SAHM Of 1 Child Who Wants Me to Play with Her ALL the Time.

This is a great opportunity for you to teach her how to show respect for you, and the best way to do that is to show respect for her needs as well. Engage her in helping you get housework done, explaining that everyone in the family does his/her own part in contributing to the household. It may take a little while longer for you to get things done, but in the end, it will be time well spent! As for when you are on the phone, you need to tell her that you need to make an important phone call and you would appreciate her respect and patience as you do. Get her a play phone so she can "call" grandma or daddy or someone while you do this. Set the timer for 15 minutes so she knows how long she can expect you to be on the phone. Good luck.

I'm so glad you asked this question and I've enjoyed and appreciated the responses, because I experience the same thing with my same-age daughter! I struggle with guilt for needing to get things done.

Luckily she is still in a stage where she likes to be a "helper." She loves helping me put the laundry in the dryer, and sometimes I will set her up with some rice and beans and different bowls on the floor when I'm cooking so she can be with me and doing something similar but I can also focus on what I'm doing.

All four of my daughters were/are like that. Kids are programmed to abolish all outside communication- they are very self centered and believe you should be at their disposal at ALL times. In any instant where there is a chance you aren't fully paying attention JUST to them (this especially happens when mother is the only adult around at the time), then they will pull out ALL the stops to try and destroy your nerves and freedom. LOL.

What worked for me sometimes at that age is I would time out my phone calls for lunch time, nap time, favorite show is on the TV time, or bed time. I still tell people who ask when a good time to call is AFTER MY KIDS GO TO BED:) hang in there:)

My son is this way too. He is almost two and a half. I just try and play with him for 15mins here and there while I get housework done. Sometimes though, things need to be done so I'll say "Mommy has to go put the laundry in and I'll be back in a minute." Then I'll come back and play with him a little more. He is getting worse about it though. He's getting more mad when I leave now. I feel bad too because we have been trapped inside with the snow, so I have been making more of an effort to play with him more.

I was strict on mine if I was on the phone or talking to a neighbor outside or whatever. They were told to say "excuse me" first if they needed me for something BUT they were also told NOT to bother me while on the phone and there were consequences if they decided to rudely interrupt. Before you get on the phone let her know that she is to sit and play quietly until you are finished or it's time out time or whatever you use for dicipline.
They do like to "bug" when they arent getting full attention. They hear your voice talking and they just feel you should be talking to them.

My Daughter was like that.
As she got older, it became less so.
My daughter was an 'only' child for 4 years, before I had my 2nd child.
But even before then, she was better about playing on her own.

Just different personalities, per kids.
My 2nd child, is much more independent.

But it is common, that at that age, when Mommy is on the phone, they WANT your attention.

Try to include her in what you do around the house.
Have her do 'chores' or "help" you.
Tell her it is "Teamwork...." my kids, when younger (even now), like when doing things ALONG with me, even if it is cleaning the house. They get 'excited' about 'cleaning' just like Mommy.... they can 'help' even at this age. But don't expect their 'help' to be perfect... at this stage, it is just about teaching them and not it being all done perfectly. It is just an activity.... to do WITH them and they with, you.

Does she nap?
At those times, you can then have time to yourself.
At her age, she should nap. Or a tired kid, does get more fussy and clingy. At least my kids were that way, when tired.

Have things that she can do, on her own. But I know you do, as all Moms do.
Things like paper to draw on, Play-Doh, coloring books, toddler puzzles etc.

all the best,
Susan

I think we all have this problem. But some kids are more dependent than others. For me, if I can, I drop what i'm doing and spend 15 min with her then get back to my work. It is irritating and I'm also guilty of popping on a few too many cartoons when I really need to get some house work done. But they are little once and then they are gone. Remind yourself of this next time she asks.

how long and how often on the phone? she is an only child so you are her only playmate. of course she will bug you a lot :)
i have twins and they still require my attention. something about the world being centered around them maybe?
hehehe. well she's young and wants to play. as long as you're not overdoing it, put something on tv when you have/want to be on the phone. then go back to her and play with her 24/7 :)

My almost four year old son does the same thing. He LOVES hugs so we take LOTS of hug breaks.

I get the phone interuptions all the time. He tells me to "get that phone off your ear." Honestly I love it because I can get off the phone with my mom a LOT faster! LOL.

assuming she has your attention most of the time since you are a stay at home mom, you need to teach her manners. otherwise it will just get worse and a demanding 5 year old in public-yeah not so cute. At 2.5 she should be able to play independently for a few minutes. Although your world may revolve around her, the actual world doesn't. Good luck!!

Yes, she needs phone manners, but be aware that at her age it will take a while for them to sink in and work. Are these phone calls you're initiating or calls you take? Are they long conversations with friends that could wait until after her bedtime, or short "business" calls that you feel you must answer? Your mental health might be better if you make the mental health calls at times when it just won't be an issue with her.

Her wanting your attention is a problem only if you see it as such. It's great to be able to play with your child, and one of the good things about being an SAHM of one (I am too) is the ability to spend time with her and not have to rush to the next thing, get out the door constantly to this or that, etc. Are you in a play rut, maybe? Try a playgroup or a kiddie class in music or tiny tots dancing etc. at the recreation center. Find or start a moms' group with kids of the same age. She's old enough for you to start crafting with her a bit if you aren't yet. Enjoy her now!

Just to let you know, I feel your pain.

My DD is 3.5 and if she had her way, all I would do is play with her all day long. I would never have to get anything around the house, eat, sleep, take a shower, use the bathroom or heaven forbid leave the house without her or go to work (which consists of 3 overnight/weekend shifts per week, so the rest of the time I am home and I get more time at home with her then most full-time working moms - when I am at work Dad is with her). A great quote I heard from a friend is, "The best way to get your children's attention is to sit down and look comfortable."

Of course her idea of me playing with her is to sit with her on the floor or at the table while SHE is playing and not do much myself, because she wants to do it all herself (building blocks, drawing, play-doh, etc.) and not have any of Mommy's help. Or to have me help her over and over with the things she wants to do and can't do herself (like a certain 24-piece jigsaw puzzle - something that she has not quite gotten the hang of yet as far as figuring out which piece goes where based on what the picture is supposed to look like. Every time she wants to whip that thing out, I groan inside). She's gotten better with some things - like getting preoccupied with play-doh or coloring, giving me a chance to load the dishwasher or quick-clean the bathroom.

What has helped is for me to play with her and give her my undivided attention for 15 minutes or half an hour, then let her know that I need to now do XYZ. Or when she wants to do A, I tell her I will in a minute, but first I have to do B. Of course as soon as I have to take a phone call, she's all over me and I have had to remind her that she can't start talking when Mommy is talking on the phone, and I have had to give her the "1 minute" hand signal to let her know I heard her but she's going to have to wait. It's gotten easier with her now then is was a year ago - you just need to start practicing. Toddlers and preschoolers are pretty self-centered naturally and they need to start realizing that the whole world does not revolve around them.

Fortunately DD is still taking a 3 hour nap every day (in addition to 11 hours of sleep a night), so that makes it easier to get things done too. Many days the best I can do is remember that she won't be this age forever, and soon enough she'll be off the school all day, and then she will be at the age where she won't want to have anything to do with me. But it's not always easy! :)

Sadly, our little munchkins don't have a concept of what all we need to do. They live in this etherial pink bubble of la la land. If we played with them as much as they wanted us to, our houses would be on an episode of hoarders. I do the best I can, but know that I can't avoid the inevitable tantrum. Comes with the territory. Sorry I couldn't give you advice on what to do. I haven't really figured it out. I'm working on not feeling guilty when I'm putting laundry away while I get glared at because I'm not playing Pop The Pig.

Oh no, You need to teach her phone manners.

One of the first rules is that when a person is on the phone, we do not interrupt.

Let her know she may sit next to you quietly while you are on the phone, but it is rude to interrupt.

Practice how to answer a phone, How to speak on a phone call and then have your husband join in and interrupt you while you are "speaking with your daughter".. She will see that it is not nice for anyone to interrupt..

Good time to also teacher things like, we do not talk on cell phones while driving. We pull over and talk.

We do not talk on the phone at the dinner table. We may ask to be excused and walk to a different room to have a private conversation.

When we go to Church, restaurant... we silence the phone.. Manners can be taught just through every day behaviors.. Thank you, your welcome, hello, good bye, may I please? Yes, you may. No I am sorry you may not..

I have a granddaughter who is 4 and is like that also with me. At her house she plays by herself but here she not only wants me or grandpa to play with her all the time, she directs the play, telling us what we are suppose to say and do, it is funny as grandparents but as parents it would get old pretty fast. I know my daughter in law included my granddaughter in on the cleaning the house. When she washed walls she would give a wet washcloth to Emma even at age 2 to wash walls too. Dishes she would let her help by letting her play in the dishwater which she made sure wasn't too hot. My other daughter in law lets her daughter help when she wants to make jewlery or sew and now that she has a second child I think they entertain each other more.
When your daughter demands you to get off the phone, just remind her that it is rude and you need her to be patient for a few more minutes. You may have a timer close by and set it for 4 minutes or 5 minutes and tell her you will get off the phone when the timer gets off if she plays by herself and doesn't tell you to get off the phone while it is going. When you want to read make it a reading time for you both. Give her special books that are just for reading time, picture books at that age and set the timer for 15 minutes and you read your book while she reads hers. She won't have a long attention span here so you might have to ask her to find certain pictures like "can you find all the doggies in these books?" If you want to get dishes done, give her water paints at the table or finger paints. They love to do that.

Most of all remember that they aren't young very long. She is 2 and half now but in another 2 and half years she will be starting school and with that she will grow so fast, you won't be able to keep up with her. I know the school years are a blur with my kids and I did a lot with them during those years, sports, scouts, sunday school. Now my oldest is almost 30 and I my daughter is the same age as when I had my third child and my youngest passed away this past June. So please enjoy every moment you can with your child, it doesn't last forever but the memories do.

my 3 1/2 year old always wants me to play with her. I do play but it's never enough for her liking. I like to read books and talk but she just wants me to role play with her toys...not my favorite thing in the world and if I wanna pee or talk on the phone well then I'm the most wanted and interesting person in the world in that moment. Lately I just stop when I'm on the phone and ask her what she needs and it's usually nothing then tell her that's the only question&chance she gets to ask/talk while I'm on the phone (or using the bathroom). I'm not sure what all the other moms suggested but this seems to work for us sometimes. Nothing I do works all the time but whatcha gonna do...they are little and nuts

Yes, my son is 3 1/2, also an only child and does this. He also tells my husband and me to stop talking.

Yes and she will outgrow it no matter how you handle it now.