sweetest way!! My 7 y/o NEVER, EVER stops talking (he even talks in his sleep)!!!! And sometimes I just need a moment of silence.
I was thinking more along the lines of a kids remote control
YOU HORRIBLE, HORRID LADY!! UGH I AM SO SHOCKED....
that I didn't think of that 1st!!! :)
Oh I've thought of all sorts of stuff..
"hm would it be bad for me to put the kids in their bed all day and just get drunk??" lmao
Course would never
but Hey it doesn't hurt to dream hahaha
Never for my own child, but I could think of some other peoples kids who could use a choke chain.
In public our kids are pretty well behaved. We have gotten many compliments on how they say Yes Ma'am, and Yes, Sir.
So when asked my husband is completely dead pan and in all serious says "We beat them." Then walks away.
Yes, I have wanted to get them microchipped and shock collared.
Molly, Molly Molly...you always have the most interesting posts!! LOL!! I think EVERY mama out there would entertain the idea but....not seriously. Enjoy the chaos, they grow up WAY too fast.
My son seems to talk non stop and he just turned 9 yesterday, so I totally get this! But the whole funny thing is HE just doesn't get it. He doesn't see how annoying he can be and if you ask him to just be quiet for awhile he gets all insulted. We picked up both kids from their dads yesterday after he had them all weekend and my son said "lets play the quiet game". So we try to play it and HE is the one that can't be quiet for even 10 seconds! Hysterical! But ya gotta love em....lol!!!
That is funny. I totally agree. Can I also get one for my husband?
when walking into any public establishment I tell all the kids "act like you have good sense".... the response is usually "what...?" and I say "exactly" rolling my eyes
HAHAHAAAA!!! You mothers are all so funny!
I, on the other hand, have never thought such things because, well, I must humbly admit, my children are all angels. You can even see their wings sometimes! =D
Just have to add to my answer--this is a hilarious thread!!!
I would have liked to have had a shock collar for my 9-year old nephew over the weekend. We had a birthday party for my husband and all of his family came. Our nephew was being so annoying. He went into our kitchen and just started going through all of our drawers. Hubby had to tell him repeatedly to stop and then he finally just had to tell him to leave the kitchen. He was also right there when I was getting ready to scoop ice cream to go with the cake and he kept touching the ice cream (putting his fingers and hands all over it) after I took the lid off of the container. I also wanted to get a few pics of my daughter with her cousins but he wouldn't cooperate and kept making horrible faces no matter how many times his mom told him to stop it. His 2-year old sister was better behaved than he was.
The man who did this was scheduled to be resentenced. Does anyone know how long he got?
Yes, I know it is a joke, but he REALLY did do it.
