Separation Anxiety - Oviedo,FL

LOL...both my boys were like that at that age. I just thought it was normal. They grew out of it, and now at 2yo and 3yo they happily stay with the sitter.

Right Back post: http://www.mamasource.com/request/10024264596048576513

what worked for me is to make up a sign (there probably is a REAL sign, but just pick what you want)
I make an 'X' with my 2 pointer fingers and I cross them and tap them- one on top of the other- and say to baby at his level- I look him in the eye-
and I say "Mama will be RIGHT BACK! RIGHT BACK!" I don't scream like I'm angry or anything- I just really emphasize the words RIGHT BACK and then I go pee or whatever and then when I come back I say "See? Mama is RIGHT BACK!" and I do the sign again...soon he understands and doesn't get so upset when I leave.
I did this with my son who is now 4 and now with my now 12 month yr old
it really helps!!!

sounds odd but it works- if they 'know' what's going on (you telling them) then they feel better :-)

start by doing this at home for teeny tiny things like going to pee, answer the phone, etc...

good luck!

You have gotten some good advice so far. I just wanted to reinforce the idea that it might be really smart to have your child get used to someone or a situation first. I am a university professor and when my now three year old was younger and I wanted to leave him with a sitter (most likely a college student that I trusted) I would set it up with a play date before hand. Maybe invite the sitter over to play with him for an hour and then send the sitter home. Sounds a little excessive but all I had to do was set this up with a few people so that I had options. The point is setting a positive environment before pushing him into a more stressful situation. I think Kai cried for every sitter I left him with till he was about two. However, most of the time they said he cried for 10 minutes or less and eventually not at all. It is just a new and scary situation for your little one. But like everything else she will learn to cope. And ultimately what you are doing is allowing her to practice the skills that she will need more full time in the future. Don't feel too guilty... you have to leave her sometimes. And as you know with your three year old time will pass by quickly! It won't be too long before she confidently says good bye and settles down for good playtime with someone other than you.

It is very normal for a baby of her age to experience separation anxiety. It will pass! Trust me..soon she'll be 13 and you'll have no problems with her not wanting to leave you! :>) It may not be because of the fact that you stay at home now. I have stayed at home with all 4 of my kids and 2 would go anywhere and 2 would cry and cling. It could just be more of a personality thing.
Just try and hold her close and enjoy this time in her life. IT IS SO BRIEF!! I know it may FEEL like forever but trust me! don't blink! She be grown and you'll wish for the day when she clung to her mommy! Blessings,M.

Actually, K., I'm not responding to your initial question, but I was curious about your wanting a dog. I have a cousin in Tennessee who runs a collie rescue operation. Would you be interested in a collie? If so, let me know, and I'll get word to you about my cousin's address and phone number. I don't know where you live.

L. Hoppock
Thomasville, GA
____@____.com

yOU TAKE HER FROM her SECURITY AREA and give her to a strainger. Try it in reverse invite sitter to dinner and /or play day. Then have the sitter come to your house. And start slowly taking her to sitters
My mom had to take my son while I was hospital. Mom came to get him so he'd feel like he was special and got to go to Grandmommy's not that I took him up to her and just dumped him off. My parents even toook him to visit his sister "we can't take her home yet, she's not done yet" She was 5 weeks early and 4#10 oz. You can get a purebred 100% American mutt at the pound beagles are good for kids

The child care at the YMCA is totally foreign to her. Separation anxiety is a normal part of development (a good thing). So keep that in mind when you are introducing new things to your daughter. I'm sure that if you talk to the staff, they will let you come in and stay WITH her in there for a few minutes. Then leave (both of you together). You may need to do this several times, each time getting the staff to interact more with her and you with her less, before leaving (both of you together). You also can work on this in other settings, with people she already knows or is familiar with (a playgroup, a friend of yours, church family). If you attend church, does she ever stay in the nursery there? When you hang out with friends, do they ever hold her while you do something else (use the restroom, load something in the car, etc)? Start incorporating these little moments into her life, and she will learn that she is still okay. It won't happen overnight. But in time, she should become more comfortable with a caregiver that is not you, and you will be able to let someone else watch her for short periods of time (long enough for a workout). Not necessarily happy (at least in the first 5 minutes after you leave, lol) but comfortable.
Good luck and be careful. It can be a vicious cycle if you're not careful (she cries so you don't leave her with anyone, so you can't leave her with anyone b/c she cries, etc).

Hi K., I just wanted to tell you that I could have written this exact request--I also have a 3 year old (girl) and a 10 month old girl. My baby is super attached to me, too, and I just wanted to let you know that I share your exhaustion and frustration!! I just keep hoping she'll eventually grow out of it, and I do try to leave her with my parents or in-laws for short periods of time. Good luck and if you find anything that works, please let me know! :)

Good Day K.,
I personally would suggest that you leave her with a personal baby sitter who may have other children. We are cheaper then most daycare centers; and the other kids will distract her of the anxiety by playing and hugging her! Then as she gets older you may want to try pre-school for her-or Head Start which is a wonderful program. I wish you the best. God bless you and your daughter & son.
Truly
K. N.
PS: I live in Margate & have two girls I am raising. 4 & 7 yrs. old.

She'll grow out of it. She's still so young. So, bear with it and get her used to the separation a few minutes at a time. Start by leaving the room and telling her "I'll be right back" and then walk out of the room and right back in before she can even think about it. Use this technique a few times a day, not all day long, as it will become a game that will only frustrate you more. When the phone rings, or a knock on the door, or you have to go to the bathroom, this reinfocement will create a trust that you will be "right back". It will eventually work at the gym, or when you leave her with a sitter.
I used this with my youngest, in particular, as his brothers were in school and it was me and the baby most of the day...and he was really attached to me.
It's exhausting but won't last forever....
Blessings
PS I also tell this to our dog when we leave her alone.
If looking for a dog, please visit my friend's website, as he allows free advertising to pet owners: Living Fla.com. He'll hook you up with the Humane Society or someone perhaps is looking for a new owner. Your nearby vet will let you post a notice. Gee, a dog will be a great addition to your family and give your daughter a distraction! Also, allow the children to keep an eye on the water and food dish, creating responsibility. They are still a bit young to take on a walk, and actual feeding; but they can learn to use a brush...A "rescued" dog is a grateful pet...by the way. Collies and Labs are wonderful with children; but they shed. A smaller dog (which I have, as I told my boys "I want a small, short-haired girl this time", after our male Collie passed...)
that is so loving is (my) Cocker Spaniel. I keep her haircut short....I could go on but I'll end here.

Practice having a sitter come over to your house to play with her & interact with her while u are there a couple of times so that she gets used to that person.