Son Acting up When We Go Shopping....

I never had a problem with my son when we went shopping, but one particular day when he was 3 years old, we were on the shampoo isle, and he wanted the Loreal for Kids shampoo. I told him no, and he threw the fit of all fits. This included laying in the floor, screaming, crying. I simply walked away. I walked over to the next isle, where I could still hear him, but was out of eyesite. It took about 2.2 seconds for him to realize Mom's not standing there, and he stopped. As soon as he stopped, I walked back around the corner and asked if he was finished. I never heard a peep after that!

take your son to a store once a day for no special reason at all. before you go in say if you act up, we will leave. as soon as he acts up remind him once that you said you would leave if he acted up. if he starts again put him in the car and leave take him home and (since you know what you are up too, you wont be leaving angry, because you are teaching him) as soon as you get him home place him in a time out. or just leaving could serve as his lesson. let me know how it goes. it worked with all 3 of my grown children.

hi H.. i have a 3 yr old (will be 4 in jan).actually, i have a 1 yr old also, both boys. and man are they a hand full. in response to ur question tho, my oldest one used to get so mad when i would tell him we had to go to walmart. he never wanted to go, he always wanted to stay home and watch t.v. anyhow, i have started taking me a notebook and pen to walmart with me. now, if malachi starts getting bored and acting out i give him the notebook so" he can help me mark off the groceries." i've even started letting him pick out his own cereal, snacks, oatmeal flavor, those kind of things. and no, i don't just let him have whatever he wants in the grocery store, if he chooses something too expensive, i tell him no. but usually he likes doing this it gives him something to do besides be bored the whole time we're in walmart...H. these things help

I have a 3 1/2 year old son who used to act out when we went grocery shopping. He was an angel at home. I think it was out of boredom. I now talk to him before we leave. I let him know that mommy needs lots of help today and give him a list of things he can help me find, such as bananas, blueberries, bagels. You can make all the things start with the same letter and even write it out big for him. Give him a choice between two cereals and definately reward good behavior and give lots of reinforcing words, such as "you are being SUCH a good helper". If he acts up then he loses a privalige such as computer time or TV time for the rest of the day. Be sure he knows the consequences of his actions BEFORE you leave home. Stick to your guns and i would not recommend popping him in the mouth under any circumstance. H. this helps please let me know and have a great day, M.

My son is also very well-behaved normally and sometimes when we go out shopping, he starts acting like a lunatic. I have figured out that he does this because he's bored. I know from experience that removing them from the store, leaving the full buggy sitting there and just going home, actually works. It really does. But I also don't want my son to dread going to do errands with me, so I've started bringing along his gameboy. It's like magic, he just sits in the cart and plays and never makes a peep. If I forget the gameboy, he's trying to get out of the cart, running around, asking for everything that he doesn't need.....you get the idea. maybe your son isn't into gameboys, or maybe not even old enough. But if you can find a similar distraction for him, something to keep him busy, it may just work the same for you. Good luck!!

Hi H.-

I remember one time on Dr. Phil when he asked his wife to explain what happened one time when she went through this with one of their boys. Robin said basically that she just took the child and left the store. I mean- just left the full shopping cart and everything. Then go home for a good and long time out. This is a tough thing to do for a tired and frustrated mom, I know. But, the short term pain is worth it if it means these struggles come to an end sooner rather than later. When my daughter started this in her late 2's-early 3's, I did exactly what Robin suggested and boy, it only took 2 times and she got the message. Just think of this situation as the equivalent of a laying in the floor, kicking, screaming tantrum and then treat it the same way- ignore and remove the child from the situation. The same thing would go for a kid who acts out in a restaurant, etc.

And then, as stated earlier, get the kids involved as much as possible. Play I Spy, mark off the list, Mommy's helper putting things in the basket, etc.

Good luck. H. this works for you.
J.

it's hard to reason with children. But you have to tell him, there's no reasoning on this, you have a job, you have to do it, and he's not allowing you to your job. You tell him, that's is acting out is very ugly and not acceptable. I don't know how you fill about spanking and hitting, but if with the name calling, he needs a gently pop in the mouth, to let him know it's wrong. If you know you about how long it will take you to get the things you need, try a timer, give him a timer, tell him, hey son, I know you hate the store, and tell him most grown ups hate it too, but it has to be done, say, to him, let's set the timer for 40 minutes, tell him within that 40 minutes you should get your shopping done, that means checkout time too. But it only works if he's behaving, and when the timer goes off, shopping is over and leave. I don't know, as moms we have to be creative, ....

To correspond with what Crystal said...Maybe you could try getting him involved in the shopping. Let him pick up items that he can reach, give him the list (see Crystal)...etc. Make the store a game and get him invovled. As far as the temper tantrums, I have read that the less you react the better you are in the long run. Sometimes it is hard, but when they realize that tantrums don't work, they usually stop. Maybe this helps. Shopping is always one of the big hurdles.

I totally understand, my son does the same things! Is it just me or is age 3 much worse than 2. I'm at the end of my rope. I totally feel your pain. Maybe we should get together and let them duel it out.
Kindly, K.

Honey I have a two year old that does the same thing. I hate going anywhere with him.. Wal-Mart is like an act of torture. He hollers and screams with me only. Dad can go and he is fine. I wish that some stores would have a daycare for children like mine and yours..LOL I wish you all the luck in the world, or better yet all the moms out there that have the same problem....