Son Who Takes FOREVER to Eat His Meals

I have twin that are completely different. I have the same problem with one of my boys. He has a hard time doing anything in a timely manner. I had a parent-teacher conference with his teacher about a month ago, and she told me she let's him stand up by his desk when he's tired of sitting. He doesn't like to sit still, but he doesn't have ADD or ADHD. His brain is just constantly going, and he's extremely smart. So I thought I would try it out at home. I'll let him stand when he's doing something like eating, and it seems to work. I don't know what it is about standing, but I'm not complaining.

Have his tonsils and adenoids checked. My daughter was also a slow eater. Turned out that her tonsils and adenoids were so large they made swallowing difficult and sometimes painful. She chewed her food to nearly a liquid before swallowing. Meals took FOREVER!

Since having them out, she's done at the same time as the rest of us.

When I was growing up, one of my mother's friends had a 8 yo son who decided he needed to chew his food 100 times before swallowing it... Of course, he started this soon after his baby sister was born. Needless to say, it took him HOURS to finish his meals. (oh and the real kicker was that his parents were child psychologists! Ha!)

Obviously, for that little boy, it was a passive-aggressive response to the shift in attention that he had been used to getting and no longer got due to the new baby. Not sure if there is anything similar going on in your house or if there may have been any changes in routines, but it could be his way to get more attention from you... Remember, kids will act out for negative attention when they truly want positive attention.

Good luck with it.

My 5 YO is a slow eater as well. It drives my husband nuts and he usually yells at her and throws her food away. He also scarfs down his in 5 minutes.

My father eats very slowly and used to say that I scarf my own food down (but I think I eat in a reasonable time.) So everyone eats differently.

Does he eat slowly even when there is something he really wants to do? This is how I knew that my daughter is not intentionally eating so slowly. I took them to Mcdonald's and her siblings ate a hanburger, fries, an ice cream cone, and were ready to go play. She was still eating her burger and fries! And yes, she was hungry. I told her we could put it up but she wanted to eat it. She was eating as fast as she was comfortable with.

S., mom to 4 girls and expecting my first boy!

well #1, it's more healthy to eat slowly vs. fast, so i wouldn't push him to eat too fast. it can send mixed signals to your stomach as to how full you are and can lead to overeating. it can also cause indigestion. and #2, i would just tell him "when you're done with your food, you can do X" (something he really enjoys, like watching a favorite show)

http://www.childrensmiraclemusic.com

I think this is the CD to which you are referring. We got it after a reccomendation by another Mamasource mom and my girls love it.

Good luck.
A.

My three year old has been doing this since we started having her eat with us a couple of months ago. Until then we had just let her eat what she wanted (as long as it was healthy), when she wanted. Then she started using food to manipulated bedtimes and such, so we had to put her on our schedule. We started a sticker/timeout system. I set the timer for 30 min at each meal. If she is not done by the time the timer buzzes, whatever is left gets tossed, she gets nothing else until the next meal, and has to go to timeout. 30min is more than enough time for anyone to eat a healthy amount of food. It only took once for my daughter, now she gets her food eaten within the time each meal. They are smart, once they realize what 30mins feels like, they can figure it out their own timing.

Have you seen the Mrs. Pigglewiggle story called "The Slow Eater Tiny Bite Taker?" Maybe reading and talking about it would help him to decide to eat faster. I have no experience with this though, I just like the story!

I do not understand this. He actually sits there an hour? Do you make him sit there until he finishes or he actually wants to sit there and eat that long? What does he do at school when they have less than 30 min. to eat? Is he distracted when he is doing things or just that slow? I would think ADD if he has that much trouble finishing alot of tasks. I am a teacher, and the kids who sit and never finish anything are usually ADD. I would give him a time limit and when everyone else was through I would take his food up. He needs to learn to not wolf it down but to not dilly dally either.

Our 8 year old used to be the same way and was for several years. It was like she had a certain number of chews she had to chew her food before she could swallow! Normally we did nothing, just let her eat and we went on with our own routine. If she saw everyone else having fun or doing things without her she normally sped up. However there were times we had had to pull out a timer as she was taking to long(nearing an hour or more). We would give her a certain amount of time to finish and if she did not then we would take away dessert or snacks for the rest of the day (depending on which meal it is). We have not had to do that in quite sometime though...she has finally picked up a quicker eating habit on her own!

Good luck!

Make sure he is not overly talking. Make sure there is no TV on or other distractions. You could set up a timer for a reasonable amount of time. Keep acknowledging the amount of time he has left. If he hasn't finished by that time, he still has to get up. If it isn't bothering him, then I wouldn't worry about it too much. But, setting a timer would help him pace himself. He will eventually catch on when he's hungry that he needs to concentrate on finishing, but not scarfing it down, etc. My son does this for breakfast, it is usually because he is too sleepy or hasn't had a bm yet. I started putting his breakfast up and gave it to him for his after school snack. He didn't like that too much and started eating more for breakfast. My concern for him is that was starting school hungry. But, it has helped though.

Our daughter did this. One time she sat there for almost 2hrs to finish breakfast! By then it was almost lunchtime. We tried yelling, punishment, bribery, and "sit there until you finish it!" People told us to get a timer, set it for 20min. and when it dinged, she was done. We thought that was crazy and she'd be starving. Well, as soon as school started, she only had as much time as they alotted her. The first three days, she came home starving and tired. The fourth day, she ate faster. So maybe the timer would work? He won't starve to death. :)

How does he do at school for lunch time? Does he finish his meals there? They do not get an hour to eat.

I do have friends that take forever to eat. They take tiny bites and tend to talk a lot during the meal. When we go out to eat and I need to leave, I just say oh, I need to leave in 5 minutes. Are you going to stay or get a to go box? Most times, they say "I am not really that hungry."

Maybe he is not that hungry. I would give him smaller portions. If he wants more, he can serve himself more.

Also if you do not have time to sit with him the whole time. When you finish your meal, tell him you have some work you need to get done, do your chores and just check back on him each 15 min.

Maybe he likes your company. Does he like playing with the kids in the neighborhood? Maybe you can point out he could have 2 hours to play if he ate a little faster (or however long).

Some friends of ours have kids that get up all the time from the table. If she would just sit with them and eat dinner and talk about dinner and make yummy noises, I think the kids would actually sit and eat. They are underweight too. Try sitting with him for dinner and reminding him to take a bite while he is talking or what ever else he is doing. I am not sure on why he isnt eating????

There are speech therapists that do food therapy. There may be more going on there than a behavior. It could be a texture thing, a swallowing thing, or even a tongue issue. He may not be moving his tongue around in his mouth the way that he is supposed to be. It is worth looking into. Speech therapists do mouth work where they massage the inside of the cheek with a vibrating tool. They also have tongue exercises and other activities to strengthen the muscles in the mouth. Good luck.

Maybe you could give him smaller portions and let him ask for more. Or encourage him to graze between the smaller portions at mealtime.

Why is it a problem that he is taking so long? Does he complain about missing his playtime? At 6yo, he is old enough to manage his own time in that regard. Also, it's better for his digestion not to rush through meals. Just set the table and let everyone finish in his own time. Either he'll choose to speed it up, or he'll learn to really enjoy his time alone at the table.