Six-Year-old Keeps Having Accidents

Updated on April 20, 2010
Z.B. asks from Ashburn, VA
7 answers

My six-year-old keeps wetting his pants. Basically, he holds it until it is too late, usually because he does not want to stop doing what he is doing. He claims, when he gets caught, that he doesn't feel he has to pee until it's too late. I will catch him doing 'the pee pee dance' and tell him to go to the bathroom and he will tell me he doesn't have to go, and then he wets his pants. I am 95% sure it's behavioral, because when he has incentive to stay dry (we have taken away cherished items such as Wii and TV) he can.....we are beyond frustrated but also fear there may be a medical problem. Does anyone else have any experience in this???? I know he is embarrassed (he does not want us to even talk to the doctor about it) but he continues to wet his pants, pretty much every day. He tries to hide it from us, but I do his laundry! Help.

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R.W.

answers from Dover on

I would check with the doctor first, just in case, but if it only happens when he's involved in play, it's probably not a medical/physical problem. My daughter had been 100% accident free for a couple of years when she (at around age 4) started to do this. Every time we had a play date, for example, she had an accident. After talking to a few people about this, I decided to try washing her up with cool (not cold) water, instead of warm. She didn't like this, so after only two or three times, she was back to her dry self! -- Actually, I had to remind her again of this a couple of years ago (about 7 y.o.), because she started to do it again when she went to a friend's house to play. It hasn't been a problem since.
Godspeed and blessings!

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S.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Embarrassed or not he needs to be checked. It could be nothing or it could be a UTI, small bladder issue, etc. Do not "take" things away. He probably is not doing it on purpose. Be honest with him that it concerns you and ask him to be honest when it happens. Do not ask him if he needs to go...tell him it is time to go! Check his liquid intake is he drinking excessively. Is it soaking his pants or small amount of urine? Take him to the doctor.

T.L.

answers from St. Louis on

If he can stay dry when you take away cherished items then he doesn't have a medical problem. Make him stop and go to the bathroom. I make mine go try at least every two hours no matter what he is doing. Most kids hate to stop playing and hate to wet their pants, but being the adult you just need to put your foot down and drag him into the bathroom it sounds like. Good luck I know it is not easy.

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S.C.

answers from Grand Rapids on

Haha, you must have posted just before I did! My dd is embarrased too and I am sure would not want to go to the doc. for this either! She started to hide it, but when she runs out of unders, she has to tell me. Now she's just says "mom, I peed my pants again". ugh!

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M.F.

answers from Sioux Falls on

It sounds like he is just having too much fun doing what he's doing and just doesn't want to take the time out to go to the bathroom. I would just make him try every few hours. Does he stay dry overnight? If he is having accidents at night too, it could be a physical problem. If he is having trouble at night too, have hi evaluated by a chiropractor. He can adjust the spine where the nerves are which control his bladder. If his back is subluxated there, it can impede his bladder control and is really simple to fix!

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M.P.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi! He may not feel it until it's too late if he's focused on something else. I would try to get him in a routine of peeing at regular intervals even if he feels he doesn't have to do so. You know every couple of hours or so, or times when he would usually have breaks. Then maybe he'll start being conscious of having to go at certain times.

If he's six, is he in school? My daughter never had accidents until lately because her kindergarten teacher was lecturing the entire class to not try to skip out of their work because they had to use the bathroom. My daughter, then, tried to hold it to long, so as to not upset her teacher and started having accidents. We told her -- if you have to go, you have to go. Just go, don't worry so much if it wasn't exactly the timing the teacher liked.

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T.B.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I would have him checked for juvenile diabetes, just in case. This was my friend's child's only symptom.

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