Son Waking up EVERY NIGHT to Pee!

Updated on October 23, 2012
A.C. asks from Atlanta, GA
16 answers

My son (three and a half) has been night-time potty-trained for about six months (he basically did it himself - he just stopped wetting regularly). He would hold it all night and then wake up despearately having to pee sometime between six-thirty and seven-thirty, which was fine with us! But, starting about two weeks ago, he began waking up at five every single morning having to pee. Don't get me wrong - I would rather this than accidents, but I struggle to fall back to sleep, so I'm averaging 5 and a half hours of sleep every night and it's starting to affect my work during the day.

So, several nights ago, we stopped giving him water around bedtime, thinking that then he might not have to pee if he didn't drink so much before bed. He didn't complain (he doesn't usually drink that much before bed, anyway), but then each night we did that, he woke up at THREE instead of at FIVE, each time complaining about how thirsty he was and requring an entire glass of water - more than he usually drinks before bed. I didn't like that. SO last night, we tried giving him only a tiny bit of water to quench the thirst, and he woke up at five thirty, as usual, needing to pee.

I'm at a loss. Is this just a phase kids go through as they are night-time training, or is there another technique I can try?

ETA: I just wanted to let you know that though we have been working on pulling pants up and down, he hasn't mastered it to the point where he can do it on his own yet, so I have to get up with him. In speaking to his summer camp instructor, we learned that this was not at all unusual for his age. ^_^

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So What Happened?

Thanks to everyone for your help. I have struggled with insomnia for several years, and so I know this is my problem, but it's one we haven't been able to solve just yet. None of the natural stuff touches it, and believe me, I've tried it all, from melatonin to Valerian root and even meditation, but thanks for the recommendations. It is not just a problem when woken, but also when trying to sleep at night - basically, I struggle to fall asleep any time I need it. The worst is when I have newborns and wake to feed them and then can't get back to sleep! It appears to be a genetic problem, as my mother and brother also suffer from insomnia.

We live in an old and drafty house, and it gets cold at night, so sleeping naked is really not viable now that summer has passed. So I guess we'll continue to work with him on pulling his pants up and down, and I'll keep getting up way too early. I'll hope it's a phase, but if it's not, eventually, he'll be able to go potty on his own.

Thanks again.

ETA: I want to add, because I didn't convey it, that my husband gets up with the kids at least 50% of the time, but he doesn't wake when they cry, and when our son comes into our room, he comes to my side of the bed always, no matter how many times I tell him to wake Daddy (even though I'm furthest from the door). So I end up waking even when Hubby takes him to the potty. I didn't want him to get blamed when he absolutely pulls his fair share - it's just that him getting up hasn't solved the problem.

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

Both of my kids woke up around 5 every morning from 20 months to their 3rd bday to pee. I also get up a good 4 nights a week needing to pee. I rarely fall back asleep, and many days my day starts at 3 or 4. I struggle without sleep, but such is my life.

I think some folks are lucky with young kids sleeping through the night. I've found that kids under 4 wake up sometimes, and yes, when they potty trained, both of my kids got up in the middle of the night.

2 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

I don't normally have to get up in the night to pee either, but this summer I had two bladder infections, and I had to get up two or three times a night to pee. That was the first symptom.

2 moms found this helpful

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J.S.

answers from Hartford on

I have to get up nearly every night to pee and so do my children, most nights. The problem isn't really that your son is getting up to pee every night, it's that you're having trouble falling back to sleep. THAT is the issue you need to figure out. :-)

6 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

For many people getting up once a night to pee is normal. We never withhold liquids. My kids are like my husband and they crave water in the evening and at night. In fact both of my kids take a thermos of water to bed. My older child often gets up once and night and my younger child usually sleeps through the night without accident. My son took a while to go to the restroom at night by himself. It wasn't that he couldn't...he just didn't want to be in there at night, even with the light switch extenders. flash lights and night lights. If your kiddo is willing to go by himself, he can go to bed in just undies or pjs without underwear. I would think he could navigate that at 3.5. But my guess is that even if he can, he won't. If you are with him in the bathroom every visit, that's the routine and he won't want to deviate from that especially in a sleepy state.

Your son needing help in the restroom isn't at issue. The real issue is you can't fall back asleep. As someone who often has the same problem, I have no advice to help, other than get to bed earlier to make up for what you are missing. (Much easier said than done, I know). I'd also see if hubby can help too. I know my husband took on PeePee duty on FRiday and SAturday. It gave me a break to catch up on rest (during the week he needed the sleep for his job).

5 moms found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

Phase. His body is growing, and all the parts don't necessarily grow at the same speed. His bladder is probably about to grow... lol.

Hang in there, and be grateful he is getting up and going to the bathroom, rather than you having to wash peed in clothes/bedding. It will stop.

Do you have to get up WITH him when he goes during the night? Or do you just hear him and it wakes you up and you go check or something? You might consider (if you don't already) putting a night light near the bathroom to help smooth the process for him...

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I would consider not having him have pants on at night - if he has enough blankets, he should be warm enough. Would that be enough to allow him to use the restroom without your assistance? You say "we" so can Daddy help? What about giving him water an hour or two before bed, having him sit on the potty at bedtime and no water after that? Maybe his body does need more water, but you can give it to him earlier in the day.

5 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

He has a very small bladder, and it is good that he is passing the fluids so efficiently...you need him to pass this stuff out of his system..

Just tell him he is allowed to go by himself. Give him a flashlight, or put in a light switch extender so he can turn on the lights himself...
Hardware stores sell them... We used them with our daughter..

Good job that he is so well potty trained!

Can't he sleep commando. If he cannot get his pants and underpants back on at night.. No big deal...

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B.G.

answers from Springfield on

I'm obviously no doctor, but I have to get up every night to pee so I would not find it strange if one of my kids did.

Is there a reason he needs your help in order to use the restroom at night? Can you have a night light on so that he can find his way without waking you?

I would explore ways for him to use the restroom unassisted rather than cutting off his water. I drink water throughout the night (probably part of the reason I also pee every night), and I would be pretty unhappy if I had to wait all night before getting a drink.

3 moms found this helpful
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R.K.

answers from Boston on

Is it a little cooler at night than it was before? If so, try a slightly warmer cover and that might buy you both another hour of sleep.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Seattle on

Why does his peeing at anytime during the night wake you up? Does he need your help still?

I think you should try Valerian Root a few weeks to get over being woken up by his night time potty habits.

I would not withhold fluids.

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C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Can you try going to bed earlier to plan for him waking up?

2 moms found this helpful

I.W.

answers from Portland on

I wake up almost every night to pee. It's annoying, but normal for me. It may just be what's normal for your son.

I'd work with him on being able to get his pants off & on by himself, but at 3 1/2, I'd still get up to make sure he didn't need help.

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S.K.

answers from Atlanta on

I think a trip to his pediatrician might be warranted just to rule out anything more than just a "phase" he might be going through.....mainly because of him being so thristy and then waking to have to pee even when not being given water before bedtime.

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

Of course, I haven't had to do this yet, but two things come to mind that seem automatic for me:

1. I can't imagine denying water to anyone, least of all small children, who can easily become dehydrated. Unless it keeps him from eating, I think that he should be allowed a drink every time his body wants it. His body is still learning that when it's thirsty, it can expect a drink, and I don't think that it should be trained to do without unnecessarily.

2. In my mind, what you're describing is all part of the change in sleeping habits/patterns that starts during pregnancy, sometimes not until after birth. Yes, we all need our sleep, but just three years in is still part of that no-sleep zone, same as getting up at night to feed.

When I'm up during the wee hours, I (sometimes) use that time to catch up on other stuff. There's one TV show that I have to watch when it's quiet. I watched it at 3:00 this morning before going back to sleep. Sometimes I get on up and take my bath, and then go on back to bed. I've gotten up and started on cooking, ironing.... I need to get my butt on the treadmill. I just use that time as if it's any time during the day to do stuff that I can't get done with a little one at my hip or breast. There's no such thing, anymore, as daytime and nighttime activities when it comes to stuff I can do at home. I just do whatever makes sense at the time while I'm awake.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.T.

answers from New York on

Have you talked to your pediatrician? It could be a bladder infection.

1 mom found this helpful
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Y.W.

answers from Athens on

Can he go to bed in just his underwear and a pj top instead of the bottoms since he can't pull his pantsdown yet? If so, you should encourage him to be a big boy and go by himself. If you watch him during the day to see if he can handle it good enough, then in the wee hours of the morning, you know he will do fine. He is old enough to go by himself even at night. You can also sit a glass of water on his nightstand if he needs water.

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