Should I Get Rid of the Pacifier?

My oldest was very hooked on her pacifier, too. Sometime between 18-24 months I cut the end of it off so it wouldn't work so well. She just pulled it out of her mouth, stared at it and put it back in . . . she didn't even care. So I just kept cutting it shorter until it wouldn't even stay in her mouth. Everytime she put it in her mouth it would just fall out. We talked about that it was "broken" and I had HER throw it away. The first couple of nights took awhile to fall asleep. I just reminded her that it was broken and found something else to comfort her. After that it was never brought up again! Good luck!

If she throws it I would NEVER go get it for her. To bad so sad that's the consequence of her tantrum.

It's like your daughter is playing fetch with you. She's the master in control and your the dog.

If she throws it, leave her in the crib and walk away. Let her cry it out.

We recently went thru this too. My son is now 2 years old. Around 18 months he stared letting me know that he didnt need it. However, he still used it at nap/bed and in the car. Not during the day. We slowly weaned him from each time he used it. First was naps, than it was bedtime, than the car. For us, the car was the hardest. If he was making peeps in the backseat we would just let him have it, its hard listening to them yell at you while your trying to drive.
We went cold turkey with each step, we said, "you are a big boy now, you dont need it". Once in a while we would say, "I cant find it" or "its not here". We would try to distract him. You will get the screaming and crying for it, but stand stronge and DONT give in. the one time you do give in, she'll know that if she acts a certain way, you will give it her.
In the car, we resorted to music...kid frriendly CD's that he could sing along to and wiggle in his car seat. AGain, giving in doesnt do any good. It may take a few weeks but it'll work.

Sounds like your daughter is like my son was attached to the security of the nuk, not the need to suck. What we did at about 15-16 months was have him pick out a stuffed animal or another lovey (either at the store or at home) and that became his special thing to sleep with - really talk it up, and make the new lovey a big deal. My son only used the nuk in the crib. It worked really well - never had one crying night, and still at almost 2 he loves his bird that he picked out. To prepare for this change we also cut the tip of nuk, shorter and shorter over a week or so, and happen to do all of this when he had a cold, so he was less likely to miss the "sucking" as he couldn't breathe out his nose very well. One night/nap time the nuk was just gone, and he never asked for it, as he had a new companion. Somehow the combination of everything worked, and it was painless! He knows that his bird is only for bedtime, and it stays in the crib.

Your daughter's situation is exactly like my son's a year ago. He is now 33 months old and has been without a pacifier since a couple of months after his second birthday.

I asked my dentist about pacifier use because I was worried that it might cause an overbite, and he said (after checking his mouth), that it was not causing overbite and that I should let him use his pacifier at night and in the car until he doesn't seem to need it as much. He said it is not worth the trauma and that some children start sucking their thumbs if their pacifiers are taken away when they are not ready.

As my son approached his second birthday, he was proud of becoming a big boy. We started talking about his not needing a pacifier any more. He basically gave it up himself, with some encouragement from me and my husband. I noticed that he would not suck on it all night, but would spit it out after he fell asleep. One night I asked him if he would like to try to sleep without it and he said OK, and that was it.

About searching for pacifiers, I had the same problem. I put three pacifiers in his crib. If he threw all of them out, I would only pick them up once or twice if I thought he was nearing the end of this tantrum. I refused to pick them up, after telling him that I would not pick them up if he threw them out again, and he quickly learned to stop doing that.

Good luck.

J.

Hi L.,
It seems like you don't have an issue with the pacifier, but rather the act of searching for it when she has a fit. I would suggest the next time she throws the pacifier, you just tell her that now she can't have it to sleep with for this nap. It may mean that you spend some time with her screaming about it, and you might have to do it a few times, but she will either stop throwing it, or will discover that she doesn't need it.
At that age, there is no physical reason why she would "need' a pacifier, it is probably more of a habit than a need.

I dont think that you HAVE to take it away. Both of my children had a pacifier until they were 2. My friend as well as my Doctor had children of the same age and they both let their children "THROW" away their pacifiers. This way when they asked for it, they just told them that, "remember honey you threw it in the garbage." That never worked with my kids but I thought that maybe since it worked with both of theirs its worth a try. I did both of mine cold turkey when I thought it was time. After about the 3rd night they went to sleep just fine. My kids, too, were addicted to it for sleep. Good luck...its always hard to see your children cry for something but sometimes, as parents, we just have to do it.

My son is 17 months and still uses a nuk. He hasn't had a bottle since he was 8 months, (this was by his choice.) We tried to take his nuk away when he turned a year but it was horrible. He would cry for three or four hours , I couldn't take it and gave it back. He only uses it at nap and bed time. He also will throw it if he gets mad, I always have an extra so I can give it to him and walk back out . In the morning I then find the nuk he threw. He has only thrown both nuks once and when i didn't get the second nuk he cried but did go to sleep with out. I wouldn't be to concerned if the only time she is using it is nap, bed and car. She will eventually give it up when she is ready. My dentist said as long as they don't have perminant teeth and they aren't using it all the time it won't do any damage. Good luck.

My daughter was attached to her pacifier until after she was 2. I tried so many times to take it away but it broke my heart so see her cry for it so much so I always gave in and gave it back. One day a friend of mine was over and he took it from her and said you dont need this you are a big girl! He threw it away and went around the house and found them all and threw them away right in front of her. I dont know how he did it but she never asked for it again!

I agree that if she's throwing it in as part of a tantrum, I would not retrieve it for her. She's old enough to know what she's doing. (Different from an infant for whom the paci might have fallen through the crib rails or he dropped it over the side in an "experiment.") As for getting rid of the paci, we decided with our first that age 2 was the "magic number" by which we wanted to be done with it. So we prepped our son well in advance, and around his 2nd birthday, we went to Toys R Us with his "nighty nuks" (which were all we were still using--the daytime ones had been gone a while), and used them to "pay" for a "no nukkie toy." (My husband filled the cashier in in advance.) Nothing extravagent--I think it was a car or something for $4. But my son was so proud and I think he could still pick it out of his collection!

Another idea that I've heard other moms use is to have their kids pack up the nuks to "send" (for pretend) them to new babies who don't have any yet.

Good luck!

I agree 100% with Marissa. Babies lose the need to suck on a pacifier between 6 and 9 months. It's too late for you now, but it is best to wean them off in that time period so all the control issues you are encountering don't come into play. It may be a struggle for you with a 19 month old. Good luck!