while i do not live in inwood/washington heights, i can assure you that there are mothers, children, families, etc. like you in that community who also want a safe and healthy place to live. go ahead and look around. do not let people discourage you. that is a great place to be and you could be moving in just in time before it becomes very expensive.
don't get dsicouraged if it does not remind you of the upper east side. sometimes the blocks are safer with these "guys" hanging on the corner at night than when it is all quiet and peaceful on the streets. go ahead and find a place and who knows? you could end up being a part of an active community group that has brought the kind of environment(safe streets, clean building, great schools, great parks, etc.) that even affluent neighbourhoods lack. and if there is no such group, maybe you could be a leader working for whatever change you would like to see. hey, you could be the next council person from up there!!!
oh by the way, there is a geat park/garden up there. i have forgotten the name. it is not the cloisters or wave hill; it is smaller but just as beautiful.i found it when i was parking my car to go to an event about 3 years ago.
inwood is great and has lots of energy. you will have fun. by the way, the affluent upper east side is not very safe. we just don't hear the police reports (not good for the image of he neighborhood)!so go out there and be open. you never know the blessings that await you.
good luck and let us know how it goes.