D.,
My son was diagnosed at 5 weeks old and is now doing better at 17 weeks (4 months). I remember telling my friends about the agony of hearing him scream, arch his back, etc. We switched from medicine to medicine. Nothing was working and we were all miserable. My husband and I thought..."this isn't the way it's supposed to be". You are not alone. You are not crazy. You have what is called a "high needs" child. Unfortunately, it takes time for her insides to grow up. In the meantime...I have a few suggestions that worked for us. They weren't quick fixes...but they worked.
*Use a bouncy seat for sleeping. This will help her not reflux at night. My son has slept in his since he was 1 month old.
*Realize that any medicine you try takes some time to start working. We tried Zantac and Prilosec. It took Zantac 2 agonizing weeks to start working. After one week of Prilosec, we went back to the Zantac.
*Frequency and dosage is key. My son gets 1mL of Zantac 3 times a day which works out to be every 6 hours while he is awake. This is down from the 4 times a day he was first on. I even gave it to him while he was sleeping in order to make sure it was in his system. I no longer do this.
*Keep your little girl elevated at least 30 minutes after each feeding. This is very straining on the arms, but it will help with digestion. I use a Bjorn to help my aching arms.
*Elevate your baby when you are feeding her. This too helps with digestion.
*Keep watch over your daughter's weight and that she is continuing to "thrive".
*They say that breastfeeding is best for refluxers. Did you recently stop? If so, you may be able to speak with a lactation specialist.
*If you are breastfeeding, they suggest less quantity/more frequent feedings a day.
*Practice "attachment parenting". It has worked wonders for our son.
*Check out Dr. Sears web site for more information on what to do.
I can't imagine how difficult it must be with a toddler too. I recently made a friend who has a 3 year old and a 6 month old refluxer. I could put you in contact with her if you like. Let me know and I'll get you connected via email.
Know that crying is a natural release. I can remember days when I would lie face down on the floor, crying and praying as he screamed--because absolutely nothing I could do was helping him. Be sure to take good care of yourself, your babies need their mommy to be healthy as well.
S. (mommy to 4 month old Robby)