My FIL will be making his semi-annual pilgrimage to our house next week. I don't know why, but he always comes up when the kids are in school and DH and I are working. He understands that there is ZERO chance either of us could take off any time during this month. (yah, part of me thinks he purposely does this because he is rather a hermit) His life consists of working his 8-5 desk job and watching ESPN when not working. He has no hobbies, doesn't go anywhere but the grocery store or to see us 2x a year.
As he is alone all day, I'm trying to come up with things for the kids (DD 13 & DS 11) to do with him to engage him for the 1 to 1 1/2 hours after they get done with school and before I get home. I know if I don't have something layed out with specific instructions, my DD will sit on the computer the entire time and DS will park in front of the TV with grandpa. Not exactly qualitiy time.
It is too cold for Grandpa to go outside, and he's quite limited physically anyway. So I'm looking for stuff they could do each afternoon around the kitchen table. So far I've come up with decorating Xmas cookies and playing Uno. And then my ideas ran out. If I give a crafty type thing, all 3 would have to be involved or Grandpa will end up back on the couch. And no, Grandpa doesn't not have the physical ability to help cook anything in the kitchen.
Ideas anyone?
Thanks for all your suggestions! They'll be doing gingerbread house kits tonight. Tomorrow was going to be photo album day but we have a surprise 2nd showing on our house (yeah!) so I'm shipping the whole lot of them off to Grandma's house for cookie decorating. Thursday will be making pomanders, and Friday tree trimming for Saturday's early holiday celebration.
Also, thank you for the insight about his visitation habits. I think you are are right when you suggest he does this on purpose, as he's seeking a quiet get away with limited interaction time. I feel a lot better and more positive about his visit now that I have this frame of mind. Now... can anyone help me figure out how to keep the house clean for our showing tomorrrow or what to do with the new puppy DD and DS came home with Sunday ?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!?
Does he like puzzles? He might not but its hard to resist a 1000 piece puzzle coming together! They could make it a goal to put it together by the end of his visit.
I like a lot of the ideas you've gotten so far. Another fun and pretty simple game is Apples to Apples. It comes in different levels for different ages. We loved a game called Whoonu by Cranium. My mom loved to play with my kids because it's a wonderful way to learn more about people while also laughing and having fun. It would help them get to know their grandpa better and vice versa. I also don't see a problem with all of them watching TV or a movie together if it's something they enjoy. My dad has enjoyed watching the Home Alone movies and Tom and Jerry cartoons with my boys.
Go through old family photos and ask grandpa to help identify everyone in the photos and tell the story. The basic who, what , where, when and why in each picture. The kids can write it all down and then make a scrap book of their family history.
Buy one of the family tree software programs and have your children teach him how to use it. I am assuming that if he still has a desk job that he is familar with basic computer skills. Hopefully, as they complete his side of the tree they will also hear some memories and learn some of your family history.
Another idea, teach Grandpa how to Skype so that he can have video chats and "see" his grandchildren more often.
I love the suggestion of ancestry.com. That is something they could all get really involved in and very excited about.
And the Gingerbread house kit is great also. Maybe have both of those along with Uno and they can be entertained all week!
BTW, I'm sure he comes when you all are busy - since he's used to being alone, full days and nights in a house with a lot of activity may not appeal to him. Quiet days with socialization in the later afternoons and nights probably appeal to him more.
Enjoy the visit!
Tell them you have come up with the perfect christmas present for yourself, from them.... Get a old tape recorder and ask them to tape themselves having a conversation that includes a list of funny questions that you could come up with beforehand. You could use a video recorder if you want. In it, have the kids ask him about his life experiences, use really specific questions 'what was your first car? what happened to it? Who was your first crush? What did you want to be when you were a kid? If you could go back and do it over again, what would you change? things that they can really relate to. and some about your childhood as well 'name one time when mom got in trouble as a teenager' 'what sport was mom best/worst at'? 'Who is your favorite kid' 'Who is your favorite grandkid?' (haha). Then write questions for HIM to ask them. Or buy those 'table topics' games and select some funny/good ones and put them on the table, tell them they have to each choose 7 (or whatever) questions to ask each other. And pick 5 questions they want someone to ask them. Tell them the final product (tape, video) has to be a certain length to truly count as a christmas present to you, and they can do as many 're-takes' as needed to get a product that you could edit together. Maybe your daughter could be in charge of designing the 'set' and your son could be in charge of 'scene set-up' or something.
This could be a week-long project if they want to work on it every day!
hopefully they would have a good time creating something that could be the most treasured gift you've ever received!! And they will treasure it as well, someday.
wow this is a really good idea, if my kids were older I would make them do it with my parents!
Good ideas so far and I'd say that watching sports is good bonding time. I watched football with my dad growing up all the time and it's one of the best things I remember. Somehow sports are different than regular tv. It can lead to a lot of conversation and keeping up over the course of a season who's going to win the superbowl or world series etc. I jsut say this bc you say he watches ESPN. I keep WANTING us to sit and watch sports as a family. It never happens and I can't wait as an exciting game is fun!
A gingerbread house kit, from Trader Joe's or Michael's?
Does grandpa have a computer and does he know how to use it? The kids could help him set something up so that he'll be able to communicate with your family, and share pictures thoughout the year.
They could play some board games or do a puzzle.
Do you have any old photo albums of when you were growing up? You could dig them up and have grandpa go thru them with the kids, and encourgage them to share stories of the good old days.
Checkers, chess, cribbage, backgammon....any old game.
Going to the bookstore (my grandad and I loved the bookstore).
Watching TV with grandpa IS quality time. I sat on my grandad's lap and watched MASH, Nature, historical documentaries, Laurel and Hardy...stuff I never would have watched on my own.
It sounds to me like Grandpa comes to visit because he wants a vacation. So let him have his time, I say.
I love Christine S's suggestion particularly. You know, ancestry.com has a free two-week trial going on right now. You could sign up at the beginning of his visit and they could explore their heritage/family tree. I think your kids are the perfect age group for this and it sounds like your dad is computer savvy. My MIL signed up for ancestry.com about two months ago and she's been completely and utterly engrossed in it. Her findings have been really interesting, to say the least!
There are books on Amazon, questions to ask Grandpa and places to write down the answers
I've found a 10-in-1 game chest recently, and my son goes crazy with it. We keep all the pieces, and a deck of Uno and a deck for Crazy eights and a deck of Angry Birds cards in it. It's also very pretty, so it can stay out in the open on an endtable for easy use and easier cleanup.
http://www.amazon.com/10-in-1-Game-Chest/dp/B0001GT2RK/re...
How about leaving photos out and have him help them label and arrange them into an album? They can hear stories of when he was younger and learn more about the family.
Hope this helps.
Are there any games they could play? Card games are easy to sit down and play and it might be fun for him to teach them one of his favorites.
Cards, checkers/chess, Cribbage; I think it would be cool if he's up for it for Grandpa to teach kids games he played as a kid like marbles, jacks etc. How about coloring; seriously some crayons and a coloring book or just plain paper can create loads of fun. Pictionary might even be fun for the four of them. This should create some memories and bonding between kids and Grandpa.
try this-tell them they have to come up with one thing a day to do with gramps-I guess I don't understand why he comes n stays when no one is home..but it is what it is huh?
Checkers
Any table top games - my kids love these!
Word searches and other puzzles
Are your kids into anything like magic, jokes or puppet shows? Have them perform for Grandpa. It would give him a chance to relax yet be interactive with the kids
And be sure to allow at least a day or two for absolute vegging - it is only an hour or so, a little TV is ok - we bond over finding Nemo at our house all the time! =)
Have the kids read to him, Mad Libs, play video games together (Wii), put a photo album together, puzzles... That's all I've got right now. Good luck
