ok so I have a eci worker working with my son who he adores and I do like her. but here is the question.she is trying to prepare him for the 3 yr old preschool he will start in my. she wants me to limit his toys from 10 down to 2. that is not so much a problem. this is what i disagree with is the fact that she wants me to do what a preschool would do. you have 5 minutes till pick up. you have 3 minutes till pick up, its pick up time. now this in most cases would be fine but my son is hard of hearing. so will he be able to understand what i am telling him. I dont know the signs for this and she also doesnt use sign with him. she counts with him but she doesnt speak loudly very often with him. even when I raise my voice with him sometimes he doenst respond to it and sometimes he does. i got very good agreeing and disagreeing questions when i asked about his fit throwing and i learned from the disagreers. so dont tell me what i want to hear. your honest opinion keep her or change her and why. thanks guys
eci stands for early child hood intervention. i do sign what signs i know and i look up what i dont online. what she is doing with him is lining up his animals and telling him to line up. and push them down to understand push. then she pushes him down and reinforces push. she played ready set go with him one day. shes working with fine motor skills and like counting his animals and stuff. or count the cars. she is working with him on pick up his toys. the reason she is limiting his toys apperently the disability day care he would start in my will limit him to 2 toys at once. and you have to put those up to get others. which i understand this is how most preschools operate. but the ready in 5 minutes i understand is getting him ready for it but do i sign it and which signs do i use? i think sign and talk is the best option like one mom siad she may be teaching him to read lips which makes alot of sense. but will he actually understand those directions being hardof hearing? I see what she is preparing for him and why but not sure its going to work the pick up in 5 min. 3 min and time to pick up. he cant follow directions if he cant hear them. which is alot of why he qualified for eci not following directions. and yes we are working on his ear situation I always get asked this and hearing aids is a process you have to go through so no not yet but its not out of the picture totally.
wonderful suggestions and jennifer t that is what i needed someone to say to me. make me think diffrent. I think I am going to keep her a little longer and talk to her and see how it goes. the idea of the 5 and 2 was suggested to me in private email but told how to do the signs to. and the ones that suggested she might be teaching him to read lips i never considered that. so thanks for your feedback and making suggestions I wouldnt have thought of.
Is she trying to get him to read lips so that he can be mainstreamed? That is my only thought.
If she is trying to mainstream him I would say that is a good goal.... I would give her a chance and see if she is successful with him and then maybe she can give you tips if it is not working when you do it.
Good luck!
I had great luck with all of my ECI workers and they encouraged using sign language. So my first questions would be 1.) why wouldn't she teach you and him the signs for these tasks? 2.) has your son's hearing deficit been addressed by his doctors? 3.) what's the rationale behind limiting his toys? When they did this with my daughter, it was because they wanted her to learn some specific tasks from the select toys.
the bottom line is that if your son cannot hear you or her, then she needs to help you find an effective way for both of you to communicate with him and him to communicate with you. I would ask her these questions and if you don't get an answer that makes you comfortable or you feel you can't work with her, then absolutely ask for a different worker. Just remember, it's not personal. this is your child's life, education and future....dont let anyone intimidate you. If you don't get what you feel you and your child need...then you keep pushing until you get it :) good luck
Howcome you arent using signing? I would think that would be an important communication tool at this juncture.
You might want to see if he thrives differently with a different worker, or maybe you just need to communicate MORE with her so she can give you a glimpse of the future using her methods. It seems like you are questioning the methods and she didnt give you a tool, so at this point I would feel a bit neglected.
I think you are underestimating your son. I know that is not your question, but being his mom and knowing his limitations is sometimes a detriment to his further development. Sometimes we hinder our kids without even knowing it. He also knows you and may just be ignoring you. Yes, they figure that out early!
Trust the ECI lady. She really does know what she is doing. She is giving him the clean up warnings because that is what the pre-k will do. They do this in order to cut down on transition related tantrums. Who wants to stop playing?
As to whether you sign or talk, that is up to you.
Good Luck
This is basic information/language he will be using at the preschool program and it will eventually be part on the way you talk to him. You want to be on the same page as the school so he won't become confused. If you tell him time to pick up and then don't use the same language as the pre-school it only makes things harder for him.
The way she is teaching him is normal. He needs this to help him learn the value of time, how long 5 minutes is, how long 3minutes is, etc...kids learn the concept of time passing by this. It is an important part of the pre-school learning program. That's why they all use this concept to get the kids to clean up and do just about anything. It gives them a chance to mentally prepare for transitioning into another activity and do the required task.
I don't have an opinion that is strong one way or the other about signing. If you want to sign with him then sign up for some classes and learn the signs. You will be teaching him and then that will strengthen the signs for you too. If you call the school board they most likely have at least one teacher who works with deaf children as a translator in classes. That person will be able to get you headed in the right direction to finding classes and other resources to fill the needs you have. They may even work with you one on one. You can also buy videos and other items at book stores like Amazon or Hastings. They can be very good too.
As for him doing what she wants, if he is responding then he is paying attention to her whether she is speaking loudly or not. He may be learning to read lips and that way make out what is being said. If he is not paying attention to you then make sure he is looking at your lips when you are giving him directions.
Putting him in timeout for not listening is not a bad thing if it is for just not doing what you ask. If he is paying attention and choosing to not mind then he needs consequences. If you think he can't hear you then make up some pictures of the activities you want him to do and show him the pictures and point. When you learn the needed signs use the pictures and the signs together and he'll understand the sign better.
Okay, so what IS she doing with your son in her sessions with him????
And every Preschool is different, so how can she assume, that they will limit toys down to 2? What does she mean anyway by that?
Each Teacher, directs their kids/class/routines/schedule differently.
So if your son is hard of hearing... so what is she teaching your son?
And how does that then transition him and help him?
What 'skills' is he learning, from the ECI worker?
You did not mention what exactly... that ECI worker is doing with your son, to help him.
I think if he loves her it might be hard on him to lose her. But I get what you are saying too. Ok, I don't know about sign language but I was wondering, it this is the only thing that is a bit off with her, could you try and tap him on the shoulder and hold up five fingers and say at the same time five minute pick up, and then three minute with three fingers etc? Maybe I am over simplifying? That is really the only idea I have with that one, but the rest sounds good. I know my sister had some great teachers and I don't think my mom would have gotten rid of one she was bonded with. Good luck whatever you decide!!
Definitely talk to them. My son is has ECI therapy right now for speech because of his cleft palate. I was wondering if I should give up on ECI because I thought they weren't working on enough sounds with him. I didn't see the progress I had hoped to see. It wasn't until we had our meeting last week with the therapist and her supervisor (he also turns 3 in May so he'll be transferred to public school walk-in care, so the supervisor had to come visit too) that I thought to bring up all my concerns, and, lo and behold, they had some great answers for me! They had charts and graphs to show me what sounds are in the normal range for him (I was expecting way too much of him, because my older daughter was so advanced for her age) and I learned that some of the things he wasn't doing are not expected for another 2-4 years for kids in the normal range. It's amazing how much happier I am with their services after I thought to ask them my questions, rather than think about switching to another program. I had voiced concerns before, but I never asked about specific behaviors/sounds, and being that specific was most helpful.
If their answers aren't good enough, then you can consider switching. We did switch once, but only for scheduling reasons.
Here is another suggestion...... talk to his ECI case worker and ask if "pictures" will help... especially in a crowded/noisy pre-school, if the teacher holds up pictures with the next task (... putting toys away, for example) it might help him understand what is needed.
It may take a while for him to understand what each of the pictures stands for, but that may be a tool you will be able to use with him for a long time.
Also, can you get a large timer so he can see that the time limit is lessening? Not necessarily one with numbers, since he may not recognize the numbers yet. Maybe the old fashioned kind that has the dial you turn so he can see the difference in the amount of time left.
Why don't you just raise your concerns with the ECI worker? It sounds like she is doing some very specific things so she must have a good reason. My DD has used ECI services before for a different issue than your DS but I asked all the questions I could think of so that I understood all of what she was doing and why. Understanding the therapy so that you can continue on your own will only benefit your son that much more. And I agree with the others that you should learn American Sign Language. I'm sure there are classes at a junior college or even online that you could take. Being able to communicate with you in that way will only make him feel more confident.
Hi D., ok
1) What does ECI stand for?
2) What does she say is the reasoning behind limiting his toys?
3) Why aren't you signing with him every day? I would think everyone in his life would be fluent at asl...
4) If he responds well to her, and he is effectively preparing for preschool with her, why would you want to replace her?
5) The 5 minutes til clean up time is teaching him to smoothly transition from one activity to another, which he will be faced with in school. I know a song...2 more minutes....2 more minutes....2 more minutes and then we will clean up. I know the sign too for the song which I would think your son would enjoy learning.
Sorry more questions than answers!
:)
