My 2 yr old son started getting out of his crib just before he turned 2. Every night he would come to our bedroom and we'd take him back to his crib. Although he mastered getting out of the crib, he couldn't get back in by himself. We decided it was time for a toddler bed. He's been in his toddler bed for a month now and he still wakes up every night - multiple times. Each time, he comes to our bedroom and one of us takes him back to his bed - but he starts crying unless we stay there until he falls asleep. At 2 or 3 in the morning - We don't want him screaming and waking up his 4 yr old sister - so we lay down by his bed- on the floor. Sometimes we sleep on the floor all night - sometimes he falls asleep and we head back to our room for an hour or two until he wakes up again.
We are exhausted and can't continue at this pace. Can anyone help with how to keep our little boy in bed all night?
We tried the "cry it out" method but our son didn't cry. He'd just sit and play or continue to come to our room - no matter how many times we put him back in bed. We even tried to take his blanket and favorite stuffed animal away if he didn't stay in bed. It upset him for 30 seconds (literally). After that, he'd find something else to draw his attention to.
So - we opted for setting up a "bed" on our floor. Every night, he falls asleep in his own bed and some time between 3:30 - 5:30, he wakes up and comes to our room. Now he doesn't even disturb us - he just goes back to sleep in his "bed" on our floor. We used our daughter's little flip-out sofa. It's comfortable to him and it's close to mom and dad. We are confident that he'll grow out of this and start sleeping through the nights.
Thanks for the suggestions!
B., when my daughter was almost 2 she would also climb out of her crib and end up in bed with me, so we decided that it was time for her own bed. She loved it and we had no more problems. good luck
I am so glad to see that others have given advise other than letting him cry it out! You can work this out without leaving him all alone to cry. He depends on you for safety and comfort during the night, just like daytime. Imagine how he would feel if you suddenly didn't comfort him like you do? I think it is better to parent with love and understanding. Even at 2am. Mainstream parenting might promote the cry-in-out method, but that doesn't make it right.
Anyway, there are ways to get some sleep. You could just let him come in and sleep with you when he wakes up. This way you don't have to get up. If you don't want him in bed with you, then you could try setting up a little "pad" for him on your bedroom floor. We made this work for us and we have hardwood floors.
Reward charts are good too, but I wonder if he is too young. You could try the pad on your floor until he gets old enough to understand a reward chart.
Remember, he is still a baby. He won't be waking up like this forever. Before you know it you will be awake at night worrying about your teenage son. If you give him love and comfort now, you will end up with a strong, happy teenage son that knows his parents love him. A strong bond now will lead to a strong bond later.
Of course, it is a good idea to make your interactions with him as boring as you can during the night. Still, I think he is after comforting more than entertainment at 2 in the morning.
Good luck. You can make it through this!
Have you tried to find out why he is waking up. Is he having Knight mares? Does he need to go potty? Is he thirsty? Does he just miss mommy and daddy. Has it become a "fun" game to get Mommy or Daddy to sleep with him? it may be better to deal with both of them for a week or two then him till he's ten. Try to let him cry it out.
I'm for crying it out. I personally think he's just testing the limits. My daughter does that every once in a while. We make sure she's ok first but after that she knows she's not getting out of bed. When Mommy and Daddy say it's time to sleep, it's time to sleep and she knows it. Stick to your guns! You can do it! Consistency is key!
What Lisha said. :) You can do this without crying, but it will take some work on your part to change his routine.
http://www.babywhisperer.com/smf/ and check out the archives on the toddler board, or post a topic yourself. The mods there are wonderful. This is something you can work through. :)
I completely understand the desire to comfort, I have three girls now, and the first two I handled very differently. The oldest I was a single mom and hated to hear her cry so I always gave in. The middle child I have been very consistent in not letting her push my buttons, and she has slept way better than the first one did. We had a couple of restless nights but with my husband's support this time, I have been able to stick it out, and she is much better off for it. The oldest was 5 before I could get her to sleep by herself because all I wanted to do was comfort her. The middle girl is almost 2 now and sleeps great by herself. We will see how it goes with this third. I highly reccomend that you get through a couple of nights letting him cry, and then it will get better and it won't be an issue anymore. If you give in right now he is just going to keep it up as long as you will let him.
B.,
I know you don't want your daughter woken up, but as long as you keep staying in his room with him, he will keep getting up. My advice - don't give him much attention at all during the night (hugs, kisses, talking, tucking in, staying with him, etc.). If you stop "rewarding" him, he won't have any reason to get out of bed.
Additional motivators you might try: a sticker on a chart for each night he stays in bed all night (with a trip to Chuck E. Cheese when the chart was filled up), or the threat that something (a favorite toy) will be taken away if he gets up again.
Best of luck - and don't worry, this too shall pass!
K.
I had a similar problem just recently with my daughter. Then I discovered that she's been waking up because she has to go potty. I'm not sure if you've started working on potty training or not, but some kids do it on their own without aid of a parent as well. This is just a thought, bc that's what happened with us. Now if Bella wakes up I take her to the bathroom, much of the time she's already gone in her diaper, change her and go back to bed. No more problems, except for having to interrupt sleep to take her to the potty, but she goes back in her crib and I go back to bed.
Good luck!
A.
I had a similar problem with my 2 yr old. My doctor recomended reading "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Richard Ferber, M.D.
i went through the same thing with my daughter who is 3 now...every single night!...oh it was horrible...we kept taking her back over and over...and then one night she simply grew out of it!...wonderful...she still comes in periodically but we tell her to go back to bed and she does...keep trying...you will make it through this...maybe if you have a special little sleep spot on the floor in your room for a while until he makes it through this stage...personally i would just keep trying what you guys are doing...keep the consistency going...you have to remember how young 2 really is and that he doesn't have a whole lot of control yet--especially when he is half asleep...good luck!
Have him checked by an ENT. It may be his tonsils/adenoids. He could be waking himself up so much because he can't breathe. Our daughter had this problem, and after having them removed....she doesn't wake up at all!!! Good luck
