MB,
I think there are some "searches" you can do to check out tips on line as many people want to check for themselves.
A couple of things you can do are:
1) Hire a handyman or other professional to check the house out for you. You can explain the problem and have a list of questions before you have someone to come out to see who is best for the job. Then ensure you want a list of recommended "fixes" in order of priority. You can also ask them for a estimate to fix each job. Then present this to your husband. That might motivate him to get moving on this or YOU can hire someone to do it.
2) Go around your house and check window and door seams, both the top and bottom and the edges where the trim meets the walls. Perhaps these are "drafting" due to improper installation or simply not enough insulation around them.
3) Check your fireplaces. If you don't have them cleaned/checked regularly you could be losing a lot of heat from them. If the flue isn't closing properly, warm air will simply escape out of them.
4) Have someone check your insulation levels in your attic. Adding supplemental insulation will prevent "normal" heat loss through the roof.
5) Go around your house and check the vents. By simply opening/closing/adjusting the ones in the rooms you use the most (open) or least (closing) and slightly closing the ones upstairs, you may be able to save on your heating bill. That way the rooms you use the most are well heated, and vice versa. Also, since the heat rises, you don't have to have the vents fully open on the top floor.
6) Use your washer, dryer, dishwasher, oven, etc during the daytime. These all produce heat/steam that helps keep your house warm and moist in these cold winters. So get baking! Not only will your family enjoy a hot meal, but it will get some extra heat in the house (and the room your eating in!).
I hope these suggestions help. Whenever my husband tells me he think's I'm crazy, I go and get several (free) estimates for the work. I try to be very general to the repair men about the "problem" to get a good feel for what they think by the estimate they submit. This has really cut down on the arguing and fighting with my DH because now I have "proof" that work needs to be done, and $$$ estimates of what it will cost. Usually it takes a week for him to get over the "sticker shock." Then I approach the discussion again. I also tell him, "Look, I understand you're busy and can't get to this or don't want to do this job. Why don't we just hire this job out and get it taken care of." If he doesn't agree to getting the work done, I ask HIM to commit to a date that it will get done by (no pressure), and I POST IT on the estimate. If that date comes and goes, then I have HIS OWN PROMISE to follow-up on. Again, no guilt, more along the lines of, "You promised to do this. It's not done. Can we PULLLEEZZZ now hire someone to fix it already." It's amazing how well this has worked and cut down on our fights, and my "nagging".
Let me know what happens! Good luck.