So Discouraged Right Now

Is she going to be entering first grade in the fall? The reason I ask is because the Boy's and Girl's Clubs offer day care of sorts throughout the summer. You buy the card, it was $15 or $20 for the summer or year, drop them off for a full day of activities for free. My grandkids get lunch there and snacks, all the kids do. They have crafts, sports, computers, everything. Kids can go one day a week or all week, it's not a problem.

Don't lose heart.

Depending on family for child care is tough. Sometimes it works out great but it often doesn't (as you are learning now.)
I would start asking around. Could you find a high school or college student? They don't (usually) charge as much as an adult.
Or what about a SAHM looking for extra money? Maybe you could work out a deal where you don't pay a lot of cash but you could offer to babysit for her on the weekends or whatever.
When looking for part time care you often need to get creative. Good luck!

Boys and Girls Clubs of America
http://www.bgca.org/whoweare/Pages/FindaClub.aspx

Sign her up for the full summer program
Find out about after school programs

Become independent of your family for child care. This is, ultimately, your responsibility.

You know, by your mom backing out at least your daughter won't be exposed to a delinquent male cousin. That would be a terrible environment for your daughter to be exposed to. Many daycare places (like YMCA or maybe church programs) have a sliding scale available for students. Check into that. Also evaluate how much you make and whether your household is dependent on your benefits. Perhaps you could quit your job, stay home and generate some extra income by babysitting or keeping another child in your home this summer. Good luck!

Well, it really sounds as though you should have been looking for more reliable childcare before now. Regardless of the reason, your grandma is not a reliable sitter. She is doing you a favor. However, if she has left you stranded so that you have had to call into work 5 times, then it's really not as much a favor if it causes you to lose your job.

Yeah, she is showing favoritism and I understand that it hurts your feelings, but really not much you can do about that. Look into other programs...there are lots out there. Yes, it is sometimes expensive. You might have to cut back in other areas to be able to afford it.

Do you know any other moms that have similar work schedules...is there a way you can work out some sort of day care/babysitting swap with another mom near you? Or do you have a neighbor or something that stays at home that maybe you could consider paying her to watch your child a few days a week? The hours and prices might be more flexible for sure. I would ask around, you never know. You could also consider hiring a HS or college student for a few hours a week too.

Do you have a neighbor who could watch her until you find a place? Or could you take her to work with you along with plenty of books and quiet distraction?

The YMCA has summer programs. They tend to fill up quickly, but maybe they have spots. You could possibly sign up for a needs-based scholarship.

I don't know anything about your cousin, but I suspect that your grandma is tired of not getting to be a free-bird adult. At least she is giving you notice for the summer. It IS pretty rotten of her to have been dumping you the night before when she knows that you have to work...

It's a real JOB to find decent childcare. So take the bull by the horns and do that job. Work hard so that you find something. Regular daycares that have after-school programs during the year usually have summer programs for older students, so don't rule out calling them.

Good luck.

Have you checked with the YMCA to see if they have full day summer camps that you can afford?

Do you have a Boys and Girls club nearby? Here in San Diego their childcare/summer day camp is pretty cheap. They take 5 yrs & up and they have activities and field trips on Fridays. The one my kids go to is $50 or $60 per week plus you get a year long membership for $30.00. If your child's school is close by they will pick them up after school and keep them at the club until 6pm for $15.00 per week, which is a GREAT deal. Good luck I know how hard it is to find and pay for child care.

ETA: I know you are looking for words of encouragement. I can tell you that I KNOW you can do this. You will find a way. Check with the YMCA, your county (ours is called REC-PAC) and others...

Please understand that I am NOT trying to be mean. Your daughter really does deserve to have stability instead of being taken care of by different people. I am sure you will be able to find someone - even a high school or college student - who will be able to help you out.

J.:

Sorry - but your daughter deserves better than being tossed between three or four family members.

Pick a day care and get her the stability she needs. Find a great summer program - our county has a GREAT program - you can do 0830 to 3PM or 11AM to 6PM - and if you don't make enough money - there is a "scholarship" fund they can use.

Drop in care is not fair to the business owner. They count on stability too to keep their business open. Talk to them about your situation and find out who can help you with it and your schedules.

Same with the day care - if you can't afford it - apply for State Aid and get the day care help you need. If you don't qualify - due to your husband's raise - get your finances under control and find a way to make day care happen. Start with the Dave Ramsey plan so that you can control your finances instead of them controlling you.

Good luck!

The only thing I can say is that it's good you know now that Grandma isn't going to be reliable. Can you find a good day camp for your daughter to attend while you work, or a daycare program that takes bigger kids? At least you would know that your care coverage would be more reliable. Other posters have tossed you some great ideas.

hi sweetie,
would it be that awful to modify your hours? if your husband recently got a raise, maybe it's okay for you to cut back a little and spend the extra time having wonderful adventures with your daughter!
but i know losing income is never easy.
family as daycare is a mixed blessing at best. it must be pretty eeky right now, but since your grandma hasn't been particularly reliable up to this point, and has a less-than-desirable grandkid hanging around, it's really better that you find good, reliable daycare and do it now.
i'd look in your neighborhood for a SAHM who could use a little extra income, or a good college student. few daycare facilities allow drop-in unless you pay through the nose for it.
daycare is and always will be a thorn in the side of working parents. i went through a slew of solutions during my working/little kid years, and none of 'em were perfect. just keep persevering! i'm sure there's something better than grandma waiting for you to find it.
khairete
S.

Is there anyone you can trade sitting with? That way it won't cost you anything but time when they need someone to watch their kids.

The park district here has scholarships for some of their programs. Could you see if your park district has the same and see if you could apply? It may not cover the whole cost but it would offset the price some. I'm sorry your Grandma is unwilling to watch her.

Check in with high schools and local churches to find a teen that is looking for a summer babysitting job! Good luck, I know it's so hard to have to work and find some one great to watch your kids. A nice teen would have lots of energy and prob be more fun for your daughter than great grandma!!

Pay her. She can spend the money on your male cousin. I am serious.