My son is 18 months old and I am seeking a good book on how to handle discipline/parenting issues with him. I have already heard of 'Happiest Toddler on the Block' but was wondering if there are any other good books on this topic. I don't want to be too 'strict' of a parent but I don't want to be a 'pushover' either. My son has really started to test his limits lately! Thanks in advance for your help.
123 Magic by Phelan
A great non-threatening, simple, easy method.
A quick read in paperback.
Lots of elementary schools use this method as well.
Good luck!
We love anything by John Rosemond. Parent Power is my favorite. It is more of an old fashioned/common sense way of parenting.
Hi,
the one book that has become my "bible" on parenting is :
"DISCIPLINE WITHOUT DISTRESS" BY JUDY ARNALL
You can read some chapters of it on line. It really changed the way I handle my parenting methods and it changed for the better my relationship with my 3 year old son. It is all about positive discipline which I have always believed in but never been quite sure how to make it work for my situation. I carry it with me just to go back to some paragraphs and stop myself of loosing my patience with my little one when he's testing my limits. I am so grateful for this book , give it a try you can get it for only 10 bucks or so form amazon.
Hope this helps
I am a big believer in the Love and Logic books. I recommend you read the original book called something like Love and Logic - how to raise responsible kids and then read the Love and Logic for 1 to 6 year olds.
The books give you some great hands-on methods on how to get your kids to think for themselves so you don't have to tell them what to do and what not to do all the time.
Our 27 months old twins are already getting the jist and we are "fighting" much less in our family now.
M.
I just started reading Have A New Kid By Friday by Dr. Kevin Leman. It's supposed to be good.
Not sure if it is still in print - but I loved Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka - you could probably find through Amazon.
It includes all ages.
It is written to help you stay in a positive mind set.
Hi J.,
I love the Positive Discipline series (Jane Nelson). There is one for ages 1-3, for toddlers, and for preschoolers. Sounds similar to Love and Logic mentioned below. The author helps keep the focus on setting boundries in a positive way that builds self esteem and a healthy sense of responsibility (healthy means in a way the child can really feel proud of and good about). Also, "Raising Your Spirited Child" and/or "Kids, Parents and Power Struggles" (Kurcinka).
It's really hard to break away from the reward and punishment style of raising kids that a lot of us were probably raised with, but it's brave too! I think if we want to raise resilient, thinking children, parents need to move away from the controlling methods (in my view including the 1,2,3 Magic method). It takes time to find a discipline style that you're comfortable with and one that works well for your child.
All the best!
C.
I love John Rosemond's Six-Point Plan for Raising Happy, Healthy Children. Fabulous advice!
After doing a lot of research, we just bought "Unconditional parenting" which I have started to read and I like in theory, although I haven't gotten to the practice part yet. Like most of these, it is a little bit absolute it its philosophy, but I am hoping that some of the practices are helpful. Thought I would pass it along because we have gone other routes and have struggled with creating peace in the house (we have two little toddlers and a baby).
Good luck!
Try '1-2-3 Magic'. It's a great system used in some preschools and schools. It can expand and grow with the child.
1 - 2 - 3 MAGIC.
Check with a local elementary school, I get notices about it a couple times a year for seminars held at the school.
I have 4, it worked with them all!! I'm currently teaching it to my 2 1/2 year old, and still working with my 8 year old.
My mother used to count to 5, and when/if she got to 5 it was bad.
I have learned a bit more patience with my kids than what she had for me and my older siblings.
good luck
Dr Sears has a discipline book, I highly recommend any of his books.
Dr Sears' The Discipline Book is awesome.
I think there's no one right way or wrong way - you take little things from what people say or from books and you modify it to fit you...
What I find works good is if my kids throw things or don't pick it up or don't share - the toy/things go right into timeout. Then more toys go into timeout and then there's nothing left for them to play with. Then they get miserable. Then they learn... :) Sometimes simplifying things help.
Once my daughter refused to get dressed. So, I went ahead and left her diaper on, proceeded to get ready and put her in the car seat with only a diaper on (it was winter, in the garage, it was COLD!). She started hollering (haha) I asked if she wanted to get dressed and she did - no problems ever since...
Understand that their language is not fully developed so try what works - you know your kids best!! :)
The Secret of Parenting, Anthony Wolf
Great view into how to respond to an actual issue vs. a kid's efforts to gain attention. A big and important distinction. The first few chapters are great. It has a bit of a "love and logic" approach too.
My husband likes New kid by Friday - from our discussions, I think the two are similar.
Good luck.
I love 1,2,3 Magic. I play the video during workshops. You will also need another book because you can't count all the time. Books by Dr. Brazelton are very good, too.
I have been teaching Parenting Classes for years. I would like to rec that whatever discipline techniques you choose -be consistent with them! If you have a very challenging child, read The Spirited Child...
Age 3 is usually the rough one (during the younger yrs). Being firm, yet loving during this period is important.
Kristen
I'd recommend 'The Continuum Concept' by Jane Leidler and any book by William Sears. Good luck on discipline, enjoy your motherhood :)
I love The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting by Lawrence Steinberg, Ph.D. Steinberg basically distills decades of parenting research (by many parenting experts) into a parenting book into 10 rules. The chapter on discipline is especially good. It really gave me an "ah ha" moment.
Hi, J.!
I've worked as a nursery school teacher for many years, and the first book that I recommend regarding discipline is called Beyond the Rainbow Bridge by Barbara Patterson. It's very loving and warm, and takes the child's developmental stages into consideration. Best of luck on your parenting path!
-J. B.
