Sleep Battles with My Two-year-old

My son was very similar, I thought I was going to pull my hair out everyday. I got on all the websites I could talked to everyone I knew but couldn't find what would work for him. So what I ended up doing was rocking with him in my lap and singing to him (and lord knows I'm singer) but that seemed to calm him down and after about a week and by accident I made up a song for him and we sing it most nights not (by the way my son is 3). I would say it took about 3-4 weeks but now I can lay him down by himself and sing "His" song and leave..if I listen at the down most of the time I can hear him singing to himself and after a while he falls asleep to himself singing. Don't know if this helps but its what worked for us.

My daughter was like that. Your girl sounds just like mine. I co-slept too. She breastfed until she self-weaned at about 2.5 years old.
Don't worry, she will be fine. She will outgrow it.
My daughter did.

Let her have loveys in her bed, a flashlight, anything comforting. My girl, has tons of these to sleep with. It is her. She likes to make a "nest" (as she calls it) before she sleeps EVERY night.
My daughter is 7.... and will still occasionally nap during the day if she is tired. She needs it. If not, she gets so over-tired and fussy!

Keep to the routines you have, for nap and bedtime. Through protests. Roll with it. It will pass.
As I said, my daughter was like that. Until about 3 years old. She is now a GREAT sleeper and napper ( when she needs it. )

When my girl was that age, we put a comfy chair in her room. We'd sit in it while she wound-down and until she fell asleep. Then we'd leave.
Whatever works for you.... there is no right or wrong answer.

My daughter is very cerebrally active... and it takes time for her mind to wind-down. So I allow for winding-down BEFORE nap or bed. Then she will lull off to sleep.

all the best,
Susan

My son wasn't a good sleeper until he was weaned at about 15 months. He was waking up every few hours! I finally had, had enough. I've heard so many people say that their kids slept better once they were weaned and it didn't really matter what age that was. I was also getting pressure from many people to wean and had been bit a few times by my son really badly. I support breastfeeding! I didn't wean simply because of the pressure not to. I'm sure you know how some people can be about it. It's lame.
So, anyway my son doesn't cry about going to sleep. He'll be 2 next month. I give him a bottle and lay down next to him in his bed. I'll read a story a couple times and then turn out the light. He usually asks for a refill and then I give it to him, hand him the bottle, and tell him I have to go do something, give him a kiss and leave the room. Then, my husband or I will check on him to make sure the bottle isn't left in his mouth. Milk pooling up in the mouth can cause sores. I saw a horrible one on my neice when she was little.
It took a long time to get to this point. He'd cry for hours when I stopped nursing for the first couple days and I felt so bad. I'd just hold him and try to calm him down or have my husband deal with him. And I'm not saying I have the best pattern. I put my boy to sleep late. It just works out better for us. He wakes up around 7am or on weekend 8:30. Sometimes he'll cry for me in the middle of the night (usually). I then end up climbing into his bed at 2am but I don't lose much sleep. He's never cried it out!

I don't have any good advice, but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. I could have written your post about my 19 month old.

They only thing I have found that helps is to wait until he is REALLY sleepy, even sometimes letting him take some toys to bed and quietly play with them until he tells me he is ready for "milk and Nigh Nigh". We also read lots of books and sometimes I'll rock him for a bit before laying in bed just to slow things down a bit. I also give him Chamomila before bed (found in the Homeopathy section of Harvest House or Whole Foods). It seems to be calming for him, and adds to the routine of wind down time.

I haven't heard of many other Moms here who practice Attachment Parenting and are anti-cry it out, so its nice to see that there is another Mom out there trying to solve sleep issues in a healthy, compassionate and peaceful way. :) When she/he is ready, they will transition into falling asleep on their own...it will pay off in the long run that you have been so patient and willing to let them learn to do this on their own terms rather than forcing them into it. Good job Mama!

I don't think the "No Cry Sleep Solution" is going to work for you as it really is Crying it Out with a deceptive title! It suggests that you go in every 3, 5, 7, etc mins when baby is crying...but you don't pick baby up, you soothe back to a non crying/hysterical state.

I don't have any advice as I don't co-sleep, but just wanted to give you the heads up about the book.

My daughter was (and is) like that. I tried all kinds of things, but nothing worked. She is 4 and we still have bedtime issues, only difference is that she is older and doesn't protest as loudly as she used to. She will go to bed most nights now, but she's become the master of stalling. I think that with some kids, sleep just isn't something they want to do, they feel like they are going to miss something while they sleep, so you just have to keep doing what you are doing, and let her know how important it is to get good sleep. But really, if she's like my daughter, it's something that she will have to eventully grow out of.

Slow and steady. It has been your style till mow so don't lose hope at this point. Does she have a twin bed? Get one! We put my second son in one at 18 months and the sleep has never been better. We cuddle in the bed together -- not without struggles sometimes -- but we just keep singing or talking about sleep or holding him close to keep him from eigglingnor whatever. It is nice because he sleeps SO much longer in that big old bed than in my bed or a toddler. With my older we just went slowly from the cuddle to the chair next to the bed with lots of contact and singing and soothing and moved away from the bed slowly. It was months and months before we could walk away and say goodnight but it felt good cuz it was pleasant. I have fought for sleep and it feels so self-defeating. Alas everything reverted with birth of my second but we just went backwards a little bit and kept our eye on the prize. Don't be afraid to go backwards a bit when your kid needs it. I have learned that the benefits of supporting them far outweigh the little extra work to continue forward. Good luck hope this helps. You guys will get there!

There are so many methods out there on how to get your kids to sleep. Does she have special lovey/soother besides being nurssed? If not, maybe you 2 can go to the store & let her pick it out herself. We never had the problem of getting to sleep but once our son hit 2 & was climbing outa the crib, we had to re-train but that's different than what you need. My only advice: BE CONSISTENT!. Choose a method that everybody in the house agrees on & stick w/it. Don't waiver at all, even if she's sick. She's young enough that she'll figure it out & go w/the routine pretty quick. Good luck!