Seeking Clever Ideas to Get a Smart and Stubborn Toddler to Brush Her Teeth

I always give the same advice on this one: sit on her, pry her mouth open, and brush her teeth. You're stronger than she is.

I brush my 19 month old's teeth right after his bath when he is wrapped tightly in his towel so that he can't push the toothbrush away. Works like a charm!

The little battery operated or electric ones worked for us. They have one now that plays a song so they have to push the brush on their teeth to hear the music.

If she hasn't seen a dentist yet, you could take her in to see a pediatric dentist in your area - I'm a pediatric dentist in the city (and a mother of a 6 month old - so I know what you're going through). The AAP and AAPD recommend that every child get their first dental checkup by 12 months of age. This way, she can get her teeth checked, just to make sure that the yellow plaque isn't starting any cavities. Also, it sometimes just help to have someone else (the dentist in this case) tell your daughter how important it is to brush and keep her teeth clean. I tell my patients that it's great they want to brush themselves,but mommy and daddy have to help too. After an appointment, I always praise my adorable patients (even if they had a hard time), and firmly, but gently give them instructions. I would highly recommend going to a pediatric dentist since we're trained to work with little children, but there are also wonderful general dentists too that can do a great job with kids.

What worked for us was telling our son that he could brush his teeth however he liked after he let me/his dad brush his teeth. Then we let him chew the silly thing to his heart's delight and just bought new toothbrushes more frequently. Also, there are electric toothbrushes appropriate for toddlers. Just be sure that the bristles are soft so that they don't hurt her gums (she might be too young for this still -- not sure). With the electric brush, the brushing time you do get is more efficient. Good luck!

have you asked her to brush yours? i told my stubborn son that i needed him to brush my teeth and if he did i would brush his. i let him brush mine (with my tooth brush of coarse) and then he opened up and let me brush his. he also got a kick out of standing on the counter so he could watch in the mirror. you just have to hold onto her so she doesnt fall with one hand and do the brushing with the other. good luck

My son was the same way. He did not buy into the "this is so much fun" thing at all. So I decided to be very frank with him (in an age appropriate way). I explained that there are "plaque bugs" who try to live in our mouths and we have to scrub them off or they will bit our teeth. I let him brush first then take over to "check." I say "Oh there's one... I'll get it." He is now 2 1/2 and is very easy about brushing and flossing because he really doesn't want to have buggy teeth.

Also, if you aren't already using one, get an electric toothbrush. They are easier because you don't have t do as much scrubbing and way more effective especially if she won't let you get in there as well as you want to.

Hope this helps.
T.

hey L. :)

my 21 month son is the same way! we've tried it all and now the only way we can get them clean is by holding him in a big bear bug while one of us brushes his teeth. we sing and talk to him while doing it. he definitley fights us on it and that has been really hard for us. we believe in gentle parenting and the thought of forcing something is a huge turn off to us, but it came down to parenting style vs. the effects of cavities on a small person and his oral hygeine won out. please let us know if you find anything that works better so it's not a fight!

Hi L.,

To get my 16 month old daughter to brush I put her on a step stool and we brush our teeth together. I have a sonicaire toothbrush, and she wants to do everything that I do, so I got her an electric toothbrush as well. I found that if we do it together and she uses a similar toothbrush she will emulate me. She even spits when I do!

Good luck.

I just got "Firefly" toothbrushes (at Wal Mart) for my 4 and 2 year old. They have lights that blink for 1 full minute. My issue was getting them to brush longer- then I check their teeth. I always laugh and make a game of "Oh look how pretty your teeth are- especially that one (and I brush it a little), but maybe I like this one more (and brush a different one. If it gets to the point where they are crying because we don't want me to do it, I just force the issue (crying means I can see the teeth anyway), and then I am extra snuggly with story time.

Hi L.,
Check out my profile to see my dental experience. At this age it is a power struggle and one you don't want to lose. What you may need to do is lay her in your lap with her head between your knees, basically pinning her down, and brush thoroughly while she cries. If you think it will get easier as she gets older without taking a serious stand now you are wrong. I kind of looked at it the same way I did about diaper changes. We were doing it and that is final. I never waited for her to "let" me brush, I just did what ever necessary to get the job done thoroughly. I would tell Paige that if she would just hold still with her mouth open then I wouldn't have to hold her down. I kept reminding her that SHE made this choice, not Mommy, by not cooperating. Don't give in, Early Childhood Caries is on the rise and getting fillings done on a toddler is not fun or cheap. Anyone who says to not worry about it as those teeth are her "baby" teeth and will fall out anyway are uninformed as to all the reasons for primary teeth. Not to mention that leaving untreated decay in a child's mouth is considered neglect. If you have ANY dental questions, email me.
Sincerely,
L.

I didn't have such trouble with my kids, but I bought a musical toothbrush for my niece. The song plays for 1 minute and she'd cooperate while the song was playing. I got it through my Avon rep.

www.youravon.com/susannecampos

Mom of 4: girl, boy, boy, and baby due in 3 wks.

We talk about the sugarbugs in my 2yr olds mouth from the food she eats throughout the day. I tell her I see them flying around in and out of her mouth. She gets so excited to brush her teeth and get the sugar bugs. Often she says she sees more and wants to brush her teeth again!!

Didn't get a chance to read all the responses, but here is what I did with my son who is now 2 and loves to brush his teeth...

He gets to stand on the counter! I hold him and brush his teeth while looking in the mirror. This seemed to be our winner, but here's other things to try.

Open your mouth wide, like you need her to do and hum songs like twinkle twinkle little star, they think the sound is funny.

Start listing all the foods they ate that day... I would say, "oh, there goes your carrots and rice, I got the turkey out" it's usually another cause for a smile.

Lay her across your lap and hang her upside down. This worked wonders when my son was smaller, he thought it was a game.

Let them play for a second after your done, give her her turn. Great way to learn.

Keep it light and happy and not scary. Hope you find your trick!

Hi L.,

Finn wasn't a big fan either. Did the exact same thing with chewing on the brush but wouldn't let me brush. It's strange but if I put him in his highchair and go behind him, I can brush without issue. We don't do any songs or anything, I just get the job done so it's quick. Oh, and I always give him a big thank you and smell his breath and say "mmmmmmmm!!! much better". That gets a smile which is the note I want to end on. Worth a shot!

Good luck!
T.

I had the same problem with my 2yo...He likes to growl and roar so we tell him to do that so we can get some brushing in while his mouth is open! :) I also found that he is more likely to do things if we are doing them too, so we have tooth brushing time together. I brush my teeth while he brushes his, and then I finish up for him. That seems to work. Of course, lots of praise too. I also have him spit out the toothpaste (ideally), and brushing teeth is the only time he gets to spit so I think he likes that, too. Good luck. :)

The only way I was able to get my 17mo old to let me brush her teeth was to let her brush mine. I stood her on the counter top and helped her brush my teeth. Then I said, "OKAY!!!! Mommy's turn!!!" She lets me brush hers. She likes it cause its a game. Whenever she starts resisting we switch turns. Now when I ask her if she wants to brush her teeth she runs to the bathroom.

Perhaps try changing toothpastes - maybe she doesn't care for the taste of the one you're using. also, maybe she wants to try it herself. Hand her the toothbrush and see what happens.

Hey L.,

This sounds familiar. The "trick" I'm using with my 13 month old girl is to look in the mirror and have her show me her teeth (by smiling) and then I get a few brush strokes in at a time. She also likes to watch me brush mine, so I sometimes do mine first, and somehow having a visual (me/the mirror) seems to help. I'm not sure if it's just distraction, or she likes to be able to see what she's doing. She seems to understand and like the idea of washing things, so I sometimes call it "washing" her teeth.
You may need to go back to using a very thin baby washcloth over your finger to get her front teeth clean.
Just my thoughts... Good luck.

I have the same problem. I make sure we follow a routine is to change her clothes and then immediately brush her teeth in the morning. That way, she knows what to expect. I also make sure she's brushes her teeth immediately after her bath at night. I use an electric toothbrush, so it goes faster. They are impatient at this age. I tell her that I'm getting the bugs that eats up teeth off her teeth. The most effective things I've tried is not to stress out, but hug her, while saying loving things to her, immediately before you gently brush her teeth. She then knows that what you do next to her is safe to trust. If I'm upset or stressed out, she can sense it and then she gets upset or stressed out too.

Try taking her shopping for a spin brush with her favorite character on it. My son lets me brush with Spiderman. Plus, the spinning action gets the teeth cleaner if you only have a brief window of opportunity. They cost about $7. Good Luck!

L.,

I would recommend a motorized/ battery operated tooth brush with a fun character on it. My daughter is 2 years old and I recently purchased a Dora the Explorer tooth brush; she loves brushing her teeth now. My dentist suggested the battery operated toothbrush for its ability to clean the teeth well, that it encourages children to bruch their own teeth and also prepares them for future dentists visits. Hope this helps.
- T.

Bribery. Sticker chart to save up for toys. Don't make it a battle, just tell her you reward kids that brush their teeth.

I would tell my little guy that I had to get the 'sugar bugs'. Then pretend that I was trying to find them in his mouth. He would always start laughing and open up. Hope it helps. Good luck.

Hi L.,

As some other mommies have said here, I usually take my daughter with me when I brush my teeth. She used to put her finger in her mouth and make the motion when she would see me. Now she does her on her own (she is also 15 months), I do help her though, I usually say here we go and start first on her teeth then she starts pulling the toothbrush so I let her do if for a few seconds then I take it again.

Also, if he is teething that would help getting him to brush. I found that my daughter would want to brush even the molars when she was teething.

K.

I would try changing toothpaste flavors (stick to unfloridated though). Then, my kids always loved this song I made up (we'd sing it twice through to make sure we got all the teeth, you can make up more verses, of course) - sung to Row, Row, Row Your Boat:
Brush, brush, brush your teeth, brush them up and down, brush each and every one, brush them all around.
Brush, brush, brush your teeth, brush them front and back, brush each and every one, get rid of all the plaque.
Brush, brush, brush your teeth, open nice and wide, brush each and every one, make sure they're shiny bright.
Brush, brush, brush your teeth, brush them bottom and top, brush each and every one, until it's time to STOP!!!
Good Luck.

Here's what worked for us:
Brush your teeth while she's brushing hers and then "finish up," see how many teeth you can brush while someone else counts to 10 (very slow or do 9.1, 9.2, etc.), let her watch in the mirror, and change toothpaste (turned out my daughter did not like the flavor). We also took our daughter to a pediatric dentist and talked about what they said about brushing. We also have a book about hippos that shows them w/ their mouths wide open so we ask her to show us her hippo mouth.
The main thing is that nothing works for a long period of time, you have to keep changing things around!!
Good luck.

Hi L.,

We had the same problem with our daughter. We tried everything from singing, telling stories, being silly, letting her brush our teeth, letting her stand by the sink, to forcing her to open her mouth. She enjoyed everything (except the forcing part) but still refused to be brushed. We even had her watch her 4 yr old cousins brush their teeth. Then a few months later she just changed. Suddenly one day, she opened her mouth and let us brush her. The next day she fought a little and I noticed that as soon as I took my hand off her shoulder, she re-opened her mouth. Turned out she didn't want to feel held down in any way. After that, it was much easier to brush her teeth. I encourage you to keep trying the different tricks that other moms here have shared. One day the day will come when your daughter will just voluntarily cooperate. Good luck!

We introduced our son to teeth brushing by letting him watch us brush our teeth. He is super stubborn, and we knew that it could easily turn into a battle. He is also ultra competitive, so as soon as he started asking about it, pointing when we did it, and so forth, my husband and I talked out loud in front of him, things like "I don't know if he's old enough" and "He's too young to be able to handle it" (reverse psychology has always worked really well with him - I know he knows we're playing him, but it still works!). Well, seconds later his mouth was wide open and ready to brush! He likes to chomp down on the brush when we're brushing his teeth, because he says it tickles, but we just keep saying "Open wide" and "Look at the ceiling!" to get his head back for easy access. Then, we let him "brush" his own teeth after we've done a good once over, and he basically just chews the heck out of the brush, which is why we bought a five-pack of them from Walmart! Also, he knows that if he doesn't cooperate with us brushing his teeth, he doesn't get to do it himself afterward; we just put it away. Might not work for everyone, but it works for us!

Also, he loves the Strawberry flavored toothpaste for kids from Tom's of Maine - all natural! Just be warned: it foams way more than any toothpaste I've ever used, so make sure you don't put too much on the brush!

You can use an electric toothbrush or ones that make music.

I look for favorite characters that are hiding in my 3 yr old and 21 months mouth. We brush all the princesses out of my daughter mouth and for my son we find sesame street characters or Thomas trains. I also let them pick out their own toothbrush and toothpaste when we are shopping which they find to be a big treat. The dialogue sounds a little like this..."open wide I think I spot Cinderella at the back, say grrr like a lion (they bare their teeth) so that I can get those front teeth, oh no cookie monster is gettting away open wide again so that I can grab him with the tooth brush" Our dentist talks to them about sugar monsters eating sticking to their teeth and how important it is to brush them away, so you might wast to enlist help from you daughter's dentist. Sometimes when an adult other than a parent tells them they need to do something their is less of a fight. I also let them brush their teeth first and then "check" their teeth after when I find the characters. Good Luck

I don't know if your daughter is old enough for this but with mine we've been looking for suger bugs for a long time. Now that she's 3 we look for her favorite charators like the princesses and dora or go diego go. We pick a different theme and as I brush I chase them around in her mouth till one by one they are all tickled and spit out. She loves it!