Seeking Help with Questions to My Baby's Day Care

Hello C.,

I run a daycare out of my home and what I started doing a few years ago was keeping a log of some of the things the child was doing during the day so that the parents can go home and read about any important events. I also use my digital camera often throughout the day, so I will email pictures when the baby does something cute or a peaceful photo of the baby sleeping, etc. I would recommend that you ask for all this and more, it really isn't difficult to send a photo or set up a time to speak to the provider during the children's nap time.
good luck,
R.

C., I am a childcare provider (without openings, so I'm not trying to promote myself). Assuming you're calling her during "down" time: Your discomfort about calling her is concerning to me. You shouldn't have to feel that way. She should have respect for your bond with your child, and your (every parent's) conflicted feelings about being away from your child. You shouldn't feel like you need to lead the conversation; she should be ready to give you details.

To give you a comparison: I keep a "Daily Infant Report" each day with food, diaper changes, curriculum (physical/social/cognitive activities: description and how it relates to development), disposition, cute stories/responses. Each day, put together, tells a story to put in a baby book. Some parents call more often than others. The first question is, "How is (child) doing today?" I say, "Great/a little rough/wild (etc.)." Then I elaborate. I talk about situations and how I've handled them, or give a cute little story about them - and always intend to put the parent at ease.

If your daycare provider makes you feel like you're imposing, incompetent or "paranoid," MOVE ON.

J. Smithson
Loving Hands Learn 'n' Play
http://www.lhlearnandplay.com

Hello,
You should try not to feel uncomfortable checking up on your child. It is your right and obligation as a parent to make sure everything is good concerning the Little One. Here are a few questions that you can ask everyday? What did she eat? How much did she eat? Did she like what she ate? Did she cry a lot today? Was she fussy? Gassy? Did she sleep all day? What time did she go to sleep? What time did she wake up? Did she act like she had enough rest? How was her bowl movement? Was there any bowel movement? Did she fall down? crawl around? Did she play any? What did she play? Did she play with any other kids? How did she play with the other kids?
Hope that helps

I am also a daycare provider. I have parents that call frequently when they initially start and parents that never call (go figure). It is normal for parents to call in the beginning but I would have to say that after a few months if you have the feeling that you still need to call, there must be something else going on. All daycare providers should have a daily routine for you. Most daycares will take pictures, either using your camera or theirs. Just one thing to think about......if the provider is on the phone, they are not watching kids. If your concerns are are about food, activities, temper, emotions, these are all legitimate, but need to be discussed with the provider after care or discussed during an arranged meeting. If you have feelings that your child is not happy, or being mistreated, then I would say that it is okay to call everyday or even do some announced visits. I have been on both sides. My 10 year old son (now) was in daycare when he was 3. I did call the first month checking on him. Now I am a provider and understand the need for mothers to know. I am very consious of this, but do stress the safety reasons for being on the phone everyday. Hope this helps.

How long has your baby been in daycare? Are you uneasy about the care she is getting there which causes you to call them daily? It's every parent's right to call their child's care-giver whenever they feel they need too...and likewise, care-givers know that they will get calls from parents everyday...it's part and parcel to the nature of their job. Usually... care-givers WILL call the parent if anything is 'wrong' with your child on any given day, or if the parents request it, or if the child is going through any illness or emotional/physical/medical problems. They have laws they have to comply with, as a care provider. At any given time, the care givers are very busy... they have many children to care for, feed, change, supervise, tend to etc., so sometimes it is hard for them to stay on the phone. Or, sometimes they will utilize 'nap' times as a moment when they can communicate with the parents, return phone calls etc. ALSO, if you did not receive one, MOST or ALL providers WILL give you a daily 'schedule' of their daily routines....so that you can indeed KNOW what your child is doing each day. And, they usually have 'open-door' policies and you can stop by at any time. There is a flip side to everything. AS a MOM.. certainly you have the right to call them anytime and ask how your child is doing etc. If you do this everyday, then surely the provider should know what main things to summarize for you. Is your child at a day care CENTER or with a single baby-sitter? This makes a difference. But there are main things any parent or provider will go over... eating, napping, any bowel changes, social problems or not, sickness or not, and developmental changes/problems/advances observed, etc. Unless there is anything specific to your daughter's care which is unique, then that is typically the norm. ONE GOOD idea... which some providers do, is.... have a standard form or checklist which they fill out everyday... FOR THE PARENT. Thereby, the Parent can 'see' what it is their child is doing, and how they are doing on a regular basis...and this sometimes replaces the need for daily phone calls, which is not always possible. You can also schedule a 'sit-down' with your provider and talk about your child's care, when you feel the need. PERHAPS... you too, can make a "check-list" for yourself.. of things you want to know from the baby-sitter...then you won't forget to ask her when you get off the phone.
Hope this helps. Good luck!
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

Hi C.,

I have 3 kids. Mine are all grown, but I remember how concerned I was when someone else would care for them.

You can ask questions like what she ate for breakfast or lunch and how much she ate. You can ask if she took a nap and for how long. You can also ask how she thinks you baby is feeling. Like did she notice a running nose, was she coughing or pulling at her ear.

I hope this helps. I know it difficult to leave your children with someone else and when you do call you sometimes forget what to ask. You just want to know that they are fine. Good luck!

E.