Son's Behaviour

take away the electronics.

Once he has nothing to do to where he can just sit there.. he will get bored and will get up and do some thing else.

Take an afternoon and go to a park.. what kid can resist a play ground? Take along a baseball and glove or soccor ball. Start a game of catch with him. If you start the activities instead of leaving it up to him, hopefully he will join in and after a while of this it will become habit for him... like sitting around did.

First - have his thyroid levels checked.
Make sure he's not hypothyroid - because that will make it difficult for him to have energy to do anything.
If it comes back normal (or if it doesn't come back normal, he'll be put on medication which will make him normal), then it's time to make moving a requirement and habit.
Cut back on the electronics.
Have him spend more time outside every day (except in extreme weather).
Get him a basketball and hoop for Christmas.
Sign him up for taekwondo 4-5 days a week.
Have him walk a neighbors dog - go with him.
When you go with him anywhere - park further away from the store so more walking to/from car happens.
When he's an adult living on his own he can be a couch potato if he wants to but as a child he must MOVE for his own health and well being.

Sounds like you have to tie any favorite activity (TV? Computer? Gameboy? X-Box?) to FIRST exercising in SOME way. Walking with you in a mall, or at the YMCA if there is an indoor track, etc. You can't expect him to do it on his own.

I don't know if he is overweight - you haven't said. But if he is, then you need to also make sure that there is no junk at home for him - only healthy foods.

If you cannot get him to change his mindset on this, he will have health problems later on in life. I hope that he likes his favorite things enough for him to get off the couch.

Good luck,
Dawn

I wonder. Do you or your husband play with him? Perhaps he needs more encouragement from siblings or parents. Get outside with him and get him started.

I had a thyroid condition for a while that I didn't know about. He's hitting puberty, so his body could be going crazy and he may actually be tired and uncomfortable. A physical might be a good idea just in case. Better to know he's healthy and a couch potato.

If it's a behavior thing, check out loveandlogic.com - there might be ideas in it to help him make better choices about healthy behavior.

Does he have friends you can get to come over and do things with him outside? Friends whose parents you know well enough to suggest that you all enroll the boys together in some activity? I would not try forcing him onto a sports team if he is really not into that, but have you ever looked into sports such as golf, archery, fencing or tennis, which are either individual or just require one other person? He might find them interesting and he might associate the word "sports" with just soccer or baseball and hate the idea. You could offer to let him choose something to enroll in, while emphasizing that he does not have to play any team sport (unless he somehow suddenly takes an interest).

It's hard to do iin winter, but can you take him away on a weekend and make it fun (with some movies and other stuff thrown in) but a lot of hiking? Maybe even some cross-country skiing since you're in NY? If you approach it as "we're having a mini-vacation" instead of "you have to get outside and move" it may sneak up on him that he actually likes the skiing and wants to keep doing it.

And yes, don't let him watch TV or play games etc. until he earns it with exercise. If you have issues with the winter weather, get an exercise bike or treadmill for indoors but be sure he actually uses it.

I was like that too. It turns out I have allergies/asthma. It went undiagnosed until I moved to California and started being exposed to enough pollen that the symptoms became pronounced enough to be unmistakeable.
Now that I actually get enough air in and don't break out in hives when I exercise I can enjoy it and actually go to the gym!

Ditto to everyone, especially B on the thyroid thing.

If he needs any electronics in his life (and really, kids don't NEED them at all), there's some gaming system called Kinetics or Kinetix or something, where kids "play" the game by physically moving around. The games sense their movements. If he has to play these things, that might be the system for him.

I found this website when looking for motivation for my husband/son in other areas.

http://www.freeprintablebehaviorcharts.com/

Maybe something on this site can help you get him movitated.. I think it has lot of great possibilities.

Rules
No electonics between X and Z time.
Must be outside unless X conditions are present
You will need to play with him at first.

My girlfriend had a sumer off and she had the rule between 9-5 no TV and they were not allowed in the house. The kids had to go out and ride thier bikes etc. iwth in a few days both her older kids (she was on maternity leave with the baby at the time) had met several friends. Once you get the ball rolling it iwll make it easeir.

Good luck.

He needs a schedule where physical stuff happens BEFORE any relaxing is allowed. It's hard to state specifics without knowing what's happening there now, but all I can think of are things like "Mow the lawn BEFORE dinner" "Clean your room and sweep out the garage BEFORE doing homework" "Go to the park for an hour BEFORE......" "We're all going to the gym at ____o'clock BEFORE we make dinner"...If the whole family is busy with stuff and active it will be harder for him to sit everything out but it's not always possible to exercise WITH him, I know. But just staying busy is pretty active, it doesn't have to be a sport or rough play or hard work all the time. Just don't let him be idle or sit around with screen time until he has done _____first. Chores are good for kids on many levels-sounds like he needs more. We live in a wintery pace and no matter how cold it gets-barring closed roads-I see kids out riding their bikes in ANY weather. Send him to the store for you on a bike...I don't know the specifics of your household of course, but get creative!