Seeking Advice on Sleeping Habits of 4 Month Old

Amanda,
I had tremendous success with swaddling. I would change my child's diaper, feed him, then swaddle him and put him down in his crib/bassinet. He slept much better that way. I used a waffle-weave type of blanket that had some give to it, and I would swaddle him pretty tight. I found that if he managed to get his hand and/or arm out, he would wake up much earlier than if he stayed swaddled.
I hope this helps. Good luck!
C.

I had to do the same with my twins when they were that age. I eventually put them in their crib with a musical nightlight hooked to the crib and when they woke up during the night and did not need feeding, I turned it on and they zonked right back out. But I was constantly waking up and having to walk with them (I never got sleep b/c my ex was not helpful at all), which wears you out quickly. This worked well for me and hopefully it will for you too! (I used the musical nightlight even during their naps and that helped keep them asleep longer).

she might need her own space maybe I would not suggest letting her cry it out I was going to do that but, I ddin't want her to think I wasn't going to be there when she needed me. But, I did realize that she needed her own space and room to sleep in
when ever I let my daughter sleep with me she would toss and turn move around everywhere she would sleep and I wouldn't. Another thing I got for her to help sleep with a sound machine it works really good.I don't know if any of this will help but, my little G. is ten months now and sleeping through the night and 4 months she wasn't and I was thinking of things to do and those were some of them good luck

Is this the way she has always fallen asleep? I made the mistake when my now 3 1/2 month old was tiny of using the swing perhaps too much. She had a good bit of gas and it made her feel better, but now the swing is the only way she can really fall asleep.

She does sleep in her cosleeper, but is also fitful... Sometimes that is because they are learning a new skill, such as rolling over. When babies are working on new developmental milestones their sleep sometimes gets less predictable.

Try talking to her doctor, or calling and talking to the nurse. They have lots of experience and can usually steer you in the right direction.

Before I do any in-depth response...any chance your daughter has severe gas or reflux? These would cause sleeping problems. How is she sleeping by day? Any thought that she still has her days and nights mixed? How are her day naps? Need a little more info. TX

Amanda,

My daughter was the same way and we did not want to cosleep so after countless conversations with our ped we decided to go with Dr. Ferber method. You can do some research on it but it basically helps create an atmosphere where your child can put themseleves back to sleep if they wake up during the night. It also has a plan that has you put them down sleepy then as they cry you go in and comfort them on increasing intervals of time. It is hard to explain here but if you are at the end of your rope (which I was) check out the book and just glance through it.

Good luck!

My daughter had the same issue, however, she started this in her bassinet and then when she moved to her crib. This could be many things. She may be tired of sleeping in the same position, acid reflux, gas pains, allergy.... The list goes on. It is important to call the Dr because if it is reflux or an allergy the Dr will need to see your baby. In my case, she has a protien allergy and her formula had to be changed that day! She couldn't digest the milk protien very well and cause discomfort. Two days after the new formula she stoped crying. It was like magic! I would advise to call the Dr because you will be surprised how drastically things change when you find out what it is. Good luck!

It sounds to me like she needs a good swaddle. My son was the SAME WAY until we swaddled him and then he slept "like a baby!"
We swddledhim unil he was 13 months...he LOVED it!

Also, at four months old she is WAY to young to cry it out. I don't when remember when it's appropriate to start that but ask your pediatrician. I think it's closer to nine months or a year.

I totally understand how you feel, as i am sure many moms do:) i had the same [roblem with my daughter who is now 8months old. She would sleep great in her bassinet, anywhere from 6-8 hours at a time. Then when we switched her to her crib, she was waking up every two hours! I got no sleep and it was driving me crazy. So i did what i thought was best. I gave her her own room and i didn't get up at every little noise i heard her make. If she really needed me or wanted to be fed, she let me know it! She has been in her own room for almost 2 months now and usually she only gets up once to eat and that goes right back to sleep. Sometimes she sleeps thru the night! It may be hard at first to let the baby cry a little, but in the end it may work our great for your family and you can get some well deserved sleep!!! Best of luck to you!

Try this website. http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp

I have their book and they give wonderful advice on all of the things you mentioned in your blog. An entire section of their website is devoted to sleep problems (which covers co-sleeping) and fussy babies. Best of luck to you!

Hey Amanda,

I think the 4-month period is known for fitful sleeping. My babe had a phase like that at 4 months, and I was at the end of my rope for awhile too (she's 9 months now, and has had good periods & bad period esp while teething).

My best advice - let your babe know you're there when she cries for you, and at the same time, make some space for yourself at night if you need to. I know a lot of moms who start the night by putting babe to sleep in the crib, and then when they get up the first time that night, they'll nurse & co-sleep after that. We are about to transition from all-night co-sleeping to this method.

You might also look at Dr Jay Gordon's method of nightweaning. Hope this helps!

4 mths is still pretty young to expect much out of her and the a.m nap an hour and a half after she wakes is common. I think you'll just need to give her some time. It is very hard when you have been sleep deprived for so many weeks but it will get better. When my daughter was 9 mths I bought a book by West called Good Night Sleep Tight. The author is known as "The Sleep Lady" and she has a website you can look up though there isn't much info. It wasn't a complete miracle, but it did help. I don't like the "cry it out" or Ferber (I think that's the name) and even the guy who came up with it was all over the news about a year ago because they are finding that it tends to do some children more harm then good. The book I mentioned is a gentler approach though there are tears involved (on everyones part ;) Hang in there, in the grand scheme of life this actually goes by pretty quick. Try to sleep when she sleeps. Good luck!

My grandma and My Daddy always told me that as long as they are healthy and not hurt. That it is good for a baby to cry it out. As far as the fussing and waking I say she hungry. It won't hurt her to feed her two or three spoons of baby oatmeal before bed I bet tummys full and she's ready for sleep. Yes! You should put her back in her bed. She needs to learn independance at an early age , because if you don't later you will regret it. Later as she gets older it will feel like you have never cut the cord. Then again check with the Dr. to see if she has Colic.

Good Luck Keep Posted

Amanda,

My son is 3 months old and we had him in our room in a pack n' play until about a month ago. Once he outgrew the bassinet weight limit I started putting him to sleep in his crib/own bedroom, and I noticed he didn't wake up as often - possibly because he couldn't smell or hear us moving around. I also sleep better because I don't wake up at every little mumble he makes (and he mumbles alot!). He will sleep through the night occasionally, but for the most part he goes to bed around 7:30, I feed him before I go to bed at 10:30 - I pick him up in the dark, no talking , no eye contact, no diaper change unless its poopy- and I put him back to bed and he will sleep until anywhere from 3:30 to 7 am. If I am not ready to get up I repeat the whole feed and no talk routine.
Does your baby self soothe or do you have to rock/feed her to sleep? I have read a couple of books that really helped me out with putting the baby on a routine and helping them learn to self soothe. Let me know if you want more info on those...Good Luck!!
M.

My suggestion would be to let her "cry it out". I was a single mom for about the first several years of my son's life so I got in a habit of letting him sleep with me for no other reason than to reassure me that he was safe and okay (I came out of an abusive first marriage). However, many mothers preach against this and it is very hard to sit there and listen to your baby cry for his/her mommy. I also believe that no matter what advice you get from everyone else, you have to do what YOU feel in your heart is right. I was able to let my child cry it out but it didn't last long before he was sound asleep and sleeping in his own bed. If it had taken longer, I'm not sure if I would have been able to handle it. If you try this and it doesn't work, talk to your pediatrician. There may be something entirely different going on with her that you've never even considered.

Everyone, even babies need their own beds to sleep in. Where does she sleep during the day? If she is napping in her crib then you are half way there. Since she slept so well in her bassinet it may have been because it was a smaller/closed in space. Transitioning into the crib may feel like a large empty space where she doesn't feel secure. You might buy a port-a-crib which is much smaller or tightly bundle her into a small sheet (cut it down) or light weight blanket that is big enough. This will give her a very secure feeling. We used to use this method for babies and kids at the special ed school I used to work at. Try to limit her naps during the day so she will sleep better at night. It sounds like she has her days and nights mized up. Also try using the newer J&J night time bath products which will lull her into a calm sleep at least while you are getting her onto a schedule. Don't forget that all babies and kids need to be on a regular schedule; it makes them feel better knowing what to expect each day. I have found that the older ways are better for our children. I hate that now-a-days kids don't have the security of having their moms at home with them all of the time. It's sad that the economy dictates the need for moms to work now. My kid's pediatrician told me to feed them a night time bottle mixed with some rice cereal to make them feel fuller at night so that they would sleep better. I know that it isn't recommended these days, but it worked for me, my Mother, my Grandmother, etc. Like I said before the old ways worked. It didn't hurt my kids or the hundreds of thousands of other babies. Each child is different so try out anything that might be suggested until you find what works best for your baby. Ask your pediatrician for advice also, and by doing so he/she knows what's going on with your precious bundle. Good luck!

I also have a 4 month old. He requires his tummy to be super full before going to sleep. He'll nurse on both sides twice if need be. I have also given him a little cereal with fruit in the evening. He's pretty restless in the beginning when I lay him down, I just stoke his head a little and he seems to calm right down. He also needs his favorite blanket, does your daughter have something that she has to have with her? You could try that. Best of Luck.