Sleepless Nights - Mankato,MN

Updated on March 04, 2009
V.H. asks from Mankato, MN
11 answers

I am a first time mom to a WONERFUL 7 month baby boy. He is such a joy and could not image my life without him. But I am in need of a good night sleep. He still gets up twice a night and if its a good night only once. When he wakes I can tell he is tired but very restless. The only way my husband and i can get him back to sleep is to give him a bottle. I realise we have probaly started a very bad habit but since my husband and I are so tired, we give in. I am looking for some good advise to help get my little one sleep through the night.

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So What Happened?

I would like to thank everyone for their advice and sharing their experiences. It was intersting to see the mixed responses. After reading everyone responses I realized I should have mentioned my son does eat cereal and jar food prior to going to bed so I did not believe he could still be hungry. Knowing that he eat plenty of food through out the course of the day,I decided to let my son cry it out. I am sure that will upset some of you but I thought I would let it go for 5-10 minutes and see how things went. And within 15 minutes he was soundly back to sleep. When he woke in the morning he was in the best mood he has ever been in. Once agian, thank you to everyone.

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M.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

My child got up once or twice a night until 9 months,... I thought I was in a crazy house because it seemed as though everyone else baby was sleeping. The reason why it changed at 9 months was that he was eating solid food steadily. Then at around that age we sleep trained him if he started to wake up. Everyones thoughts as to when or how early to sleep train very. I like the sleep baby suffle. I know it is diffcult to find a happy meduim where everyone sleep better. Good luck!

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C.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

V.,

He's waking because he's hungry and/or thirsty. I see no bad habits here. Many kids wake in the night for a drink or a feeding well into toddlerhood. My son (14 months), for the most part, sleeps for 10-12 hours/night, but sometimes he does wake up and needs a little drink. We give it to him and within minutes he is back to sleep. Also, I know GROWN ADULTS who still wake once in the night to go to the bathroom and get a drink of water.

Also, know that the medical definition of "sleeping through the night" is 6 consecutive hours, and they may not be the 6 hours you prefer!! Kids vary at the ages they can "sleep through the night", and if we didn't have this unreasonable expectation hanging over our heads, many parents would be a lot happier.

One secondary problem that occurs when kids wake up to eat or drink is then they are up for hours at a time. It doesn't sound like this is happening, with you, though, and that's a whole other ball of wax.

There are some things you can do to attempt to make your son sleep for longer stretches of time, but of course, there are no guarantees. No naps longer than 3 hours, and no naps 2 hours before bedtime. Is he eating solids yet? A little meal before bedtime might help. Keep his room cool--our tendency is to bundle up babies for bedtime, but often they get to hot. Run a fan in his room for a little white noise.

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C.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

hi my daughter would wake at this age too. some night she would sleep through the night other not so much. i would change diaper and feed her if she didnt want it then i knew something else was up but i dont think u are doing any harm. do what u think is best for you and your baby.
good luck
C.

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C.S.

answers from Milwaukee on

V.-

I think Cassandra is correct. 7 months is still a bit early to be expecting him to sleep 12 hours without waking for at least one bottle. If he's only getting up once or maybe twice that is GREAT! Our son is 14 months and still wakes up occasionally for a bottle once a night. The problem comes in because you probably have only had 4/5 hours before he wakes for that bottle-while he's going on 7/8 hours...

We found that by minimizing that time on the bottle as much as possible made it more doeable..tag team if you can-one person makes the bottle while the other soothes the baby..give him the bottle-keep the lights low, don't change him if you don't have too-he takes the bottle and then just pop him back in the crib-he should go back to sleep pretty easily and so should you.

Good luck!

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S.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

You must stop with the bottles in the middle of the night. He does not need them. I know it's hard but you have to let him learn to comfort himself. In my experience, it should only take a couple times of letting him cry himself back to sleep and he will be fine. You are really doing him a favor by letting him learn self-soothing skills.

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L.R.

answers from Dubuque on

Hi there V.,

I too have a wee 7 month old baby boy and have long been awaiting for solid nights sleeping in a row. We have not fed him or given him water through the night for about two months now, but he will still wake mostly once a night in which we tuck him in and hes straight off back to sleep. It was a slow process to achieve this as we were doing two night feeds up till 4 months then cut it down to one, then started giving him water instead of milk, then started just giving him cuddles only, then tucking only and here we are hoping he will transition to full on sleeping. I know 4 of my close friends or relatives' babies who sleep 10 - 12 hours through the night from about 5 weeks - but this is not all that common and of course depends on the baby and their capability on filling up through the day. It is said that they are not physiologically capable to go that long with out food at that young age but obviously some are. I think by 7 months it is not too harsh to expect your baby to transition off the night feeds to at least a bit of water and eventually continuous sleep. At the end of the day your own feelings on the situation will play a huge part on how much sleep you get as you mostly determine your babies hunger and sleep patterns. I too would suggest solids through out the day if you are not doing so already

Hope this helps a little

L.

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M.W.

answers from Madison on

Hi V., I am sure you have gotten a lot of responses all ready. I would try giving the baby some cereal before going to bed and also plenty to drink. Cereal will make a baby thirsty just like adults. There is nothing wrong with giving the baby a bottle in the middle of the night. I have raised nine very healthy children and most of them were sleeping through the night way before they were six months old. Try keeping the baby awake longer in the evening, so that he sleeps longer through the night.

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N.V.

answers from Green Bay on

V., I am a nurse practitioner and mother of 2, ages 2 and 6. I can't tell you enough that you should pick up the book by Dr. Marc Weisbluth - Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. He is a pediatrician from Chicago that specializes in child sleep habits. It is the bible of child sleep and a great references as they get older. I love it!!

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K.R.

answers from Des Moines on

i agree with the parents who say you need to lose the bottles in the middle of the night. When i took away night bottles with my sons i put them back to bed by rocking them or giving them pacifiers. even if i was up many times i never gave them a bottle before 6 am then soon they didn't need that one either. One of my boys still wakes up and they just turned a year but he doesn't wake up for food. i would find routine that you are comfortable with for sleep training and start training! everyone seems to have a lot of luck with different variations of them. I don't think that there is any reason that a 7 month old cant sleep all night. One of my twins sleeps 12 hours every night and never wakes up. my other son we are checking into medical problems with his tummy but otherwise i would demand he sleep all night too!

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E.I.

answers from Duluth on

repeat this to yourself
it
is
not
a
bad
habit
fulfilling the needs of your son is NEVER EVER a bad habit. there is NO SUCH THING as a bad habit when you follow your baby's cues and your instincts. dont let ANYONE tell you otherwise, and believe me, they will. the point is NOT to follow someone else's ideas of how a baby should behave, but to follow your son's needs and cries. there is NOTHING WRONG WITH GIVING HIM A BOTTLE AT NIGHT. instead of trying other things, do that first, and get it over with and go back to sleep. the most content babies, the ones with the best sleep habits are the ones who have their needs fulfilled no matter what those needs are!!

first of all babies have tiny tummies! theres no way they can go all night without being hungry. teaching him to ignore those hunger pains with result in a scewed idea about food and hunger and listening to his body's cues. just go with it. it wont take very long and he wont get so hungry anymore... trust me, you wont trade one sleepless night for ANYTHING when you see your son so confident in you fulfilling his needs. the same thing with crying, you dont teach self soothing, you nurture it. you dont teach anything by force. put it this way, you dont teach a child how to walk by putting him up on his feet and making him walk on his own - why would you put a child in bed and make him go to sleep on his own! its scary to a baby! only you know when it is ok for your son, but babies are NOT developmentally ready for any amount of crying alone until they are around a year old. my son was 11 months old. you just KNOW. the cry changes. the more you listen to it and respond to it, the easier it will be to know when it changes.

second, sleep will not ever be the same. even when they grow up and leave the house, you will lie awake wondering what they are doing, where they are, if they are ok... once you have kids, face it, there is sleep, but its never going to be as good as kid free sleep. not ever. this is not said to scare you as much as inform you that you will have to alter your sleep needs some other way such as going to bed earlier, taking a 20 minute nap, getting up later and cutting out time consuming portions of your morning. also remember that sleeping to much will result in the same feeling as sleeping too little. if i get more than 8 hrs of sleep, im a wreck. if i get less, im a wreck. if i get almost exactly 8 hrs, i feel great. find out what works for you and find out how to get it.

my situation with my son was a bit different, we nursed, and we did a lot of night nursing. it worked so well because i just latched him on and we both went back to sleep. you can do this with a bottle, it helps if he is already in your room, then you dont have to go very far, you can just give him the bottle, then go back to sleep. the less you have to do to get him the bottle, the better. the less lights you have on, the better.

anyway, trust me mom, you will feel MUCH more confident in your parenting skills if you ignore doctors, friends, parents, inlaws advice and trust YOUR instincts. trust you son's ability to express his needs through crying. NEVER ignore that. the ONLY EXPERTS on your son are you and your husband. instinct and loving parenting trumps any advice in the world.

R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

I don't think your starting a bad habit. If you tried the paci and that didnt' work and the bottle does then that's what he needs. I have 5 kids and all of them woke at night for a bottle until they started table foods. Not just baby food and cereal, actual table food... so about a year old. I understand how you are feeling!! My yougest is 6mo and I still haven't had a full night sleep in over two years... couldn't sleep being so big pregnant, had my son, he finally slept all night about the time I was big with my daughter and now she doesn't sleep all night yet.

Good luck and hopefully he sleeps for you soon, until then you haven't started a bad habit, he will sleep all night when he is no longer hungry at night. I would try to feed him cereal his last feeding before he goes to sleep and see if that helps a little.

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