Seeking Advice from Other Moms - Buffalo Grove, IL

Updated on February 02, 2009
K.S. asks from Lincolnshire, IL
7 answers

Hi moms! Just had a quick question and wanted some opinions from other moms. I run a daycare in my home. Two days a week, I watch too many children to put in my car to pick my daughter up from school. My mom is willing to pick her up one day a week. I posted an add on craigslist to try to find another mom from my daughter's school to bring her home the day I can not pick her up. A local babysitter that lives in the town I live in responded. She said that she babysits and could bring her home for me once a week. She gave me a price I think is fair. So, she is coming over this week so we can meet. I am feeling a bit nervous about having a stranger drive my child home from school. I do not have any really good mom friends at my daughter's school. I feel it is a lot to ask someone to bring her home every week, when I can't return the favor. Do you think I am being crazy?? Would you hire someone after meeting them once to drive your child home. It is about a four minute car ride.

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S.D.

answers from Chicago on

I would NEVER!!!!!! Decrease the amount of kids in your daycare before you subject your child to this situation. If you need the money, too bad. Don't put a $$$ amount on the safety of your child.

What good is a copy of her license & insurance card? That doesn't prove she's sane.

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M.O.

answers from Chicago on

Karen,

I understand your apprehension. But think about it, many of us have left our children with a "sitter" when only meeting them once, so why not a pick up person? I get that you are letting someone drive your daughter around, not just sit in the house, but still...

I agree, get a copy of her license and insurance card. Ask her if she's ever been in accidents/had tickets. Check her references and perhaps to a background check. Also, be clear, maybe in writing, what your expectations and her pay rate will be. As in, is it per pick up? Is she allowed to have friends in the car when she's working for you? Make sure your daughter sits in the back seat. Make sure she gets out of the car to get your daughter, so she isn't wandering aimlessly looking for the woman/girl.

Obviously you get the idea.

I think the expectations in writing is as important as the background check. Especially because she is going to be driving and unsupervised with your child. This may help you and your DH feel more comfortable too.

I hope this helps!

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J.R.

answers from Chicago on

Keep in mind that if she were riding a school bus, the bus driver is a stranger you trust. The only difference is you trust the school knows or has screened the driver in some way. When you meet the person, ask to check their drivers license to be sure it is valid. Be sure she has a cell phone number you can reach her at. Ask her for two or three references, and check them out. Feel free to express your concerns. The more honest you are up front will give you both a chance to start on good terms. The other advice I have is to teach your daughter what to do if she is ever uncomfortable. We tend to teach (particularly our daughters) not to listen to our inner voices. It is the worse thing we can do. I taught 4 yr old's in pre-school for many years, and I always had a unit on what to do if you are uncomfortable, the difference between good touches, and bad touches, good secrets and bad secrets (that one is the most important one). My guess is she would be perfectly safe and you have done a good job of finding a solution that is workable for all. But even if you do all the right things to protect your children every day of there life, there are no guarantees, it always seems like those people who were the "best neighbors", "teachers, or scout leaders" that you hear about on the news, people no one would suspect..... you know what I mean. So rather than fretting the unknown, work with what you can control and what you do know, and train your child well. I think you'll be fine.

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E.F.

answers from Chicago on

I would call the employer of the babysitter to abysitter. Talk to her and see how she feels about her and what other things she can tell you. If you are paying the sitter never feel bad. She is your employee, she isn't doing you a favor.

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J.M.

answers from Chicago on

I was in the same situation last year. I actually hired someone to help out in my home daycare on the days that my son had to be picked up from preschool. It was nice to have a helping hand on those days and it was nice to feel like I was staying involved as a parent. Maybe the babysitter would like to help you out at home instead. Just a thought!
Also I would feel more comfortable and I am sure your child would too if you found someone in her class to bring her home from school. You could even offer to pay that parent.

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S.Q.

answers from Chicago on

I wouldn't worry about not being able to return the favor to another parent from your daughter's school. I carpooled for several working moms several days a week, and did it just to help them out since I was at the school anyway. The more the merrier. (Now, I am the working mom and others help me when I am in a pickle like late from work!) You could post a notice on the bulletin board at school explaining your situation, or you could even offer a small payment if that makes you feel more comfortable. But I would expect at least one parent would want to help out. That parent is driving their child anyway, so what is one more for a four minute car ride? However, you would need a back-up plan if that person's child is home sick from school.

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A.S.

answers from Chicago on

I agree with the other posts. Just make sure to get a copy of her driver's license, make sure she has valid insurance, and have contact info and references. To be on the safe side, you can also have a background check done for $30 or so. It's a worthwhile investment. But really, I think if you just trust your M. instincts, you'll be able to tell if something is wrong. I also think trying to look at options available at the school might be a better idea. Check out the PTA or PTO or other parent organizations. There may be someone near by who would be happy to do it for a little to no fee.

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