Scared About Delivering 2Nd Baby(bc of Baby's Size)

My ultrasound with my son said he would be around 9 1/2 lbs. He was 8 lbs 6 oz. Don't trust the ultrasound to make that determination. It's not exact by any means.

Try again for a vaginal delivery. May be they may be able to try some different things knowing the sixe of child number two. May be they can have you deliver early since they know the baby is also going to be big. I would ask the doctor about that. Tell him if the baby is big can we take him early because of the issues last time or will you do a c section? remember,you will heal quicker from a vaginal delivery vs. a csection. Good luck

Not all births are the same... and cesareans are MAJOR abdominal surgeries with some very real complications - some are permanent.

I think you should confront your OB about using more gravity and woman friendly techniques for birthing... walking around, allowed to sway, rock and sit on the edge of the bed. Allow you to squat, be on your hands and knees, get into a deep tub or warm shower. Also perineal support and oiling are big deals too!!

You had a bad experience in a hospital with an OB and did not even consider the MANY other better options you have available to you? Midwives - both at birthing centers and at OB offices would have been a better choice for you. At least the Midwives that work in the hospitals ATTEMPT to be more woman friendly and care more about your birth than most OBs will.

I bet your OB doesn't even know what perineal support is!

I'm having a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) at home with a Midwife. After my 1st traumatic experience in the hospital with OBs there was NO WAY I'd even consider going back to them! My first baby was only 7lb 11oz... this one I"m expecting to be at LEAST 9lbs. With my Midwife, I know the chances of having tearing is low.

I'm also about a week away from the birth.

I think you'll have a MUCH easier delivery with your 2nd. If you are scared and want to do a c-section, I can totally understand that though!
For me (and also my sister) my first baby was a long labor... pushing for 2 1/2 hours and a 4th degree tear but my 2nd was quick... 2 pushes and she was out. Very little tearing!
Good luck!

Second experience can be very different than the first. I had to push two hours with our oldest and ended up with a big baby in the NICU and very painful complications afterward. Second child popped out with maybe 10 pushes and she was a big (8 lbs. 15 oz.) face-first baby. You just never know.

I would tell the delivering OB your concerns and mention you're completely fine with a c-section if things look like they're getting complicated.

I agree. Talk to your OB. Your body is different now that you have already had a child and I had very different experiences with both of my children. Set up a game plan but have options and keep an open mind.

My friend had a similar issue, first labor about 40 hours (she insisted on doing it naturally) and the second one was about 2 hours. In my case, both ultrasounds were way off on weight both were 1 1/2 to 2 lbs lighter than predicted. Hope this helps, I know you are really scared, I will send some prayers your way.

Both of my babies were about 8 lbs at delivery, I delivered them both vaginally and I'm a rather small woman as well. The first delivery was 20 + hours with over 2 hours of pushing and very difficult. For me, delivering the second baby was so much faster. I was in about 5 hours of labor and pushed for maybe 10 min., everything is more stretched out. It's like the first baby paves the way.:) That was my experience but definitely talk to your doctor about your fears, that's what I did and it seemed to relax me because I really trusted my OB. Best of luck and I'm sure you will be fine!

I want to second or third the advice of not the u/s on size. i have had more than one friend get upset and scared of big babies because the u/s estimated 8 lbs or more. One was to the point of tears after and asking me about my own c-section(not size related). I kept saying wait and see. Every time without fail the u/s was wrong. The one friend that was in tears wound up having a barely 6 lb girl. She was so upset at her dr for scaring her that she changed drs after that.

Talk to your ob about your fears! However, with baby #2 things are stretched out more in the delivery dept. And those measurements are not always exact. They can be off by a pound!

Talk to your OB because they may not be willing to just do a c-section because you said so, but then again they may not have an issue with it. My first was vaginal, I didn't have tearing or all of the other issues you did afterwards, but he did weigh 9lb 3oz & I was in labor for 17 hours. My 2nd was a c-section though totally unrelated to size, they did tell me she would be almost as big as her brother & she weighed 6lb 12oz.

Don't freak yourself out. You dealt with it once, you can do it again if you need to. Your body will adapt much quicker than it did the first time.

demand the ob reconsider regarding your fears. he and the insurance company may have one opinion, but your experience tells you something else. You should not go into labor with these fears. Look that doctor dead in the eye and strongly emphasize your feelings. I can't believe you came this close to deliver before discussing it with your doctor. You are the patient and you need to have your feelings heard!

Hi, MOS:
Tell your Doc what you shared with us. And ask him how thiis same
thing can be prevented. That is his job, to make your birth as pain free and
as close to natural as he can.

Just a thought.
D.

I had a similar situation with my first...4th degree episiotomy that wasn't properly stitched, suction, hemmorhaged and had low BP in the low 80's and they almost gave me an emergency c/s, but the anesthisiologist was busy. I also had a D&C with no anesthesia after the birth, it was pure hell! AND, the baby only weighed 6 pounds 10 ounces! for #2 I ended up doing a c/s because I was scared. However, my friends SWORE that #2 (weighing 8.9) would be easier, because your body has been through it and you've made a path already. My c/s recovery was so much better than what I went through. The first few days of getting around was the hardest part, but very doable! I would recommend it! I also wanted to save my female anatomy from turning into Frankencrotch (stein), I have a giant scar and didn't want to make it worse :) Congrats and good luck...

I'm a small woman also (under 5 feet) and had two c-sections because my kids were 10lbs2oz and 9lbs13oz. However, I think that you should not only speak to your doctor about your concerns but also consult with a doula. The doula may be able to tell you about what can be done to prevent tear and copious bleeding. Although a c-section is an option, I would save it as a last resort because hard as it may be, vaginal delivery is much better. C-section is major surgery and comes with a host of potential complications. Good luck with your delivery and congratulations!

.

Oh gosh, my second was SOOOO much easier than my first, I think things have been loosened up a little down there, and your muscles and body know exactly what to do. I am not saying my second birth was easy, but it was easier by about 75%. I only had a tiny tear.
Also they kept saying my baby was big, (my first was 8 lb 9) but she turned out to be only 7lbs 10, and that was mainly because I ate less during pregnancy.

My first son was 9-10. I had a fast labor and delivery of 9 hours total. No complications. My second son was 8-11, 6 hours total. He would have been over 10 pounds but he was ill in the womb and not gaining weight. In the last month he caught up to 8-11. He was harder to deliver than my first because he was shaped very different, short and wide. He had large shoulders and was like pushing out two heads in a row. No complications. Although, with my first son the doc cut me to make things easier and was sewn up fine. My second time I had a different doc and he insisted that I tear on my own, big mistake. I am so against that. Made things so much harder on me. I mean, if you cut a piece of cloth or tear a piece of cloth, which one is easier to sew together?

My triplets were obviously a c-section out of necessity. You do not want a c-section unless it is medically necessary for both and the baby. Remember, every birth is different. We don't know what all the circumstances were with your first pregnancy. I can't tell you not to worry because you will but be aware that things will be different. Knowing ahead of time how things work does help give you a voice but no doctor will give you a c-section just because you want one. There has to be a need. That's major surgery.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

I agree - talk it through with your doctor. I had a C-section with my first because he was big and face up (after 3.5 hours of pushing). And they've agreed to do a late ultrasound to check on size and decide from there whether I do VBAC or C. They are completely fine with whatever I decide and just want to give me as much information as possible to make a decision I'm comfortable with. If your dr doesn't consider your concerns, I would change doctors!

My daughter had most of the same problems you had with the birth of your first daugher. The long labor .Her tear was so bad it even reopened after 5 weeks. She did not hemmmorhage. Her baby was 8 lbs, 14 oz. With her second son the ultrasound showed he was a large baby also. She called me at 6:30 pm that she thought she might be going to the hospital. She arrived there and was admitted at 8 pm. At 12:05 am her son was born. None of the problems she had with the first delivery and she had a short labor. I can tell you she was worried also after her first delivery. Her second son was 8lbs. 4oz. but the doctors had thought he would be as large or larger than her first son. Each delivery is different. Hopefully you will let us know how you make out. My daughter was thinking of the c-section option also.

csection if thats helps you feel better

I can see how you can be nervous. My daughter was 8lbs 14oz and she was face up and it was a long labor...I didn't have problems like you did and I am only 5'4". My second I was induced (i had gestational diabetes) and my doc said in the begining I shouldn't have any problem bc my first was so big. My son was 8lbs 8oz quick and short labor was induced at 6:30 he

Do what you feel comfortable with. I feel having your child should be a great experience and comfortable one! Good Luck !!!!

Your first delivery almost mirrors mine. I too am a small person, average weight and only gained 25 lbs with each pregnancy. Ultrasound predicted a 6 lb baby for my first and over 9 lbs for my 2nd and 3rd children. Late term ultrasound can be off 1-2 lbs either way (notoriously inaccurate). My daughter was 8#13oz (this is the predicted 6 lber) and the induced labor was 30 hours of the worst pain of my life. She got stuck in the birth canal (shoulder dystocia), I had a 3rd deg tear that didn't heal well, and I hemorrhaged leaving me feeling weak and tired for a couple months. My husband and I were both traumatized. Good news is that our next 2 kids though bigger (both over 9 lbs) were a breeze to have. I had 5 hours of natural unmedicated labor with each of them, pushed less than 10 minutes, and had uncomplicated deliveries with both. With no huge tears to heal, no hemmorhage, and no shoulder dystocia, I was able to recover quickly and take on responsibilities at home much sooner. It's true, no 2 pregnancies or deliveries are alike. Bigger babies aren't always harder to have. C-sections aren't the easy way out....recovery is pretty painful and slow because it's major surgery. If you need a CS, it will likely become obvious in labor. If your baby is too big for your bone structure, it usually won't engage and descend. I wish you the very best. I know how terrified I was when I went into labor with baby #2 8 days past due date. I just knew the birthing experience would be like my first, but thankfully it wasn't because we had a "surprise" #3 baby born 20 months later. Midwife Mom

I can't give advise on experience with baby size because the size of my own were not estimate prior to birth and I had two natural deliveries, but I must say that nearly every person I've spoken to whose dr. estimated the weighs of their babies in utero were ALWAYS off - sometimes by as much as two pounds! I guess it's necessary to know in some cases, but I think it causes more fear than what it's worth. I'm also a small woman and I think any estimate over 6 pounds would have scared me!

I feel bad that your ultrasound has put fear in your mind - that's the last thing a pregnant woman needs, is to worry that she can't do it. I understand the tearing - it's awful. I tore with my first. I would suggest you try to instill yourself with confidence and arm yourself with what you'd need to manage that situation (not tearing again, I mean) - warm compresses, olive oil, deep breathing, relaxation. You can do this, momma!!

I'm a very small woman as well and my first was a lb and a half larger than what the dr. told me my body's build would be able to produce and larger than he predicted at the last appt before delivery......I gave birth vaginally and had a nasty tear that had to be redone later because it left a horribly painful skin tag when it healed. My labor was very short and painless otherwise. BUT that tear and the healing of it has left me with scar tissue that is ridiculously painful to this day (3.5 years later). I am very nervous about having another baby vaginally, but I've decided that I do not want a c-section either.

I think that your body is your body and you know what you went through the first time and you need to discuss your physical, emotional and mental standpoint with your doctor as soon as possible so that you both can make an educated decision on how to proceed. It is very normal to worry about something reoccuring and you have every right to request that your situation be handled with the best care possible.

Good luck to you and take care.

i can understand why you wouls be nervious, but there are plenty of things you can do. my last 2 babys were big at 9lb 2oz each the first 9lber was over a week early andharder than the 2nd and he was longer so you would think it would have been easyer but he came out ready for football practise lol. the 2nd was easyer and shorter and 4 days over due. what im saying is each babys is diffrent. and a ultrasound can be way off for size. but there is lots to do to help durring your birth. if possible go natural w no induction or pitt, pitt will make the contractions harder and faster. also try not to get a epidural which will keep you labouring on your back. you want to move and walk durring labour, try delivering in a upright position squatting standin or hands and knees, let gravity help you. pluss in a squatt it opens you up more to help birth bigger babys better, get a midwife or dula to go with you alot of them have great ideas to help w pain and natural delivery, but the best thing to do is trust your body you can do this your body was made for this :) congratulations on your baby