Seeking Advice from Women Who Have Miscarried and Had to Have a DNC

Well, that is a tough question. I still occaionally think about my DNC. The procudere itself was not bad although I did take the meds they gave me afterwards. I was very down for about a week and then I dragged myself back to work. My RE put me on birth control for two months afterwards. We could start trying again after that.

Hi Jennifer,

I had a miscarriage at both 6 weeks AND 20 weeks. My doctor suggested I wait atleast 6 weeks for my body to strengthen up. However, after the 20 week miscarriage, it took 6 weeks before I could conceive, partly because I was suffering from depression. Hope this helps.

Hi Jennifer- I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriage. My husband and I also miscarried- we found out from the early ultrasound that the baby did not have a heart beat, and was not growing. It was also still inside me when we found out. We opted for a DNC instead letting it pass- I thought it would be better than waiting, and less emotionally taxing.
After the procedure, our doctor said to wait one regular cycle before trying again. We did just that and conceived about six weeks after the DNC.
Just remember that miscarriage is God giving you a second chance for a healthy baby!
My thoughts are with you.

hello, and I am sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I had a misscarriage at 11 weeks and had a DNC. The procedure is nothing to be concerned about. There was no pain even after. The only recovery you have to do is healing yourself. The pain of losing the baby is hard. I can't remember how long exactly it took to not feel bad anymore, but it does get better. You have to try to keep busy and not think about the what-could-have-been. keep good thoughts and try to remain positive.

So sorry for your loss. I had this procedure on an emergency basis several years ago. I had already lost much blood so my recovery was complicated by anemia. Make sure the drs test your hemoglobin after the procedure and be sure to take iron supplements if needed. The procedure itself was no big deal: no pain or discomfort after that I recall. I was quite upset, tho, and felt very fragile and emotional for 3-4 months. Later that year I got pregnant again almost exactly one year after conceiving the miscarried child. This pregnancy went well and I had my third child 7 years after the second one at the age of 42. A most happy ending!

Take good care of yourself - there is more to this than just the medical/physical side. Let your friends and family help you and take time to grieve.

Good luck.

Jennifer,
I am so sorry for your loss. Don't worry about the D&C, it is a quick procedure. I have had three miscarriages between 6 and 9 weeks. I had a D&C the 2nd time and should have had one the 3rd time. With the 3rd miscarriage, I had bleeding for 2 months. That was way too long. When I had D&C, bleeding stopped much faster. Just remember to rest a lot after surgery.
The emotional healing takes much longer. Hopefully you will have a successful pregnancy within 3 to 6 months. Just wait to try until you feel ready. Make sure you are not trying to forget this miscarriage by getting pregnant again. Your body knows. Good luck and stay strong.

I don't remember much of the actual DNC except that I had anesthesia and I was really nervous. I did take it easy for several days afterward and didn't feel like myself physically for about a week. I think we had to wait two or three months before trying to conceive again. After that though I conceived pretty quickly. I recall feeling bad about the miscarriage until I became pregnant. During those few months it seemed like I saw more pregnant ladies than ever at the stores and church. I felt sad when friends and family would announce their own pregnancies and when I saw newborn babies. It was particularly hard in that I had a cousin and a niece who had babies exactly around the time ours would have been born. It was encouraging how many other women shared their own miscarriage stories. Now I have a lovely little boy that I wouldn't replace for the world and I know that had I not miscarried, I wouldn't have this wonderful fellow.

I had two miscarrages & two DNC's to accompany them. They are no fun. The emotional part of it is the hardest. The physical part isnt that bad. To me it felt like an extreme pap being done. Each one was different from the other so i couldnt tell you exactly how it will feel or be done. We started trying as soon as the doc said it was ok. If i remember right it was only a couple of weeks. It took me about two years, a lot of talking about it, writing in my journal about it, and TON'S of tears shed to finally be able to think about it without crying. The only time i think about it now 9yrs or so later is when i see the protester's outside with the graphic signs for abortion's. If you want to ask me any other questions i wont hesitate to answer them or even if you would like to talk about it to someone i would be willing to be there for you. my email is ____@____.com and Peace!
K.

First of all...my heart goes out to you and I am sending you a great big hug. I am all too familiar with the pain of miscarriage as I've had 4. I've had to have a D & C only once however, and it was no big deal at all. I didn't want to have it. I started bleeding at 9 weeks and was going to try to let things happen naturally. I started having contraction like cramps one night and then began bleeding. There was so much blood (and clot like things) so I went to the hospital that night and had an emergency D&C. I'm so glad I did...I couldn't imagine having to go through bleeding like that all night. Besides, it could have been very dangerous. I do not agree with others who say it's ok to let your body take care of things naturally...that may or may not happen and if it doesn't you could face very serious problems that could eventually lead to difficulty getting pregnant, etc.
It seems as if doctors have many different opinions as to how long you should wait to try again. I think after a D & C it is not as long since all the tissue has been removed. On average I would say they'll tell you to have 3 normal periods before trying again. Of course some will say one period and some will say a year. ??
As far as my emotional healing, with each consecutive miscarriage it got harder and harder for me to deal with. My most recent one was about 4 months ago and although I was so completely despressed after it happened, I am doing a thousand times better now. The healing process is different for everyone and we all have our own way of going through it. My faith has helped me greatly. I understand many things about why those miscarriages happened to me. I still don't know if we will ever try again but I'm trying to learn throughout this whole process.
I often think about my little spirit babies up there who were just not ready to be born into this world yet. Perhaps they came to me for such a short period of time to help me to grow...perhaps they just wanted a small taste of what it is like to be a person again...in any case I know it was not random or "bad luck." It's hard to miss what you never had or love what you never knew...it's part of what makes the grieving so complicated as well as so sad. I will say a very special prayer for you...one that only another mommy who's lost the promise of their baby can know...
With Love and light,
T.

I also had a D&C following a mis. at 8 wks. The procedure was fast, relatively painless, just some dull soreness for a couple of days. I was able to conceive again just 2 months later but I miscarried then too. If you are still feeling really bad a bout the loss wait a few months. The first one was hard, the second tore me up. Its very common, 70% of all 1st time pregnancies are lost. But its also very emotional. I now have 2 juicy sons and I think of those miscarriages like my boys' "false starts". In my heart I feel that they have always been with me, but on their terms.
Sorry for your loss, seriously, a DNC is nearly benign, and give yourself grieving and healing time ( a few cycles at least.)

It's no big deal. Some very mild cramping afterwards. They typically want you to have one regular period before you attempt to conceive again. Sorry for your loss. and best of luck.

Jennifer,

I am so very sorry to hear about your miscarriage. Having had one myself earlier this year, I know that nothing I can say will make you feel 100% better. Just know that you are not alone. It is so common! I swear, after having mine, people started coming out of the woodwork to tell me that they had one, too...both of my sister in laws, my aunt, my own OB, the lady at the checkout counter, the list goes on. It's almost a "right of passage" for women these days.

The good news is that you know that you can conceive, keep that in mind. The emotional loss can be very painful for some women, while others view it as "a bad genetic match" and are able to move on quicker. I had a very hard time emotionally with mine, I was depressed and cried a lot (especially because we are going through infertility treatments). I was that way for a few weeks, and especially had a hard time being around my friends (or strangers in the doctor's office) that were pregnant. Not to mention your hormones are "adjusting back to normal"... When I thought I was "over it" about 3 months later, I found myself bursting into tears without warning, and when I mentioned to my Mom that I "thought I was over it," she said "M., losing a baby is something that you will never truly get over, you just move forward." I find this to be true. For me. Other women are vastly different.

In terms of waiting, it all depends on your doctor, age, and your body. I had heard to wait 3 months, but since I am 38, my doc only told me to wait one complete cycle before trying again. My first cycle after the D&C was a bit irregular, the bleeding started as spotting for a few days, then a flow that was different than my "usual" periods. One month after that, my cycle was back to normal.

The actual D&C I had done at Prentice Women's Hospital. The staff was great, and very sensitive to the issue. Just be warned that they might talk about dates of conception, and make you sign something that refers to "products of conception" (like do you want them to be tested in the lab). The procedure itself is relatively quick. They put me in a waiting room, called me back to a private dressing/recovery room, gave me an IV, a drug to relax me, wheeled me into the operating room, then once on the table in the OR gave me another drug that did not put me to sleep, but made me forget the entire procedure. I remember that the room was cold (I wore an exercise bra with no underwire and warm slipper socks with the gown). I remember seeing the table, a tray with tools, and <warning> the suction device, and an ultrasound machine. I do not remember any of the procedure at all, and just remember waking up in the recovery area somewhat upright, with those "hospital panties" now on, covered in blankets. They let me stay there with my husband until I felt well enough to get dressed. Then they wheeled me out to the car. Recovery wasn't bad, crampy and bleeding like a period for a day or two. They might give you perscription pain meds if you want them. If you can, I recommend that you have someone there to stay with you if you anticipate needing emotional support. My husband went to work the next day, and I got very depressed on my own. Another thing that I did not consider in advance is that my husband would be sad for the loss, too. I just wasn't expecting it.

I don't know if there is a way to find prior posts on Mamasource - I was worried about having a D&C vs. having a natural miscarriage and posted a question which received 40+ replies last end of June/early July. In a nutshell, a few of the moms said that the D&C is less painful than a natural miscarriage (which can drag out over weeks, and they want you to bring the "tissue" into the office sometimes). Some of the moms prefered letting it happen naturally, while other moms said that they needed a D&C anyway because their bodies did not pass everything on its own. If I ever, God forbid, need to do it again, I would definitely do the D&C without hesitation. Over and done with, and on the road to recovery.

Hope this helps. You are in my thoughts and prayers. And here's to a quick recovery. Lots of hugs to you.

M.

I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks and found out at 13 weeks and couldn't expel it either. The night before my DNC I started to but I couldn't completely expel everything so I ended up still needing a DNC. I was actually fine afterwards. I even went into the pharmacy with my husband and also walked up 3 flights of stairs when I got home (we lived in a condo at that time that didn't have an elevator). My doctor told me that we could try again after 3 normal periods. I ended up getting pregnant again about 6 months later.
I am sorry to hear for your lose. It is a terrible thing to go through. It was rough for me for the first 2-3 months. It was even worse because it was right after thanksgiving and I had just told all of my family and then with Christmas coming up it was even got worse emotionally. I was just glad that I was able to have another one when I did. Some people end up getting pregnant too soon and there bodies just aren't ready for it. Take your time and do what you need to do to recover emotionally and physically.

Jennifer,

Sorry for your loss...You will be put in a twilight and afterward will have a period...I don't remember for how long. Chances are high of conceiving shortly thereafter. It is up to you emotionally when you want to be ready for it. As far as how long it took to not feel bad...everyone's circumstances are different. It took me quite sometime, but I had a lot of anger along with it (this was 20 years ago). I had a brother in law who got his girlfriend pregnant, I was married. I felt it so unfair that someone like me who was doing it in the "proper order" (marriage, then pregnancy)had this happen to me. I had to sit back and watch the girlfriend go through the entire pregnancy and it was a constant reminder of what I had lost. So, like I said, everyone is different in how they handle their grief.

C. T.

Hi Jennifer
I am sorry that this pregnancy did not work out.I had a DNC between my first and second child.It was sad especially because the room that I waited in was the recovery room for women who had C-sections.I was able to leave the recovery and go to work after coming out of the anasthesia.The cramping felt like a bad period.I was able to concieve again in six months--my doctors reccomendation---and have had two more children and no more miscarriages.With the healthy pregnancy I was able to feel blessed and have a deeper understanding about the precariousness of life.I will keep good thoughts for you--L.

First off, let me start by saying I'm sorry for your loss. I had a miscarraige in March 2007 - I was 11 weeks old. I had heard the heart beat and had seen the baby and the beating heart on an internal ultrasound. I miscarried and expelled most everything but still had to have a d&c to make sure they got everything out. It was physically painless (more mental drain than anything else) and I was able to go home once I woke up and they saw that I wasn't sick or in pain. They gave me prescriptions for painkillers but I never needed anything other than Motrin.
I had to wait 6 weeks before I could try to get pregnant again and the good news was that I got pregnant right away and my daughter was born in January 2008. My doctor told me that usually after a D&C, getting pregnant is really easy because everything inside is clean and like new.
I wish I could tell you that I got over the miscarriage but I never really did. My brain tells me that something was wrong with the baby and that's why he/she was made into my guardian angel but my heart still misses the unknown angel.
Good luck with everything and if you need someone to talk to, I'm here. I understand what you went through. I hope your partner is more understanding and more compassionate than mine was. I imagine that would've been helpful. Good luck, Jenifer.

I had an ultrasound at 8 weeks that showed that I had an empty sac. But I didn't start miscarrying until 12 weeks. Within a week I was able to lose the placenta (after some tough contractions). I didn't have to have a DNC, so I can't speak to it.

I was real sad for a few weeks, it took months not to feel real sad about it and it still makes me sad when I think about it. What was real encouraging for me was that many of the women I talked to that had been through one had kids. This is true for me as well. Three months after my miscarriage I got pregnant again and gave birth a day or so after the anniversary of it.

Hang in there and allow yourself to be sad!

So sorry to hear of your loss. I too miscarried about 4 years ago or so. I opted for the D&C. This is how my experience went...Got to the hospital, waited, hung out with the hubby, then I had to get changed into a gown, lay in bed, wait some more. Once the Dr was ready, I had to be wheeled away into a recovery/waiting area, hubby could not go with. (I have contacts, so I had to wear my glasses and I had to leave them w/ husband so I couldn't see ____@____.com, that made me more nervous and scared) I waited there for ever, then they took me to the operating room, there were a handful of people there, I got pretty scared at that point. I got swabbed up w/ iodine down there, then had to breathe in the gas, fell asleep. Woke up in recovery feeling nauseus, got moved to a different waiting area where the hubby was. Layed around for some time with nurses tending to me. Got some crackers to eat because I was feeling hungover. Had to go to the bathroom before they would let me leave so they could check if the blood was clotting. Got home, slept and layed around. I felt fine the next day. Not sore or anything. I may be a little less emotional or attached than some women, because I moved on with life fairly quickly afterwards. I got pregnant with my son about 3 months after that. The plus side for me was that while I was pregnant with my son, I recieved extra special attention at the Dr's office after the miscarriage.
Good luck, and take care

I have had a total of 5 miscarriages. I had only 1 D & C. The last baby I lost I was 14 weeks. It took 4 dyas after I was told that the her heart had stopped beating before I actucally delivered her. I have ever gotten pregnant again. We adopted a beautiful little girl. Prior to that preganancy, I miscarried at 12 weeks and had to have a D&C. The procedure itself isn't rememberable. The sadness, however, lingers for months. I got pregant 9 months after that, but there are days and this is 7 yeras later that I'll have brief moments of sadness about the loss of my babies, but with each passing year the pain gets easier.

I'm very sorry to hear about your miscarriage. Before I had my trio, I underwent two m/c's and subsequent DNC's. In both cases it was a same day procedure that involved very little physical pain. After the first m/c, we tried right away for another child (we were doing IVF). After the second one, we took a very long break before trying again...like 4 years. The emotional pain took me longer to get over and quite honestly, it's never really left me but it has certainly lessened with timje. I have three beautiful children that I am grateful for but a small part of me will always mourn what I had lost.

Hi Jennifer,

I am so sorry to hear about your loss.

I have had two miscarriages which were followed by DNCs and to tell you the truth, it is the absolute best thing to follow a miscarriage. The second time, the baby had died and my OB-GYN told me that there was a great risk of setting up toxicity in my body that could have been fatal. The procedure does not take but a few minutes, and the recovery period is based upon your obedience to the doctor's orders. It can be less than a week.

The emotional side is a bit more intense and takes longer to recover from. That may affect your ability to conceive again afterwards, as well. I found that it was all about my attitude and my faith. My husband and I believed the doctor when he said that miscarriages are often God's way of dealing with pregnancies and/or births that have complications that He knows we are unprepared to deal with. We also truly believed that all things happen for a reason, and we were not reluctant to continue trying.

The first miscarriage I had was far more emotional, but it was also followed by another conception within 8 months. As a result, I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy who is now an adult.

Have you spoken with your doctor? Seek medical advice soon!

Best Wishes!

I had the same issue in 2004. I miscarried and had to wait 5 days for a DNC. There's really nothing to worry about from a surgical aspect. However, the pain from the procedure will be similar to a very heavy period and lots of cramping. It will take about 10-14 days for it to all go away. Just take it easy afterward.

My doctor told me I could begin trying to conceive again within 2-3 months, but I was not prepared emotionally. It took about a year for us to think about trying again, and i got pregnant within 3 months. Good luck and God bless.

I did not have a DNC, but I did learn that my pregnancy had 'failed' at 8 weeks, so I have been through what you are experiencing. Let me say that I am so sorry for your loss.

Although the pregnancy failed at 8 weeks (it was February at the time), my body did not resolve the loss until April. My ob/gyn and my reproductive endocrinologist wanted my body to resolve things on it's own but if it hadn't happened by a certain time then they would have considered a D&C.

The miscarriage started on my way home from work on a Friday and was like a very heavy period. It was only 'heavy' for a few days (3) then tapered off and my total time bleeding was about a week. About a week after that, I passed what looked like a 'flesh colored prune'. Alarmed, I called my doctor who told me that was a good sign; that the uterus was clearing everything out and soon I'd be ready to resume fertility treatments.

Fast forward to the second week of June, on vacation but not yet on the fertility treatments again. My husband and I got pregnant...4 months after a failed pregnancy, 2 months after the miscarriage, and 3 years after the beginning of fertility treatments.

I felt badly about the miscarriage for about two weeks, crying and depressed, feeling like I was a failure and incapable as a woman. Although this may or may not have been the case, after a lot of reading and research I felt that there had to be a logical explanation for why the pregnancy did not continue and there was nothing I did or didn't do to create that outcome.

I have had 2 miscarriges and an still birth. I had a DNC with my second miscarrige. They put you to sleep for the procedure and I honestly don't remember much about it excpet waking up and being put back to sleep. I do not recall any pain after the procedure. I waited a year until I got pregnant again. I now have a 13 year old daughter and 5 and 1 year old sons. Since my daughter I haven't lost any more children but I still sometimes feel the loss. I cannot tell you if the pain will ever fully go away. But it will lessen with time. just know that this was not your fault. And there was nothing that you could have done to prevent it. I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that this was helpful. And I will pray for you.

Let me first say I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage and D&C at approx. 11 weeks. The baby did not make it past 6 wks 3 days. The procedure itself was not horrible, they did the whole twilight sleep for me, and I work up pretty good. Obviously the emotional stuff was much much harder. I was okay physically, with bleeding of course, until about a week later and the cramps started. My doctor prescribed Vicadin but I didn't fill it until the pain started. My suggestions would be to fill any pain killer script in case you need it.

Remember, you will never forget this child. You love this child and the child will always be a part of you. There are many cliches out there to explain it away but they all suck!! What happened is horrible and it's okay to grieve. Time does make it easier and when your next child enters this world it helps as well. Lean on your friends and family, go to a support group (I know Edwards has one), create a memorial, seek a pastor or a counselor, take care of yourself. Give yourself permission to be sad. And remember that men grieve differently and even though they may not show it the same way, they are still grieving.

My doctor told us to wait two cycles after the surgery to start trying. After that it took us 3 cycles to get pregnant again. That was very hard....I constantly worried that I would lose the pregnancy. I was excited for every milestone that showed me the baby was okay....1st trimester being done, the 20 week ultrasound, 24 weeks when a baby could survive if born and 36 weeks when a baby is technically considered full term just with 4 more weeks of getting stronger. It was hard but worth it.

A friend who had a miscarriage about a yr before me told me the thing that helped her through hers. (Depending on what you believe....but this helped me)... Some day you will meet your baby in heaven. I will still meet my child someday. It helped me. I also like to say that God took my son back to make him more perfect!!! And he is!!!

Good luck. I believe it takes more faith to try again after going through this than to give up and not try again. God bless you!!

Hi Jennifer -
I'm sorry to hear of your loss. I miscarried at 10 weeks and the doctor initially wanted me to wait for "nature to take its course." Psychologically this was troubling to me and I brought up my concerns to him. He performed a DNC after 3 days. We were told to wait a while before trying again to have a baby. 2 months later we were on vacation coping with our then 2 year old's ear infection. I thought I was coming down with the flu or some sort of virus myself. Instead, I found out I was 8 weeks pregnant. I had a rough first half pregancy with bed rest due to heavy bleeding. But 7 months later delivered a large, healthy boy. Just because I had him so quick didn't mean I wasn't grieving for the one I lost. Give your body time to heal & ask your doctor what is best. I wish you the best of luck.

I also had a miscarriage and D & C at around 8 weeks, and my husband and I were devastated. I am so sorry for your loss. The D & C was no big deal, and I think made the physical healing quicker, but emotionally, I remained sad until after the birth of my middle son. I actually wasn't sure I wanted to try again, and the doctor had wanted me to wait for 3 cycles, but 3 cycles came very quickly for me, in less than 2 months, and this made me feel more ready to try again and I got pregnant quickly. After my son was born, it really hit me that if I hadn't have had the miscarriage, I wouldn't have had that son, so that really helped take the sadness away.

I haven't been through this myself, but I am sorry for your loss. The procedure is D & C (dilation and curettage). You may be able to find more information on it that way. There is also the option of waiting- eventually your body will finish the miscarriage by itself if you do not want the D&C. I hope either way you are feeling better soon.

I hope you have good support around you and that you are able to talk whenever you need to. I miscarried this year, after announcing on Mother's day that we were due this Dec. 20th. I miscarried at home, but had a D & C scheduled. I just wanted everything to be done with, and did not want to carry the baby around with me. In terms of emotional healing, I think I'm hanging on longer than most. This last pregnancy was a surprise for us, but it made me want more. It's been 5 months and there are still tinges of sorrow. As the due date approaches I'm a little more sad, but ok with how things turned out.

First I would like to say I am sorry for your loss. I had a miscarrige about 5 years ago, if there is anything fortunate about the situation, I didn't have to have a D&C. I am an RN though and am familiar with the procedure. It is a relatively quick outpatient procedure and the pain after is similiar to menstraul cramps. After my miscarriage my doctor said to wait until I have a regular period and we could start trying again. I just wasn't emotionally ready to try again right away, we waited about year and we have a beautiful 3 year old girl. The loss was very difficult for me. It took me several months to feel "normal" again. I miscarried on Mother's Day so although the pain is gone I still think about it often around that time of year. Good luck and with time your pain will lessen.

Hi Jennifer-
I too am sorry for your loss. I had two miscarriages back to back, resulting in 2 D & C's as my body did not expel the pregnancies either. My Dr. too told me I could wait, that eventually my body would do what it needed to do. However, for me, I didn't want to wait....it felt "weird" to me. So I opted for the D & C and I am glad I did. It is very simple, virtually painless and lets you emotionally move on. My Dr. told me on both of them to have 3 periods and then start trying again, my sister had one and her Dr. told her 1 period. I think a couple of months is a safe bet. As far as how long it took to get over the miscarriage....for me...the first one I accepted. God's will kind of thing. I have a cousin with a rare form of Lukemia and a cousin who has a child born with special needs from a rare disorder. So for me I looked at it like God knew. The second one I was mad, because I was like "why me".....however I have since had a gorgeous baby girl who is the absolute light in our eyes and now I look back on the miscarriages like...."Oh, yeah....THIS is why it happened, because THIS is who God wanted to be our child. Try to stay optimistic, I know loss is hard, but before long I hope you can see it as a bump in the road :) Good Luck!!

I understand what you are going through. I had a miscarriage in 2000 at 11 weeks. I had to have an immediate DNC at 2 a.m. Needless to say, I didn't have much time to think about it. I opted for the spinal sedation instead of an epidural. I was up and moving about an hour or two after the surgery. I conceived a month later and had a very healthy baby. I have since had a 3rd child. Even though I have 3 beautiful girls I would never trade, I still become sad. I lost my baby on new years day. That time of year if not very easy for me still. I look at my children and know that there was a medical reason the baby didn't make it. I hadn't done anything wrong. Praying has helped some, but it still hits me from time to time.

Good luck and God bless!
B.

Hi Jennifer -

I'm so sorry I haven't posted back sooner - no need to go into why.

Anyway - I miscarried at 10 weeks - however did not find out until 12 weeks...and I also did not expel the baby. The procedure was fine...I had no problems...I'm hoping by now you have had it and had the same experience of no problems. Healing went alright too. Again - like pregnancy, every one is different. I believe I went to a wedding later in the week - took it real slow and didn't exert myself...but was on my feet.

I still think about the miscarriage to this day. We named our baby and I have a tattoo on my leg in rememberence. If you are feeling bad because you are feeling you did something wrong, don't - you did nothing wrong. Healing takes time, and different things will help you heal. I believe we continue to heal the rest of our lives.

They say to try not to conceive until after you have one normal menstrual cycle. I didn't even want to have sex before then - I didn't want to have sex and not by trying. It was my emotional problem. But then we started right after - it took us a while, but we were watching a calendar or anything. Now we have a beautiful, healthy baby girl!

Good luck-

I am sorry about your loss :( I had a d&c my second pregnancy @ 13 weeks. I went in for my 12 week appointment and didn't get to hear the heartbeat. My previous appointment, I saw the heartbeat, but soon after that I woke up one morning and didn't feel pregnant anymore. It was sureal when the doctor couldn't find the heartbeat, I told her I had already known...
Anyways, 2 days later I was scheduled for the d&c. The night before nature began to take its course, but the doctor still wanted me to do the d&c. Everything went well. I hardly bleed afterwards and had no cramping. I was able to function as a mother to a 1 yr. old at the time, though I was emotional. I cried my self to sleep for a few nights. My saving grace, was that I knew this was in Gods hands. We started to try for another baby 2 months later and became pregnant with my daughter 6 months later :) She is now 13 months old. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Best of luck :)

Sorry to hear about your lose.
I just had a D&C done sept 19th. I was 13 weeks 3 days along. For me I went in to the ER with passing huge (grapefruit size) bloodclots, but no tissue. So I had to have the surgery. I was already in a gown, they wheeled me on a cart to pre-operation room, I got my IV there, then I got wheeled into the OR, I didn't have gas to knock me out they gave me medication through my IV-it stings!- but your out before you can really complain. They only did the prep once I was out (you can ask for this if you want). I woke up about an hour later in the post-op room. I felt fine. I had very mild cramping (much less then what I went in for). They made sure I peed and then sent me home with my husband. I wore one regular pad post procedure then I switched to panty liners for the next couple days. I wasn't allowed to swim/have sex/use tampon for two weeks (NOTHING up there). After two weeks I had my check up and was given a clean bill of health. I was told to wait to get my period before starting to get pregnant again (which makes sense because even though your no longer pregnant your body needs to excrete the pregnancy hormones in your blood-so you can't get pregnant if your body already thinks it is). It took me 3 weeks to get my period and then we started trying again. I just found out I'm 5 weeks pregnant this last monday, so we got pregnant our first cycle back to trying.
I'm a nurse and choose to view the whole thing as a medical issue and not the lose of a child (NOT FOR EVERYONE!). So I just got back on the horse and continued.
Some doctors will tell patients to wait up to 6 months, just to be warned. The AVERAGE I hear doctors tell women is 1-3 months--depends how much they need to do during the surgery and what they think you body will need to form a good/safe lining for the next time. If you have more question feel free to send me a message-I was a L&D nurse and a surgical nurse so I can give you more details if you like.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my son at 17 weeks and ended up having a d&c. It is a short out patient surgery and some people experience bleeding and cramping afterwards, I had neither though. I did get hit with bad depression because it did feel like a part of me was missing all of a sudden. I'd love to say I stopped feeling bad about the miscarriage but he would have just turned 2 and every time his due date or date of d&c roll around I have a very hard time but it may vary because I already was feeling him kick and knew he was a boy.

You are in our prayers.

I had a miscarriage and D&C at 7 weeks with my first pregnancy. It was heart wrenching, and I'm sorry for what you're going through. My obgyn advised me to wait one menstrual cycle before trying again, and that getting pregnant again was the best thing to do emotionally. I got my period shortly after the D&C, and got pregnant immediately the next month. It WAS the best thing I could do, and I had a healthy, easy pregnancy and a beautiful baby girl who's now 7 and another 5 year old to boot. And I was an older mom - had the first at 39, the second at 41.

J.