My son turned one on July 25th. We moved to a new house on July 19th. Our lives have been so hectic lately and his schedule is all kinds of screwy. We're trying to get established in our new routine, but we're still unpacking and have lots of other things going on. When I drop him off at the sitter's in the morning, he cries and clings to me. I know this is normal with all the changes recently and for his age, but what can I do to make this a little easier on us both. My sitter is my cousin and he absolutely loves her and when I pick him up he'll love all over her before we leave so I know it's not an issue that he has with her. I just want to make his morning a little less stressful...and mine too. I'm 5 months pregnant and I have to try really hard not to cry all the way to work. Hormones!
Dear B.,
Suzi is right. 1) Advance preparation for the day and routine is great for kids and 2) the quicker the hand-off, as much as you want to hang around for the hugs and kisses, the better off you and he will be.
He will adjust, children are tougher than we are.
God Speed, M. N.
you poor thing! hormones aren't helping any i'm sure. you can try spending a little extra time with him when you can, just you and him time, but really the best thing to do is make the goodbyes quick and hopefully a little less painful. the longer you draw it out the worse it will be for him, poor thing. it's not easy, i know but it will get better. hang in there!
I agree with the others and with you that a lot of it probably has a lot to do with all the changes but don't forget that the baby on the way is a major factor in all of this too. I know your son seems young to even understand what it means but believe me, they get it far earlier then you might think. My girls are 19 months apart. We never said anything to the oldest about having another baby. We never had too. She knew there was a baby in mom's tummy. We took her with us to the ultrasound and she threw a fit because the tech was touching my belly. She wouldn't let my husband touch my tummy for a while either. SO, remember that he is dealing with all of the changes in mommy at the same time as everything else. This probably won't help with the morning routine but it might help in other areas.
Hi B.! Congrats to you on making it through the day! haha The first thing I thought of when I read your post was, "Is your son's room put together in the new house?" What about a special peaceful place the two of you had in your old house? Is that area "recreated" in the new house? My son was 2 when we moved a few years ago. We were building, so we were in a temporary situation in a teeny tiny house. We put most of our things in storage, but there were some things that we kept out that made everything familiar to him. We put everything from his room in the temp. house, the recliner we cuddled in, things like that. He adjusted very very easily.
Your son's world is totally upside down right now, so anything familiar to his usual routine, familiar smells, no matter how small it may seem to you will help. At 1 year, babies still thrive on routine and familiarity. If at all possible, even try arranging his room, the living room, etc. as much like the old house as you can for now until he gets used to his new home. Hope this gives you some ideas!
-E.
Sad to say, you can't actually stop him from feeling the anxiety. But you can talk to him on the way about how much fun he will have. When there, hand him off quickly and leave immediately even if it means peeling him off of you. He'll stop crying and forget it completely a long time before you do.
There is one thing that does work with some of my kids but only if it's at the right time of day and only if the provider is willing. When a child of mine is going through this, I keep snacks handy and put the other kids to the table the 2nd I see their car pull up. Then when I open the door I tell them they are just in time for a snack and mom puts them in their chair or highchair. For some kids this keeps them from even thinking about crying.
Suzi
