Right Handed or Left?

Updated on December 09, 2010
V.D. asks from Smithfield, UT
13 answers

My question is when do children decide what handed they are?

My daughter is 3 and she still uses both equally for eating, coloring, and opening doors. Hmmmm is she ambidextrous?

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

I think she'll probably develop a dominant hand soon. When she starts getting interested in writing her letters and numbers for real, or cutting her own food, she'll likely demonstrate preference for one.

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K.F.

answers from New York on

I'm anbidextrous and so is my son we use both. I only really use my right hand for writing and my left for everything else but am capable of writing with the left hand too. I definitely use scissors with my left. Usually school will make you choose a hand but if you could develop her natural leaning towards both before school this would be great for her. It's cool to be able to use both and be confident.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

I don't know that there is any particular age when a child chooses a dominant hand. It's good to be ambidextrous. I'd be patient while encouraging her to use both and wait and see.

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J.P.

answers from Boise on

I remember reading that you SHOULDN'T see a preference before the age of 3, and eventually they will start to favor one over the other, especially as they start writing.

S.B.

answers from Topeka on

She could be ambidextrous. They will for sure figure this out on their own. I would not press for her to chose one or the other. Allow her to find what is comfortable for her. My son is 4 and he was kind of that way for a while. But now he is certainly left handed. My daughter is also left handed and she is 8. However, they both use their right hand for alot of things. They can't help but do this since Mom is right handed and teaches them with the right hand. hehe! It does not confuse them.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I think it's between 3 and 4 when they "decide" which hand they will use. My oldest is a lefty and was mostly ambidextrous until about 3 1/2. He will occasionally use his right hand when his left is tired. My mom is a lefty and leftys usually are more proficient with the right than right-handed people are with their left. We live in a right handed world.

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X.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Does she color with both hands?

I'm a lefty, but I do some things with my right hand. The only thing that I can't do with both hands are writing.

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

My lefties used both hands until preschool, when the teachers would put the crayons in their right hands and they would switch. .

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

From what I've read/observed... some kids are stong left/right from the beginning... but most are like your daughter. They do both equally. It usually "happens" when teachers or parents start teaching writing.

Building up the muscles in order to actually write for more than a minute or two is painstaking and exhausting. (If you're not ambi, try writing with your non writing hand for 10 minutes. DARE you. Even after 20-30 YEARS of using your hands and building up the muscles, you are going to be in screaming pain.) Because it takes SO long to build up the muscles to even write for 10 minutes (practicing every day for months)... teachers understandably don't want to double the time it takes to teach children to write. They simply don't HAVE that time for something that is basically redundant. (We can also write with our feet, but how many of us spend the hundreds of hours to learn that?).

But yeah... it takes months. AND that's after you already know how to read and spell and how to write & recognize letters to begin with. For kids, who are ALSO learning how to recog letters, replicate them, read, and spell... the entire process is very very labor intense. Usually it takes 2-3 years before they're "good" at writing. And few children (or adults) are willing to repeat the process with their other hand.

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D.P.

answers from Raleigh on

My son did too. Now at 4, he is writing letters and words and is definitely right-handed. If he tried writing words with his left hand, he writes them backwards- from right to left! Give it a little time and she will eventually show her preference.

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N.W.

answers from Eugene on

4 kiddos here. They all showed hand preference from the beginning, 2 right handed, 1 total leftie and one ambidextrous. The ambi writes and eats with his right nand and throws, kicks and plays sports as a leftie. He was like that from the start.

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T.I.

answers from San Francisco on

My daughter does this too! I am a lefty and her father is right handed.

B.B.

answers from Dallas on

My ODS is 3.5 and still uses both hands for many things, but mostly his right for writing/coloring.

I'm not sure if there's a "magic" age where they decide which hand they will use. What you need to do is just continue to let her lead. Don't offer a crayon, scissors, fork, or anything to a certain hand. Hold it to her middle and let her pick which one she wants to use.

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