Hi V.,
when I initially returned to work it was full time 12 hour days. I found that my son really didn't tolerate the 12 hours very well and it was very difficult for day care.
You are in a different situation as you have close relatives, including dad, who will be providing child care while you are at work.
Some of it will come down to trial and error as to what is the best pattern for you and yours. Does grouping shifts work best or spreading them out more? You may also want to look at flexibility with both shifts. If you start on Days can you transfer to Nights if you think it would work better? What if you start on Nights? Will there still be a day shift position available? Which shift has the greatest seniority when it comes to scheduling your actual shifts, vacations, etc?
Some find that night shift is easier to schedule the pump breaks but that depends on the exact unit and staff. With days I found I sometimes needed to tell the charge "I need to pump or explode, your choice!" before I was assigned coverage for a break. Of course these were the days before major federal penalties were being enforced for missed breaks and before mandatory staffing levels were in place. It should be different now.
I've seen both work for various friends and colleagues. Which shift do you physically, mentally, emotionally prefer? How will it impact the other care givers?
It really is a very personal decision for each family.
Best of luck
K. H.
PS I now juggle three per diem positions so that I have the flexibility to meet my 8 year olds after school needs. We all do the best we can. :)