Sleeping

Updated on March 28, 2006
T.B. asks from Chicago, IL
21 answers

Does anyone have any advice for how to get my 3 month old to sleep in his crib? Ever since our baby has been born, he's been sleeping on my chest for every nap and at night. When I put him in his crib, he startles himslef awake and can't get back to sleep. I've tried swaddling with a regular blanket and the SwaddleMe, nothing works. Any ideas?

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G.

answers from Chicago on

I went through the same thing. It took a long time to get my son to sleep in his crib and not on someone else. I just had to let him scream for awhile. Not for too long because it broke my heart. Then I would rock him to sleep. It took about a year for him to sleep through the night. He is now 3 1/2. I know that is not much advice but I wanted you to know that you are not alone.

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A.M.

answers from Chicago on

Wow, that sounds really intense... You must be going insane! Do you use a pacifier? My daughter had some similair problems, and my doc said to just let her use it for a few months (I took it off her at 7 months when she started eating more). She told me that my daughter just couldn't learn to soothe herself and that the pacifier would help...and it did.
Good Luck.

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M.C.

answers from Chicago on

babywise (the book)..my 15mth old sleeps from 7-7 with 2, 2 hour naps thanks to that book. i wouldnt follow it all the way but it does have some great ideas that work.

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A.

answers from Chicago on

Hi, T..

The DVD - The Happiest Baby on the Block (by Dr. Harvey Karp) really helped my husband and I....you can order it on Amazon.

He talks about swaddling but also combines it with many other techniques that make each more effective.

As far as traditional swaddling goes it didn't work perfectly for us either. We swaddled her and let her sleep in her car seat some as well as a moses basket because you could get the blanket nice and snug. When we transitioned her to her bed we actually put the moses basket directly in the bed for a long time before moving her out.

Good luck! Been there!

A.

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M.

answers from Chicago on

My five month had the same problem. He was pretty colicky and had acid reflux. He too could only sleep on my chest. I tried putting him in his crib at 10 weeks and failed miserably. I was able to transition him to my bed and co-slept. He finally slept in the crib at 15 weeks. What may help is proping one end of the crib up with a couple of books so it's the same sensation of sleeping semi-upright on your chest. I also put my son down on his tummy (I know it's not good and I got a lot of slack from my doctor) and it seem to help him sleep. Just make sure there isn't anything in the crib. Not even a crib bumper.

White noise helps too. We use a small space heater or running a fan works as well. There are also CDs with sounds of rain or waves on the beach.

Hope this helps!

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O.S.

answers from Chicago on

DO YOU PUT HIM ON HIS BACK TO SLEEP OR ON HIS BELLY. CAUSE IF YOU PUT HIM ON HIS BACK TRY PUTTING HIM ON HIS BELLY. CUASE THAT WHAT HE IS USE TO.

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M.B.

answers from Chicago on

Hi T.,
This is difficult, I went through the same and my son didn't want to sleep at all just in the babybjorn with me.
I can advice the book Healthy Sleephabits Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. Dr Weissbluth practice is the Northwesterns childrens practice. see www.sweetbabies.com
or order at amazon.

it may sound hard but i let my son cry with about 4 months. took me 2 horrible days with one night of 2 hours crying before he went too sleep but after that he's been a good sleeper.

My son is 2 years now and looking back at that time i now realize that i picked him up too soon whenever he cried or fussed.

for more information on how to do this and other options i advise to read the book.
good luck,
M.

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A.B.

answers from Chicago on

Well T.... that is going to be a tuffy. I just had to let my son cry back to sleep. I also played some sweet, low baby mozart or other classical music. You let him cry for 5 mins and boy will they seem so long, then go into and comfort and then leave again this time for a little longer. It may take a couple of nights but be patient this worked for me! Wish you the best!

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A.

answers from Chicago on

First pray to the lord for help. The baby is probably used to hearing your heartbeat. From now on put a lullaby near your body, maybe the baby will make the connection between the lullaby and the safety of his mother's presence. Babies who are very smart are not easily adjusted to change, of any kind. If your baby is very sensitive, it may take sometime, try relating to how you would feel if someone made you move to a totally new environment, for sleeping.

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K.C.

answers from Chicago on

I had a similar problem in that my son didn't seem to like sleeping flat on his back in his bassinet and he didn't like tight swaddling. We tried a couple of different things that worked. One was a pillow which raises the head slightly and has adjustable pads on the side to gently keep the child from rolling over (available on Amazon.com at http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00007B76C/qid%3D1.... Also, he liked to sleep curled up on his Boppy pillow (the Boppy company does NOT recommend this, but we never had any worries when he was sleeping on it). I would rock him to sleep cradled in my arms in his Boppy pillow then gently lay him and the pillow into his bassinet.

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M.

answers from Chicago on

Hi T.-
I had the exact same problem with my first son. I think he spent 23 of 24 hours a day on my chest. Boy was I tired. The good news is you can solve it the bad news is there will be lots of crying. I used Dr. Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". It worked well but took awhile. However by 6 months he was a marvelous sleeper. He took 3 naps a day in his crib of 1.5 hours or more and slept 11-12 hours a night- alone in his crib. It was a miracle and I felt so much better. Try it. It also worked well with my second son who wasn't quite such a tempermental sleeper...

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A.O.

answers from Chicago on

how badly do you want him to sleep in his crib? i also made the delightful 'mistake' of having my son sleep with me while i nursed him as an infant which was met with very little support from friends, family, strangers, etc. but what it boiled down to me was this, that darling baby of yours is only going to be a baby for so long. not sure how your partner feels about the situation but if it isnt causing any chaos on the relationship end and its nothing you want to stop then i say go with it. i slept with my son in the same bed up until he was a year and a half and his transition into a big boy bed was met with some resistance but not as much as books and magazines would tell you. he is a very independendent, outgoing toddler and personally i wouldnt trade that snuggle time in with him for the world.

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K.

answers from Chicago on

Hi T.;
He might not be ready to sleep in a crib. For advice on co-sleeping and transitioning out of the family bed, Dr. Sears books are great. We coslept with our daughter for 18 months and she made the transition first to a mattress next to us and then to her own bed very easily. It was the only way I could get any sleep that first year.

Good luck!

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K.K.

answers from Chicago on

Put something you have worn in the crib next to him. He is used to your scent. My daughter was the same way when I finally kicked her out of my bed. She was a bit older, but the same rule applied. It's what my mom and grandma told me to do and it worked like a charm. Eventually she didn't need my pajama's anymore ;).

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J.

answers from Chicago on

T.,
I found the book "The Baby Whisperer" very helpful. She stresses bedtime routine and has good strategies for helping your baby learn to fall asleep on his own. She does not talk about 'crying it out.' Which I just could not do. You can probably get it for a good price on half.com.
Good Luck!
J.

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N.O.

answers from Chicago on

Hi T.. Have you tried letting him sleep in the swaddle blanket in his crib IN HIS CAR SEAT? I know it sounds nuts but it worked for us. That's what I ended up doing until my daughter was about 6 months...I then weened her one by one...out of the car seat but in the swaddle then out of the swaddle. She slept like a rock instantly and I finally got some sleep too. She's now 15 months and has been a rock star sleeper all along..I was afraid she'd never sleep out of the blanket and car seat, but she's just fine...10-12 hours a night and one of two naps...good luck...

N.

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M.S.

answers from Chicago on

i had the same problem with both of my boys. i got a thermal blanket (they sell it at kids r us or tarket.(its like the material from long johns) its a good blanket to swadel with caus you can put them real tight. So after doing that for about two weeks and using a pacifier, and most important putting the babay to sleep tiered but awake...... they bot finaly started to sleep in there crib (actually my second slep in his car seat for about a month then went to his crib, its hard cause you just have to get them in to a routine, so you nurse or give the baby a bottle, have him fall asleep them put him in hte crib? cause if so when he wakes up inthe middle of the night he thinks he'll be waking up to where evere he fel asleep at (in your arm etc) and he gets scared when he wakes up in a place hes unfamiler with. Its just tring differentthings till you find one that works for your baby. but its also like i said routine do the same thing every night and he'll get use to knowing when it's time to go to bed. I would love to talk to talk with you and see what other things you've tried. I have two boys 21months and 5months give me a call sometime ###-###-####

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M.T.

answers from Chicago on

T.,
I hear you. I did some bad stuff like that too with my son. My son actually slept in a bassinet through 6 weeks and he had trouble transitioning to the crib too. Here are a couple of things that I did: I slept on his sheets, I put him on his side with a rolled up towel or receiving blanket behind him as well as sideways in the crib on one end (so the crib doesn't seem so big). If your baby falls asleep on your chest then I would try to put him/her in the crib. Keep trying and eventually he/she will figure it out.
I loved when my son would sleep on my chest too. But I knew I couldn't do it very often. Hope that helps.

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S.R.

answers from Chicago on

My son did too. He slept on my chest until he was 6 months, then he went in the crib no problem. Sorry I can't be of help. It is nice to know our family is not the only family co-sleeping.

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M.

answers from Chicago on

Hi T.!

As tough as this may sound, you just need to let him cry it out. I know its hard, but it will work, I PROMISE! My daughter is almost 7 months and she was a tummy sleeper from day one! Well, we she started to roll on her back, she would startle herself as well and would cry. For awhile, we kept going in and turning her over, but every time she would roll, this would happen again. Finally we said enough is enough. we let her cry, and she loves her crib now. Just an FYI... My sister-in-law had the same problem and now her son is 51/2 andhe still sleeps with mom and dad! No fun!!

Hope this helps!

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C.P.

answers from Chicago on

My advice is to read SOLVE YOUR CHILD'S SLEEP PROBLEMS by Richard Ferber. You are going to have to break the association. We had similar issues with our now 1 year old, and I spent way too many nights awake with him on top of me or rocking him to sleep in the rocking chair. Ferber's book really helped. BUT his solutions are really for babies that are 6 months old. According to my good friend, Dr. Catherine Pines, who is an expert in early child development, babies are not capable of falling asleep on their own until 6 months of age. I do know other mothers who used Ferber's methods around 4 months and had success. We didn't start until 6 months. It can't hurt to start trying now though. The Ferber method really works. It's like a miracle. Good luck!

C.

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