Happy New Year to all.
Its been a long time since I've been on Mamapedia.
I have a general question about sharing.
My husband pays child support and has joint custody.
My husband is having a difficult time understanding why his exwife (of 6 years) refuses to allow their 9 year old daughter to use her Knott's Berry Farm (Theme Park) pass when she is with her father and his family members. He has offered to be responsible if lost, stolen or damaged as he believes any parent would. He feels it is senseless and an unnecessary expense to purchase a 2nd pass since the passes are under the individuals name and belongs to them. They are the only one who can use it. We know the alternative (buy our own) but would like to avoid the expense...Any suggestions on what to say to convince the mother to change her mind?
Thanks.
I agree with you need to pay for half of it. Why do you get the benefit of it, but not have to help pay for it?
Have you offered to pay half the cost of your stepdaughter's current pass? It would save both you and her mom some money.
I agree, offer to pay for half and then she can use it with you.
While we don't have issues like that because we work together, there are some feelings sometimes of "Hey, we paid for it, why do THEY get to enjoy it?" We do not allow those feelings to be known to my SD or her mother, but they do exist. We just bury them because it's better for my SD. I can see that a relationship that's not as good might allow those feelings to surface and be known.
Just offer to pay for half of the pass. It will benefit everyone, your stepdaughter most of all.
I've never been there but a friend of mine works there. He's the stunt coordinator. He's an amazing guy for sure. His mom and dad are super special to me.
I think that perhaps even offering to pay for the pass outright would be an offer you could make if she didn't accept the idea of paying half. That is silly, if the girl has a pass in her name already she should have use of it full time.
Is there any way to just go and say she lost it? Is it filed under her name in any way?
It doesnt make sense to me either, but honestly to avoid all the drama with the ex. I would just buy your own pass. They are only $66 for the year. I know,
why spend the money, but it it worth the hassle. My answer wold be no. Good luck. T.
What reason does the mother give for not being willing to share? Ask her and then respond to her reason. If it's the cost, offer to pay her. If it's that she doesn't want your daughter to have the same sort of fun with you that she has with her, then I'd buy a pass to some other attraction and have a different experience with your daughter.
I, too, suggest that this situation is not worth the drama it's causing. If the mother is firm in her opinion then just let it go and find another activity to enjoy with your daughter.
She is your daughter, too, tho a step-daughter. However, let your husband be the one who deals with his ex. Know that emotions are not logical and don't try to make sense of what the mother says or does.
Realizing that he does pay child support this is still a purchase that she chose to make with her income considered. Yes, it seems a bit trivial since it is for the child's enjoyment but maybe offer to reimburse half of the cost so that the pass may be shared between the families. That seems to be the road she is looking to travel. If not, then she has her own reasons and they are not worth worrying about.
Good luck..
Wow. She's clearly not being an adult.
I would offer to pay for 1/2 the cost of the pass, which would save them BOTH money, that is, unless your husband already pays for all of it with child support.
If that doesn't work, but her a new pass. That will stop the drama and it'll make her look like an idiot. She'll probably be pissed that you went ahead and bought it.
