Second C-section and I Am Terrified

I can understand completely. I have had both of my children c section. The first time was torture. Not only would the doctors and nurses not listen to me, they kept telling me that I was too young to understand that I just needed to calm down, when I was trying to tell them that something was wrong. Because they did not listen to me, they almost killed me and my son. Both of our heart rates dropped to almost nothing and my poor husband was at the realization that he might of had to decide who to save. Thank the dear Lord above, he brought us both threw it, but I was still scared to death when I found out not 4 months later that I was expecting again,because all of the fear was still in my mind. As the months went by the fear stayed with me because I knew I had to go c section again because my body couldn't do it naturally. When the time came and I had my daughter, it was like a walk in the park. 3 days after having her I was home vacumming my floor. Trust me when I tell you sweetie that the second time is easier. I don't know if it is because you prepare yourself for it or you know what to tell the doc right before the surgery but it is so much easier and recovery is so much faster. Let them know what happened before and what your fears are and that helps too because it is fresh in their minds also and they look out better for you.
If you need more help my email is ____@____.com. I will be glad to help ease your mind in any way I can.

I definitely feel your pain! I delivered my first 2 children vaginally and then had an emergency c-section with my 3rd after his vitals started going down in between contractions. I never thought I would have to have a c-section after having 2 vaginally! It was the scariest experience of my life. It ended up that he had his cord wrapped around his neck 4 times and was basically hanging himself on it every time I had a contraction. I can remember laying on the table shaking so hard and scared out of my mind wondering what was happening to my body! Then for the recovery. He was in the NICU and I was nursing and having to go clear across the hospital every couple of hours to nurse him. At first in a wheelchair and then attempting to walk (the first time I tried to stand up out of my bed I nearly passed out because of the pain). Anyways, I thought for sure I would be able to have my 4th VBAC. Because of various circumstances I ended up having a planned c-section instead. It was a totally different experience. The difference between the emergency and the planned is that your body hasn't been through a bunch of trauma before they cut you open. I was not as scared and in fact was able to talk and joke with the doctors and anesthesiologist through the whole procedure (in your case I would definitely ask for a different anesthesiologist). I was able to be up and walking the following day and felt like I was getting around normal by a week. You will definitely not have the same experience as you did with the emergency c-section. Just don't forget that the staff is there to take care of you and if you are uncomfortable with the way someone is treating you it is your RIGHT to ask for a replacement. Good luck and relax so you can have a better experience this time!

C.,
I'm so sorry to hear about your experience. It seems to me that the anesthesiologist was not only extremely rude but highly unprofessional. If you haven't done so I would suggest you talk about it with your doctor... I once had a bad experience with a radiologist and when my doctor found out she was very determined to provide feedback to the radiology group. She felt it was her responsibility to make sure her patients got treated with dignity and respect. Maybe your doctor can do the same and support you in your request for a different anesthesiologist. Also, maybe having a midwife or doula could help you as well. They can be very good at looking after you and they can be there as well as your husband. Lastly, and not to sound like a broken record, but I like the other suggestions you have gotten about looking into VBAC. My best friend, too never progressed enough to deliver her first child vaginally and had a C-section, somehow her body had no problem going into labor and delivery with her second, so maybe it could be something to consider.
Again, I'm so sorry about your past experience. I wish you the best.

Maybe you should put together a birth plan and discuss it with your doctor. Outline on it which type of anesthesia you want, who you want in the OR with you, etc. I've heard that birth plans are usually taken *very* seriously.

I just had a 2nd c-section...I delivered at Swedish Medical Center both times and they were great. The anesthesiologist even called me the night before to discuss any concerns, health issues, etc. Then he came in to introduce himself before the surgery. Since yours is scheduled this time, you could request that they do that as well to put your mind at ease.

FWIW, I had a spinal both times. My recovery was longer after the first one (I had HELLP so was on some nasty meds for that)... I was up & walking around the next day this time and I felt pretty much back to normal after about 2 1/2 weeks. I've never had an epidural so I can't compare them, but I didn't think the spinal was so bad.

The thing I'm curious about is where was your doctor while this anesthesiologist was abusing you???

I'm sure things will be MUCH different this time. You'll be so much more prepared for the whole thing, and you'll certainly know what to look out for! Best of luck!
O.

I know exactly what you went through. With my 1st son, I had to have an emergency c-section. I was in labor for 36 hours and had only dialated to a 7, and my contractions were not getting stronger. I had a horrible doctor who kept trying to get me to deliver vaginally because she had done enough c-sections that day. It got to the point that they had to call code blue for my son, but he had no heart rate and my blood pressure was dropping. They almost didn't let my husband into the operating room because of the emergency. I, too let pain after my son was born. So when I got pregnant with my second son and had decided to have a planned c-section that was one thing I was really scarred about. When I spoke with the anesthelogist before my surgery he had told me that that is very common with epidurals and since I was a spinal, I would not have that problem. Let me tell you, my second c-section was so much better. I knew what to expect and the recovery was easier too. Are you delivering at the same hospital? I delivered at Sky Ridge, if you would like I can find out the name of the anesthelogist that I had and give you his name. He was a wonderful guy. He talked to me the entire time and told me what was going on. After my son was born and took pictures of me and my husband and I was able to hold him too.

I'm sorry you had to do that. Talk with your doc and ask to meet the anesthesiologist before the surgery. My only was a C-section and I had a spinal (which was great) but I remember the feeling that they didn't put my guts back exactly the way they were before (my doc said that there is no way to get them back exactly) anyways it was a wierd feeling and a long recovery! However the experience was not at all that way. I have faith this one will be better. Remember you are in control and it is ok to say STOP & LISTEN! If they don't, continue to protest until you are heard. They work for you, not the other way around.

I too had C-section with both my boys. First was emergency and went well. Second went very smooth since we already chose c-section to avoid a rupture my first surgeun was trained to do single stitch and my new doctor felt it was much safer to not risk me rupturing while pushing.
I would highly recommend talking to your doctor and making sure you get a new anethesiologist. If you could ask your doctors advise for their recommendations. I have a nurse friend that works in Special care nursery and she is always in the surgery assisting. Maybe you could call the special care nursery at your hospital and explain your fears and see if any of the nurses have some recommendations for doctors to work with. If your experience was that bad maybe you should report this to the hospital medical board to follow up on the doctor.
I will be praying for you. God bless

I am questioning as well as to why you would have another c-section. My first child was emergency c-section, luckily everything went well. I do however understand the fear of the whole process. However, I chose to go VBAC with my daughter, and it was the best decision I could have made. I tried drug free for about 5 hours, but ended up needing help because she was head down and ready to go, but my body wasn't. Nonetheless I remember every part of that delivery, and especially after the drugs, I loved it. As a mother it is hard to say I loved the birth of my second child better than the first, but I really did because I was able to participate. With the c-section, as you said, you feel helpless. So, if there is no medical reason for the c-section, I vote you go for the VBAC. It really is an amazing experience that you will never forget.

Hello C.,
It's true the second c-section is a lot better. If you can go V-bac then it may be an option. If you need to have another c-section, I agree with the other moms about asking for another anesthesiologist. Let your concerns be known to your doctor now. I had a second c-section and it's normal to feel scared especially after what you have gone through. They do only let one person in the OR with you that's just how it is.
You can ask them to give you something to relax you right before the surgery. It does help to ease the nerve. However, you will feel a bit drowsy. It wears out when it's time to see your new bundle of joy. It sounds like maybe you needed more meds. You shouldn't feel pain, a little pressure. Also, ask the nurse to put your catheter on when you have your spinal block so you won't feel it. Let them know that you are nervous and tense. Your anesthesiologist should go over these things before that way you feel comfortable. Remember it's for the baby.
Good luck to you.

That sounds HORRIBLE! I have not had a c-section, I just wanted to respond because I felt so bad after reading your story! Is there a chance you could try a vaginal birth this time, and only go with a c-section if absolutely necessary? And could you go to a different hospital or at least request a different anethesiologist? At least this time around, you know what the "worst case scenario" is and can do whatever possible to avoid it!! I wish you all the best with the birth of your baby!

C.,
I am so sorry that you had that experience. I would recommend visiting ICAN's website, http://www.ican-online.org/

You can have a different experience, it can be a wonderful, peaceful, empowering birth of a healthy, vibrant child. You have to be willing to take responsibilty for your birth, this is YOUR birth, not the OB's, nurses or anyone elses. I would encourage you to visit ICAN's website, talk to other Mom's who have had similar experiences (Not to dwell on bad though, you need positive influences- I can put you in touch with some great women, if you'd like), and really deal with these feelings and fears- it is important not to have any fear- that is the first complication to a gentle birth.

I do not have first-hand experience with c-sections or harsh treatment like you recieved, but I do have 2 ears that are open to hear and heart that wants all Mothers to have wonderful births- feel free to contact me if you would like to talk.

Good luck, I would love to know what you think of the website.
H. Gaitten
www.naturalchoices4baby.com

C.,

It sounds like your cesarean was traumatic and I can understand how you would feel terrified to experience that again. I am so sorry to hear you were treated like that.

My first thoughts upon reading this were wondering how you made the decision to have a cesarean this time--that must have been a difficult choice to make. It sounds like you badly wanted a vaginal birth the first time around. Did you consider vaginal birth this time? Avoiding the anesthesiologist for your upcoming birth might help alleviate some of the fear and anger you felt toward the anesthesiologist last time.

Will you be going to the same hospital/relying upon the same care provider that you did for the first birth? Have you shared your concerns with your doctor or midwife? What is his or her response?

If you haven't already, I would suggest meeting with a therapist to heal as much as you can before your daughter is born. You deserve to feel secure and loved (let alone have your wishes respected) throughout the process of giving birth.

The Denver ICAN (International Cesarean Awareness Network) chapter has been helpful to myself and many of the women I know. http://www.icanofcolorado.org/ See what information they can share.

I wish you the best!

Is there any reason you could not have a VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Ceserean)? If you don't have a medical reason preventing it, you could investigate this possibility. Women do this often, but you don't often hear about it. That would be the first thing I would look into. If you want to do so, but your doctor doesn't support your choice, find a doctor (and/or midwife) who does.

I also had a c-section 2 yrs ago. But my daughter was breech so we scheduled it. I was able to have a spinal block w mine and I didn't feel anything. I am so sorry that your experience didn't go liked you planned and you were pain! My mom wanted to be in the operating room too (incase my husband passed out because he hates blood), but she couldn't be in there either. The hospital said they only let 1 person in the operating room.

I really believe that you should not let your past experience affect you (I know that is extremely hard to do so!) But having a planned c-section is completely different than having one at the last minute. This next c-section will be on "your terms" as much as it can be! YOU are in control. They will go through all the steps w you in advance, and you will be more alert. Hope this helps!

Talk to your Dr. Make sure you have a different anethesiologist and talk to them prior to the surgery. Tell them what happened and if they are unconcerned ask for a different one! Until you find one that listens. It is your right to know what is happening to you.

This delivery should be easier because you won't be exhusted from labor. You are also mentally prepared and know what is going to happen.

Good Luck,
C. B

I had a c-section too. I wasn't progressing and had already got the epidural so by the time they were ready to do the c-section I was gaining feeling back. They just touched my stomach and i was was like "um I can feel that". So they then tried to give me a spinal block but they couldn't get it in the right spot. After being stuck with the needle 6 times they decided to put me out completely! It was really sad because i didn't know when my daughter was born and no one could be in there with me. Not even my husband. So i know how you feel about being scared to have another c-section. You have to remember that the good thing about having a c-section this time is that it is all scheduled. So nothing will be rushed and your body won't have to go through all the stress of hours of labor before going into surgery. The doc's will make sure you are good and numb before they do it this time. I know that c-sections suck but I have heard that the second time around is so much easier than the first. Good luck.

My first c-section was due to failure to progress and was extremely hard. I had a spinal block and recovery was horrible. My second one was sue to not being allowed to do a VBAC and I did just an epideral. I preferred it by far. Having it just before the surgery, you typically don't feel anything. My doctor now is actually considering letting me try for a VBAC if all looks good. If you're a candidate, a VBAC is a better way to go for lots of reasons. It does come with it's own risks, but so does major surgery. I wish I could have done a VBAC. You are more aware of things with an epideral, so if you want to be a bit fuzzy on memory, etc., a spinal block might be better. If I do a c-section this time, I will definitely be doing an epidural due to the easier recovery. What ever you do, I hope it all goes well.